Tag Archives: Wallace Monument

Ordinary, Scones

Stirling Highland Hotel

Internal view of Stirling Highland HotelIt’s Halloween, a celebration of ghouls and ghosts that we are at a loss to understand. We were brought up on Guy Fawkes and bonfire night, ‘penny for the guy’ and all that. However, we don’t remAfternoon tea at the Stirling Highland Hotelember such a brouhaha about halloween. Could it just be us being completely out of touch? Or could it be, perish the thought, just another hellish import from the US? Whatever it is you would not think that it would have any impact at all on, the altogether more wholesome world of, sconology. But you would be wrong! If you come here to the Stirling Highland Hotel and book an afternoon tea for two you will understand.

Discord

Afternoon tea is supposed to be civilised and civilising, relaxing, romantic even. In this hotel, however, some twisted, devilish mind has designed an afternoon tea with three of everything. It has to be some sort of macabre joke? If anything is going to produce disharmony and discord it is providing three scones for two people. What on earth are they thinking about? Guess you could decide to have one and a half each … but really? A scone at the Stirling Highland HotelThere was also three of each kind of sandwich? Luckily we survived the experience without any blood being spilled. In fact, overall it was quite enjoyable but definitely not one of our finest afternoon tea experiences. And we’ve had a few!

This building used to be the High School of Stirling. The original school was situated in Castle Wynd for over 300 years (now the Portcullis Hotel) and moved here in 1854 before moving to a brand new building in Torbrex village in 1962. The Torbex building was demolished in 2008 after a mere 46 years, so, if history teaches us anything, it certainly doesn’t teach us anything about building schools.

The view towards the Wallace Monument from the Stirling Highland Hotel
View from the hotel towards the Ochil hills and the Wallace Monument
Lord North and Madrid

To prove the point, the current school, near the University of Stirling, was built under one of Labour’s dreaded PFI initiatives. So no matter how long the building lasts we will be paying for it whether it stands or not … heyho! One thing which sets the Stirling Highland Hotel apart is a fully functional observatory on the roof. Not a lot of hotels can boast of that.

External view of Stirling Highland Hotel
The entrance to the hotel

If history does teach us anything, it has to be that history doesn’t teach us much at all. When America declared independence in 1776, Lord North’s UK government made exactly the same noises, almost word for word, as the Madrid government is making towards Catalonia today … and see where that got us! Happy halloween!

FK8 1DU    tel: 01786 272727     Stirling Highland Hotel

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

Legends Coffee House

Our island hopping adventures have sadly come to an end and we are now back in the real world. At Legends Coffee House in Stirling to be precise. The legend referred to in the name is, of course, William Wallace, Scottish hero, general all round good guy and star of the movie Braveheart. This facility serves visitors to the Wallace Monument … it is where you start and finish your visit. Internal view of Legends Coffee House at the Wallace Monument, Stirling

Tartan stuff

You should drop in … especially if you have just completed the climb to the top of the monument. We had friends from Arizona with us. We forced them up the Abbey Craig, the hill on which the monument stands. Then the 246 steps to the top of the monument, all with the bribe of a scone. We were having to pay up. Memorabilia at the Legends Coffee House at the Wallace Monument, StirlingMost of this place is  new since we were last here and thankfully takes up the site previously occupied by a diabolical statue of Wallace. The shop is full of the usual stuff that we suspect tourists must get really fed up with after they have been round some of Scotland’s main attractions. It always seems much the same  tartan or saltire emblazoned memorabilia everywhere you go.

That said, Legends Coffee House, in spite of being quite busy, was clean, tidy and appeared well run. But, dear oh dear, our scones felt really heavy! So heavy, in fact, we thought we might have to brandish Wallace’s mighty double handed claymore to cut them in half … hopes of impressing our American friends with a good Scottish scone were fading fast. A scone at the Legends Coffee House at the Wallace Monument, StirlingAs it turned out, however, they tasted quite good and our friends were fascinated by the butter, jam and cream rituals which we don’t even think about. And at least it was all Scottish produce. All in all, it evolved into quite a good experience for everyone … but not good enough for a topscone unfortunately.

Just a blur

This monument to William Wallace is here because of his famous victory over the much larger English army at the Battle of Stirling Bridge in 1297 which helped establish Scotland as a free and independent nation. Goodness knows what he would have thought of the ‘parcel of rogues’ that, almost 400 years after his death, forced Scotland into a union with England. Even worse, that Scotland is still in it. He was hung, drawn and quartered in London. His head and body parts distributed throughout the land as a warning to any other uppity Scots. So no grave to spin in. If he had one, he would would just be a blur.

His statue looks down from its stance high on the monument at Scotland’s present day subordination and it must be thinking “what a right feckless bunch I gave my life for”!  Our friends are back on the other side of the pond now, having survived Scotland … and the scones.

Evening view of the Wallace Monument, Stirling
The Wallace Monument stands on the Abbey Craig in the evening light.

FK9 5LF    tel: 01786 472140     Legends

BREAKING NEWS. Our Middle East correspondent has just filed a report on a post box he came across in Jaffa, Tel Aviv. Readers may know Jaffa from the biblical stories about Jonah, Solomon and St Peter but more probably through cakes. The post box in question was manufactured by McDowall Steven & Co who, in 1912 took over the Laurieston Ironworks in Falkirk and made post boxes until 1958 when it closed. Jaffa was occupied in 1947 so presumably these post boxes date from then. There’s nothing quite like scones to broaden the mind.Letter box in Jaffa, made in Falkirk