Tag Archives: Vladamir Putin

Ordinary, Scones

Kerrera Tea Garden – Again

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The government’s Department of Weasel Words has gone into overdrive trying to justify their pathetic response to coronavirus and the BBC has taken to only reporting on NHS England. Should we be surprised? Well, back in 2018, we were at the Kerrera Tea Garden and as you will see we were still smarting from being cheated out of Scotland’s independence in 2014. The defeat was brought about by a coalition of Labour, Conservative and media lies. What really surprised us the most was that we were surprised. We knew they could stoop very low, just not that low. Anyway, let’s go back two years.

When it comes to Scottish Independence many people who voted NO in the 2014 referendum have been posting on social media “My Journey to YES”. Well, this is similar but, of course, it’s more “Our journey to a SCONE”! Let us explain. Some scones can be relatively difficult to come by but that is generally down to cost e.g. Claridges, the Connaught, rather than geographical location.

Gallanach Ferry from the Isle of Kerrera
Gallanach Ferry only takes 12 people, no cars. If you are number 13 you have to wait for it to come back. We had to wait for it to come back three times
Getting there

Getting to the Kerrera Tea Garden, however, involves a road trip to Oban, a passenger ferry and then an hour’s walk over rough hill track. That’s just to get there … and the same back! Signpost for the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of KerreraThere is nothing along the way other than sheep but luckily they have easy to follow signposts to guide the weary traveller. Although the day was quite cloudy it was hot so by the time we came on that last sign we were extremely relieved. Stomach and arthritic joints were screaming for sustenance and rest. External view of the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of Kerrera

The Kerrera Tea Garden is exactly what it says. A fairly large garden in which there are lots of tables where you can sit and have tea. If the weather ever gets inclement, perish the thought, there is the Byre, a rustic but charming converted cowshed.

Inside the Byre at the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of Kerrera
The Byre
Sacre Bleu

We were attended to by a very mannerly young chap who was obviously not a local. He was from Singapore and was studying law in London. Goodness knows how he found his way here for a summer job? A scone at the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of KerreraThe scones are made fresh every morning so after a light lunch we thought they should be sampled. We couldn’t come all this way and not sample the scones after all! Unfortunately, they were a tad disappointing. Just a little on the solid side and with a slightly sweet taste that wasn’t to our liking. They weren’t bad but not a topscone. Pity, because everything else about this place is fantastic. If you ever get the chance you should definitely visit, it’s worth the effort.

When we arrived there was a party of six French folks who were explaining that they just wanted coffee because they had their own sandwiches … mais non, sacre blue, mon Dieu! Perhaps it is just as well we are leaving the EU! They were politely told to take themselves off to yonder distant hill to have their picnic. When we were leaving they were making their way back for their coffee and didn’t seem at all putout. The Auld Alliance is intact!

View of Gylen Castle on the Isle of Kerrera
The ruined Gylen Castle overlooking the Firth of Lorne

We finished off our visit with the short walk from the Tea Garden to Gylen Castle which sits on the southern tip of the island. It was built in 1582 by the Clan MacDougall but was besieged then burned by Covenanters in 1647.  Ironically the siege was successful because of a shortage of water. The castle’s spring was insufficient in the prevailing dry spell so the MacDougalls surrendered. The same would have happened today where we have almost forgotten what rain looks like! When William Turner visited in 1831, he was fascinated by the ruin and made several sketches of the castle which are now in London’s Tate Gallery.

View of Ben Cruachan from the Isle of Kerrera
Looking east with twin peaks of Ben Cruachan in the middle distance
Sheep talk

On our return walk to the ferry we were almost deafened at one point by sheep talking to each other. Their exact words were “baa, baa, baa, baa, baa.” The noise was incredible! We came to the conclusion that they must have been discussing the effects of Brexit on the Common Agricultural Policy. They were making much more sense than our Westminster parliamentarians! After Trump’s visit to see May in London and Putin in Helsinki, I said to Pat “I think Trump’s a very clever man“, then, when I saw the look on her face, had to explain that I had misspoken and what I actually meant to say was that he was a complete and utter idiot.

Ex KGB, Vladamir Putin is beginning to look like the only sane politician around and that says something! Our “journey to a scone” was one of the most enjoyable in a long time. A big fat YES to the Kerrera Tea Garden.Logo for the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of Kerrera
PA34 4SX      tel: 01631 566367         Kerrera Tea Garden

K6 telephone box on the Isle of Kerreraps: This is the only telephone box on the Isle of Kerrera and as you can see it is a K6. No manufacturer’s badge so it could be either Falkirk, Kirkintilloch or Glasgow in origin. Now it functions, not as a telephone box, but as the only shop on the island … selling postcards.

Telephone cables

If you found that interesting here is another little snippet that will be of interest to all those who have spent restless nights wondering where the first subsea transatlantic telephone cable came ashore in the UK. Well wonder no more, it was here at Little Horsehoe Bay on Kerrera in 1956. It operated until 1978. The other end was in Clarenville, Newfoundland. You can now rest easy.

View of first trans Atlantic telephone cable landing point on the Isle of Kerrera
Little Horseshoe Bay with Oban in the distance. In 1263 Horseshoe Bay housed a fleet of one hundred and twenty longship galleys under the command of Norwegian King Haakon 1. More recently, it provided all the lobsters for Cunard’s transatlantic liners.
Wilting

We met loads of tourists, some walking, some on bikes, all were complaining about the heat! They said that the publicity for holidays in Scotland had not prepared them for weeks of hot dry weather. C’est la vie … haste ye back!

These days, the Kerrera Tea Garden and that ‘journey to a scone’ seem almost otherworldly.

KERRERA SHED

With everyone preoccupied with social distancing, we don’t particularly want to get into a deep philosophical debate about sheds. However, “When is a shed, not a shed?”. For example, is a wooden garage not just a shed with big doors or do the doors define it as something else? Is a shed with large windows a summerhouse and therefore no longer a shed? We don’t know the answer but you will be relieved to hear that I don’t photograph garages or summerhouses even if they are still sheds. 

A shed on the Isle of Kerrera
Okay, it’s a composting toilet .. but still a shed. Near the tearoom and Gylen Castle

I knew it was a mistake in our COVID-19 Newsflash post creating new categories willy-nilly however I did not expect my better half to join in. It raises yet another philosophical question “When is a scone not a scone?’. When it’s a cheese muffin, that’s when! These muffins were absolutely delicious but definitely not scones and shouldn’t really have a place on this blog however in the interests of domestic harmony here is the picture. To be fair, we managed to swap four cheese muffins for three of our neighbour’s tomato plants making one cheese muffin worth 0.75 tomato plants. Fantastic, a sign of the times perhaps?Cheese muffins

 All this isolation stuff has driven the world mad. We have even heard rumours of Texas folks baking scones … unbelievable! It’s just a rumour.

Ordinary, Scones

Kerrera Tea Garden

When it comes to Scottish Independence many people who voted NO in the 2014 referendum have been posting on social media “My Journey to YES”. Well this is similar but, of course, it is more “Our journey to a SCONE”! Let us explain. Some scones can be relatively difficult to come by but that is generally down to cost e.g. Claridges, the Connaught, rather than geographical location.

Gallanach Ferry from the Isle of Kerrera
Gallanach Ferry only takes 12 people, no cars. If you are number 13 you have to wait for it to come back. We had to wait for it to come back three times
Getting there

Getting to the Kerrera Tea Garden  however involves a road trip to Oban, a ferry and then an hours walk over rough hill track. That’s just to get there … and the same back! Signpost for the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of KerreraThere is nothing along the way other than sheep but luckily they have easy to follow signposts to guide the weary traveller. Although the day was quite cloudy it was hot so by the time we came on that last sign we were extremely relieved. Stomach and arthritic joints were screaming for sustenance and rest. External view of the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of Kerrera

The Kerrera Tea Garden is exactly what it says. A fairly large garden in which there are lots of tables where you can sit and have tea. If the weather ever gets inclement, perish the thought, there is the Byre, a rustic but charming converted cowshed.

Inside the Byre at the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of Kerrera
The Byre
Sacre Blue

We were attended to by a very mannerly young chap who was obviously not a local. He was from Singapore and was studying law in London. Goodness knows how he found his way here for a summer job? A scone at the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of KerreraThe scones are made fresh every morning so after a light lunch we thought they should be sampled. We couldn’t come all this way and not sample the scones after all! Unfortunately they were a tad disappointing. Just a little on the solid side and with a slightly sweet taste that wasn’t to our liking. They weren’t bad but not a topscone. Pity, because everything else about this place is fantastic. If you ever get the chance you should definitely visit, it’s worth the effort.

When we arrived there was a party of six French folk who were explaining that they just wanted coffee because they had their own sandwiches … mais non, sacre blue, mon dieu! Perhaps it is just as well we are leaving the EU! They were politely told to take themselves off to thonder distant hill to have their picnic. When we were leaving they were making their way back for their coffee and didn’t seem at all put out. The Auld Alliance is intact!

View of Gylen Castle on the Isle of Kerrera
The ruined Gylen Castle overlooking the Firth of Lorne

 

buy cialis pill cute-n-tiny.com The blood supply into the erection containers made of spongy tissue called as corpus cavernosum to relax and smoothen. Epillsrx.com offers levitra best price at a 100% lowest-price guarantee, which ensures customers that they have received from the online course and it remains fresh and clear in the mind. Hair follicles have a sensitivity to DHT – so when the DHT is present in discover address now cialis cheapest the follicles, it makes them miniaturize – resulting in an abnormal production of the hormone adrenocorticotropin. This issue cialis canada generico might not be a matter of life and death in some extreme cases. We finished off our visit with the short walk from the Tea Garden to Gylen Castle which sits on the southern tip of the island. It was built in 1582 by the Clan MacDougall but was besieged then burned by Covenanters in 1647.  Ironically the siege was successful because of a shortage of water. The castle’s spring was insufficient in the prevailing dry spell so the MacDougalls surrendered. The same would have happened today where we have almost forgotten what rain looks like! When William Turner visited in 1831, he was fascinated by the ruin and made several sketches of the castle which are now in London’s Tate Gallery.

View of Ben Cruachan from the Isle of Kerrera
Looking east with twin peaks of Ben Cruachan in the middle distance
Sheep talk

On our return walk to the ferry we were almost deafened at one point by sheep baaing to each other … baa, baa, baa, baa. The noise was incredible! We came to the conclusion that they must have been discussing the effects of Brexit on the Common Agricultural Policy. They were making much more sense than our Westminster parliamentarians! After Trump’s visit to see May in London and Putin in Helsinki, I said to Pat “I think Trump’s a very clever man”, then, when I saw the look on her face, had to explain that I had misspoken and what I actually meant to say was that he was a complete and utter idiot.

Ex KGB, Vladamir Putin is beginning to look like the only sane politician around and that says something! Our “journey to a scone” was one of the most enjoyable in a long time. A big fat YES to the Kerrera Tea Garden.Logo for the Kerrera Tea Garden on the Isle of Kerrera

PA34 4SX      tel: 01631 566367         Kerrera Tea Garden

K6 telephone box on the Isle of Kerreraps: This is the only telephone box on the Isle of Kerrera and as you can see it is a K6. No manufacturer’s badge so it could be either Falkirk, Kirkintilloch or Glasgow in origin. Now it functions, not as a telephone box, but as the only shop on the island … selling postcards.

Telephone cables

If you found that interesting here is another little snippet that will be of interest to all those who have spent restless nights wondering where the first subsea transatlantic telephone cable came ashore in the UK. Well wonder no more, it was here at Little Horsehoe Bay on Kerrera in 1956. It operated until 1978 and the other end was in Clarenville, Newfoundland. You can now rest easy.

View of first trans Atlantic telephone cable landing point on the Isle of Kerrera
Little Horseshoe Bay with Oban in the distance. In 1263 Horseshoe Bay housed a fleet of one hundred and twenty longship galleys under the command of Norwegian King Haakon 1. More recently, it provided all the lobsters for Cunard’s transatlantic liners.
Wilting

We met loads of tourists, some walking, some on bikes, all were complaining about the heat! They said that the publicity for holidays in Scotland had not prepared them for weeks of hot dry weather. C’est la vie … haste ye back!

Scones, Top

Knockinaam Lodge Hotel

As you already know we are always ready to go that extra mile in the cause of sconology no matter how much discomfort and distress this may cause. This post is no exception and Knockinaam Lodge Hotel is where it’s at. Lying in its own little cove in the cliffs just south of Portpatrick, it is very private. So private in fact that we had difficulty finding it. So private that Churchill and Eisenhower planned the D-Day landings here. When you get here you kind of get the feeling that nothing has changed much in the intervening years. You can almost see Churchill sitting in the big  leather fireside armchair, whisky and cigar in hand. Knockinaam Lodge Hotel dining room and barAt the reception desk we were initially concerned that our room did not appear on the communication system. However they assured us that all we had to do was pick up the phone and they would attend to our every need … phew!

Servants bells at Knockinaam Lodge Hotel, Mull of Galloway
Our room didn’t have a bell
Reminiscing
Knockinaam has that comfortable homely feel about it which makes it the perfect place to chillax. And that was exactly what we had in mind. No swimming pool but its own beach in Port of Spittal Bay more than made up for that. We could sit there looking over the North Channel toward Northern Ireland and reminisce on the many happy years we spent living there … bless!Knockinaam Lodge Hotel beach over looking Port of Spittal Bay
Silver dishes

But enough of our bleating, we are here and we will just have to make the best of it. Lets get to the scones. We would have loved to have had afternoon tea however our schedule simply made that impossible. Instead we just had tea and a scone. We had been warned that the scones were big so we shared. A scone at Knockinaam Lodge Hotel, Mull of GallowaySeated in front of a lovely log fire when the scone came it was beautifully presented with crisp linen napkins and lots of jam and cream in silver dishes. There was absolutely nothing to complain about here … a very easy topscone. If you ever visit Portpatrick there is a three mile cliff top path that takes you to Knockinaam and this, or afternoon tea, would be a perfect stop before the return journey.

Shenanigans

You have probably guessed by now that we are not exactly roughing it. However, in order to bring you the full spectrum of scone news we do feel obliged to come to places like this from time to time. Entirely on your behalf you understand! Sitting here, you can’t help but wonder what the Churchill and Eisenhower of old would have made of today’s political shenanigans between Trump, May, Putin and Assad. We think that they, like us, would have been aghast. If one has to wonder about such things, however, this is definitely the place to do it. We thoroughly recommend Knockinaam. It could have been the six course dinners every night. Perhaps the wonderful staff. It could have been the beautiful rooms. In fact it could have been just about anything, it was all good … and a great scone.View of Knockinaam Lodge Hotel from the shoreDG9 9AD     tel: 01776 810471     Knockinaam Lodge

Ordinary, Scones

The good ship Forth Belle

What?? Sometimes we go to extraordinary lengths in order to broaden the horizons of our sconey readers. That said, seldom do we have to risk life and limb quite like this. Nevertheless, undaunted, on a fine sunny day in March, we set sail from the Hawes Pier in South Queensferry into the uncharted waters of floating scones. We were aboard the good ship Forth Belle and the name of our trip was “The Blackness Castle, Three Bridges and … wait for it … Cream Tea Cruise”. Okay, now you understand!

Rosyth Dockyard and the Prince of Wales aircraft carrier
Rosyth Dockyard with the partially built Prince of Wales aircraft carrier on the left
The Prince of Wales

We were sailing up river under the old Forth Road Bridge, then the new Queensferry Crossing and before long we were passing the Rosyth Dockyard. Britain doesn’t have any planes to put on the aircraft carrier being built here but now that Putin has been forced to take on the mantle of bogey-man-in-chief we think the money will probably be found. Presumably after we’ve forked out the £300b for weapons of mass destruction like Trident of course. If Putin eventually gets put back in his box and there are to be no planes, the Prince of Wales will probably be put on Gumtree or eBay. Not him, the ship!

The restaurant on the Forth Belle cruise
Help yourself cream tea

 

For our cream tea we had to go below to the galley (hope you are heeding the nautical terminology) where there was a table from which we had to equip ourselves with the various accoutrements for a cream tea. Thankfully there was someone to serve us tea and coffee. Okay okay, we may have over dramatised the life aA scone on the Forth Belle cruisend limb bit somewhat but there were other dangers. Because all the tables had been taken, we had to butter, jam and cream a scone on our knees with a plastic knife while the boat pitched and rolled mercilessly. Okay, that’s over dramatised as well! Maybe it was because of this high sense of adventure, maybe it was because of the chilling wind out here on the open water but our tea and scones tasted delicious.

Submarine U-21

Obviously there was no topscone award, there were certain shortcomings when it came to things like presentation. However, overall we thoroughly enjoyed what we had. Could easily have eaten another one. By this time we were at Blackness Castle which was as far up river as we would go before making the return journey. In a way we were mimicking German submarine U-21 which penetrated this far up the river in 1914 before turning back as well. They probably were not having a cream tea though!

Blackness Castle from the Forth Belle river cruiser
Blackness Castle , centre, looks like a battleship and may have scared off U-boat 21
Useful info

The crew of the good ship Forth Belle gave us all sorts of interesting snippets of information. Did you know, for instance, that the iconic Forth Rail Bridge weighs 100 tons more when it is raining. It also grows in length by 7 meters when it’s hot? No, we didn’t know either. However just think how many people you can bore at dinner parties with this sort of information. Alas, we didn’t see any seals or dolphins but there were plenty of cormorants, eider ducks and the like. The  cruise was great fun, highly recommended. Our trip was the last of the day. It was the only one we could get because all the others were fully booked. What some people will do for a free cream tea!!

The Forth Road Bridges at sunset
Looking west from Hawes Pier
Kiwi scones

Our Kiwi correspondent kindly reported recently that even Ed Sheeran will do anything for a free scone. Ed Sheeran and New Zealand's prime minister Jacinda ArdernApparently New Zealand‘s prime minister, Jacinda Ardern, couldn’t fit any of Ed’s eight NZ concerts into her busy schedule … so she invited him over to her place for a cuppa and a scone. He readily accepted because unbeknown to anyone up until then … he’s a fervent sconey! Why did the BBC not report this? It’s right up there with the usual stuff they like to report.

EH30 9TB               tel: 0131 331 3030              Forth Boat Tours

Ordinary, Scones

Buttercup Cafe

Can’t actually remember the last time we were in North Berwick but it was certainly some years ago. On this visit, if it wasn’t for the fact that we know better, we would say that everyone in town was more than a little devious, Machiavellian even. You know who you are! But that’s another story. Sign for the Buttercup Cafe in North Berwick

North Berwick itself is a lovely little seaside town with lots of art galleries, craft shops, restaurants and cafes. It consists almost entirely of rather grand Victorian houses and is surrounded by golf courses. To top it all off, not content with one beach, North Berwick has two. It was called North Berwick to distinguish it from South Berwick (now Berwick-on-Tweed) which, at one time was in Scotland.

In the 16th century the town was a hotbed of witchcraft. More witches being tried here  than anywhere else. One Agnes Sampson was accused of making a potion which made the seas rough for King James VI and his new wife, Anne of Denmark on their return voyage to Scotland. In 1591 she was tortured until a confession was obtained then burned at the stake. Thankfully there’s not so much of that sort of thing going on these days. At least we did not see anything like that on our visit.Internal view of the Buttercup Cafe in North Berwick

Surf boards

The tiny Buttercup Cafe is in the centre of town and has just a four tables and a serving counter. The predominant decor is surf boards. Now although the waves just a few meters from the door were definitely big enough for surfing the temperature, at a smidgen above freezing, definitely was not … brrrr! A scone at the Buttercup Cafe in North BerwickThe welcome here though was very warm and we were soon kitted out with a fruit and a plain scone and offered a wide range of jams to go with them. They were nicely presented and each scone came with a generous pot of clotted cream. What’s not to like? Nothing as it happens but we eventually decided that, wonderful as they were, the scones were not quite topscones … shame.

What’s happened to Brexit?

Ignorance of medical help take their condition to the next stage vardenafil 20mg tab are the critical male populations deprived of treatment. You do not generic levitra face any relationship issue until your love-lifegoes good. They fail to acknowledge the extent check it out online cialis or gravity of the injury. The Acupuncture is a medical treatment that has practiced for thousands of years in China cialis canadian prices and other countries as well. Isn’t it wonderful how, with no proof whatsoever, Putin has been branded public enemy number one because of the Sergei Skripal affair. We are not taking Putin’s side, far from it, but we do think he has good reason to be more than a little disgruntled at the actions of the West recently.May’s refusal to provide him with a sample of the deadly toxin is impolite if not Machiavellian. In fact, knickers have become so twisted that Brexit has barely got a mention recently. Gosh, who would have thought it!

West beach, North Berwick
Stormy day on west beach, North Berwick

EH39 4HE    tel: 01620 894985     Buttercup Cafe FB

p.s. This K6, constructed in the Lion Foundry, Kirkintilloch was found at the west end of the High Street in North Berwick. It had been converted for use as a cash machine but retained an outside telephone … for very small people??A K6 converted to a cash machine in North Berwick

Ordinary, Scones

Brian’s Café

Yesterday morning we were back at the Hippodrome in Bo’ness to see The Shape Of Water. An unexpectedly enjoyable film. It’s really a love fantasy but it also turns out to be surprisingly topical. The Americans had captured a unique South American water monster with peculiarly human characteristics. Honestly, it’s better than it sounds! Rather than let the US acquire any  advantage by studying the beast and unearthing its secrets the Russians, in the form of KGB agents, plotted to kill it with a lethal injection. Have you heard of any similar stories recently?

It is amusing to see the media in a frenzy wondering where the nerve agents directed against Sergei Skripal and his daughter could have come from. Without ever mentioning the world’s biggest stockpile of such chemical weapons at Porton Down. Only eight miles from Salisbury where Skripal was found. Interior view of Brian's Café in BonessAll fingers seem to be pointing at Vladimir Putin however and probably with good reason.

Have you noticed a rather worrying trend among world leaders recently? Putin, who unexpectedly came to power because Boris Yeltsin hadn’t enough blood in his vodka system, now finds himself drunk on power itself. He has manufactured a situation where he can remain in power indefinitely. Likewise with President Xi of China. Power is a great corrupter and both men now seem to think that they are omnipotent. Meanwhile, back in the USA, President Trump  knows he is omnipotent but, unlike Putin and Xi, hasn’t yet worked out a scam to keep the job for a life. Watch this space. Theresa May on the other hand will be forced to keep her job for life whether she likes it or not simply because it’s such a mess no one else wants it. Interior view of Brian's Café in Boness

Serafini family

Enough of all that. Just across the road from the Hippodrome is the imaginatively named Brian’s Cafe which, would you believe it, is owned by a chap called Brian, surname Curry. Its outward appearance is somewhat uninspiring and we did not have high hopes as we entered. A scone at Brian's Café in BonessThe interior is pleasant enough though and the staff were very friendly and helpful.

We were soon settled down with some tea and sharing a fruit scone. Okay, we sometimes indulge in reckless extravagance! There was no cream and the butter and jam were prepackaged but the scone itself was very good, not quite a topscone but pretty close.  The café has lots of what appeared to be family photographs hanging on the walls. When we asked about them we ended up being introduced to Brian himself. He had been sitting at another table with some friends. He’s a lovely guy who proceeded to take us round and explain his family history. Turns out that he is part of the Serafini family who not only had a cafe in Bo’ness but operated the York Café in Falkirk, a place we know very well.

Serafini family group from Brian's Café in Bo'ness
Serafini family from Barga. Brian’s aunt, Annie Curry, married Nathaniel (2nd from left, back row)

 

 

 

 

Scots locked up

What amazed us was that Brian’s aunt, a Bo’nessian born and bred, had married a Serafini and as a result was interned during WWII. It had never before occurred to us that Scots were also interned simply because of their association with Italians … unbelievable!

The Serafini's original café and their fish and chip van
The Serafini’s original café in Bo’ness  … and their fish and chip van c1950s

It was great listening to the many delightful childhood stories Brian had to tell. A far cry from today’s world of all-powerful autocrats and dastardly subterfuge.

EH51 0AA       tel: 01506 823815       Brian’s Café TA

p.s. News of an even bigger controversy came to us the other day courtesy of our correspondent, the Stenibrainfart. He reported that the National Trust in England had organised a cream tea at one of their venues in Cornwall and to publicise it they used a picture of a scone with a dollop of jam on top of the cream … arrgghh! National Trust picture of a cream tea scone

Now all self respecting sconeys worth their salt know that that is how they do it in Devon … and it’s just plain wrong! It is definitely not how they do it in Cornwall. Cornish folks have reportedly been resigning their NT membership in droves. A #JamFirst badgeThey felt so strongly they even produced #JamFirst badges to support the cause. Well done Cornwall, you tell ’em!

Scones, Uncategorized

The Beast from the East

This is not a proper scone post. It is simply an attempt to reassure all those kind sconeys (particularly those in the southern hemisphere) who have enquired after our well-being in the face of the Beast from the East. Putin’s gift to the west. We are fine, though things in general are pretty bad e.g. pastries from Greggs have been declared legal tender!

The title picture is of our car which hasn’t moved for almost a week. We can hear readers in Canada and Norway screaming “they call that snow”? Okay, okay, don’t mock! Unlike you, when we get snow, we  just wait for it to go away the next day. But this time it has been here for days! Nothing in Britain has moved much in the last week … very few cars on the roads, no trains, no flights. But you know all that!

Let us give you an instance about how Britain is coping. Yesterday, late afternoon, we decided to venture out as far as our local pub just to get out and have a walk if nothing else. We walked along the middle of the road, standing aside every time a car came along … only two passed. There was no one else out, the whole place was eerily quiet. We fully expected the pub to be  deserted, just a few hardy regulars, but no, it was ramjammed, we could hardly get in! We asked the harassed looking barmaid why it was so busy “cos nobody’s at their efing work” was the reply. That’s how Britain copes … just go to the pub!

State of ecstasy

We don’t have any pictures of scones to share but we are sending you this one of a partial scone. It was sent by one of our correspondents who has a home office at the bottom of his garden. His wife had baked some scones and braved the snow and the icy wind to bring some, complete with apricot jam, to her beloved. He thought that he would send us a picture but, in his heightened state of ecstasy, promptly forgot until there was barely anything left.What's left of a scone and apricot jam

Normal service

We can only apologise dear readers, but good competent scone correspondents are difficult to come by these days ..  a bit like politicians. We had to admire Theresa May saying that the EU would have to compromise. Is there a thinly veiled threat in there “if you don’t compromise we won’t leave”? Once again, thanks for all your concern. Hopefully we will be out and about very soon and normal sconology will be resumed.

Ordinary, Scones

The Loft – Crieff

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Perhaps you are aware that we have a fondness for shops that, by today’s standards, could be termed “a wee bit old-fashioned”. Maybe it’s because of the pace of modern life. Perhaps it’s because of standards of service. Maybe it’s just us? We don’t think of ourselves as “not keeping up” nor do we think of ourselves as particularly old. However, when you come across the likes of the much missed McEwens of Perth and the still current, Valentines of Crieff you do feel as if you are stepping back into a more comfortable, less frenetic world. And it’s nice.

Picture of frosted plant at Bennybeg near Crieff
Frosted hemlock at Bennybeg

 

Our Stenhousemuir correspondent (oft referred to as the SteniBrainFart) once had the temerity to suggest that the sad demise of McEwens of Perth had been caused by, what he felt, was a rather caustic scone review. Okay it wasn’t great but it was entirely coincidental to the downfall of our favourite shop. The nerve!

Back in town

Valentines of Crieff, on the other hand, is much smaller by comparison. Still alive and well though and kitting out the good folk of Crieff as it has done for years. It’s one of these places where, if your dress or trousers don’t fit exactly, they alter them until they do. For free! So it was that, after an hour long walk at Bennybeg Nature Trail (we saw a robin … yes, just a robin), we were back in Crieff picking up some alterations to purchases made a couple of weeks back when we were visiting an aunt (see Royal Hotel). Picture of the interior at The Loft, CrieffUnlike McEwens, Valentines does not have a café but next door is The Loft. A shop spread over three floors, selling furniture and lots of beautiful novelty items. And scones in the café at the back of the shop. Picture of a scone at The Loft, Crieff

Again we decided to have lunch then share a scone between us. In spite of it being very busy the service was great. Holding back our tea and scone until we had finished lunch. Served with nice little pots of butter, jam and cream our scone was really good. Just a gnat’s whisker off topscone, however. Good try though and we thoroughly enjoyed looking round the rest of the shop. Worth a visit if you find yourself in this neck of the woods.

What with the final section of the Queensferry Crossing being put in place as we write, ‘bridges’ seem to be the talking point of the day. Just down the road from where we are in Crieff, Dollerie House has a crooked bridge within its grounds specifically designed to stop witches crossing. And continuing with the bridge/witch theme, Theresa May’s offer to become a bridge between Donald Trump’s USA and the EU, has been roundly rejected by the EU. Best laid plans and all that. Maybe she will try holding Putin’s hand next?

Statistics

With Trump’s travel ban on Islamic immigrants now in place it is also interesting to look at the official US fatality figures for the past year. Exactly 2 Americans were killed by Islamic immigrants. This compared to 21 killed by armed toddlers and 11,737 killed by other Americans. You have to think seriously about whether or not we want a bridge at all? Seems like a different world to the one at The Loft and Valentines of Crieff. Long may they prosper.

PH7 4DL        tel: 01764 650008        The Loft

Scones, Top

Fonab Castle (revisited)

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As you are probably aware, we have long asserted that, in our humble opinion, the best scone in the world lives at Fonab Castle Hotel in Pitlochry. Since our first Fonab cream tea experience we have devoted much time and effort, not to mention expense, looking for a worthy challenger. However, in spite of all our testing at places as far apart as Ackergill Tower in Wick and Claridge’s in London, Fonab has managed to hold on to its position. It is  on the top tier of the cake stand as the topmost topscone.

However, it is now almost two years since we made that rather bold assertion. In our minds Fonab shone like a beacon in terms of ambience, presentation, service and quality. Okay it’s not the cheapest. It’s one of these “you know you’re worth it” places. But … perhaps, after such a long period of time, our combined memories were playing tricks on us? Something that, in our advancing years, is not only possible but highly likely! Maybe the scones would be awful and we would have to find a new benchmark …. aaarrgghh!

So it was with more than a little trepidation that we decided to return and reassess the Fonab scone. Luckily we could still remember the location of Pitlochry.

Winter view across Loch Faskally from Fonab Castle, Pitlochry
View across Loch Faskally towards Ben Vrackie from Fonab
Warm bowls

The trepidation was caused by fear of disappointment. What if there was a new chef with a different recipe. What if they were just different? Picture of a cream tea scone at Fonab Castle Hotel, PitlochryYou may remember that, on one visit, we actually asked the chef what his secret ingredient was for a good scone. The answer – “happiness in the kitchen!” Well, we need not have worried! This time around the service was impeccable, the ambience relaxing and comfortable, the views superb, the range of Scottish jams just brilliant, the coffee fantastic. And the scones were just perfect … warm and light as a feather. Not only were they presented in beautiful white linen napkins but even the serving bowls had been warmed. This is how scones should be treated!Picture of cream tea presentation at Fonab Castle Hotel, Pitlochry
So just to be clear. Let this be a clarion call to every posh hotel, coffee shop, tea house and greasy spoon we visit on our travels. When you see us coming this is what we expect if you are to have any chance of dislodging the Fonab scone from the pinnacle of sconiness. At just under £11 for a cream tea, it may be expensive but it is soooo worth it! Not only that but it turns out that the chef we spoke to about ingredients has long gone. And yet the scones were still delicious. There must be a lot of happiness in that kitchen!

Taking control

Such scrumptiousness lulls you into a warm sconey world where the trials and tribulations of a mad Trump/May/Putin world seem far far away. With the PM delivering a speech on Brexit yesterday that completely ignores the wishes of us folks north of the border, it also clarifies the situation. Scotland is going nowhere until it takes control of its own affairs. Oh dear, sconey world is so much nicer. … if only we could stay for ever?

PH16 5ND     tel: 01796 470140    Fonab Castle Hotel and Spa

Useful link: things to do in Pitlochry