Tag Archives: Theresa May

The Ground House

16 March 2017 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

Although the City of Stirling is only about 11 miles away from our home we hardly ever go there. Edinburgh yes, Glasgow yes, Stirling no. Occasionally we might dip into one of the out-of-town retail parks but never into the city centre itself. Mostly we just drive past it on our way to somewhere else. It was recognising this sorry state of affairs that led us to purposely go from one of these retail parks into the centre, just to check it out.

On the face of it, of course, Stirling has a lot to offer – a castle, a big pointy monument on a hill that can be seen from miles around and lots of other historic attractions full of guides dressed in period costume just in case you happen to be totally devoid of imagination. When you get to the centre however it is pretty obvious that Stirling, like most other towns, has not escaped the effects of all these retail parks on the outskirts. It looks a wee bit sorry for itself. Finding a tearoom was surprisingly difficult. We ended up having to ask but were soon directed towards this place The Ground House Coffee Company on King Street.

It has a pretty relaxed vibe with lots of students sitting tapping away on laptops and checking their phones but .. hey, so were we! The system is that you are given a menu, you take a seat and decide what you want then you go to the counter and tell them what you want, then you go back to your seat and wait for them to bring it to you. Is this self service or not?

Jam dilemmas

We bucked the system and ordered before we sat down because they had a selection of plain, cherry, fruit and apple and cinnamon scones right there in front of us at the counter. No point in wasting time looking at menus. Pat opted for fruit and I thought I would try the apple and cinnamon for a bit of a change. They didn’t have cream (not even scooshie) and they didn’t tell us the scones were going to be toasted but when they arrived they had almost been char grilled. We are never sure if this is scone abuse or not? In a way it seems a bit unnecessary but in another way it can sometimes work out quite well. Maybe you should just be given the choice.

Turned out that The Ground House was a place of dilemmas. The ordering system; the toasted scones; the lack of cream; the question – do you have jam with an apple and cinnamon scone or do you treat it more like a savoury cheese scone?

Scones at the Ground House, Stirling — Toasted apple and cinammon to the left and fruit to the right … is this scone abuse?

If you know the answer to this last point please get in touch. I decided to try and answer it myself by having one half without jam and the other half with. The result was that I enjoyed both! If I had to stake my life on it I would probably plump for jam. However, it’s a very close run thing? We are constantly wrestling with such problems … stressful! At the end of the day we enjoyed the scones and the coffee was excellent. We would recommend The Ground House Coffee Company to anyone – their pizzas look great by the way!

Wee Wallace and Big Wallace

Just across the road from this café, on top of the entrance to the Atheneum building, there is a statue of William Wallace … known as the Wee Wallace, presumably to differentiate it from the somewhat larger one on top of the hill about a mile away. You can make out the Wee Wallace left of centre in our title photograph above. We wonder what he would have made of Theresa May’s announcement today that Scotland cannot have a second referendum. Because it would not be fair for the people to have to vote before they know the outcome of the Brexit negotiations.

These weasel words try to ignore the fact that Scotland voted to stay in the EU … end of! Hence the need for another referendum before the UK leaves. Or is she saying that the UK might not be leaving after all?? We don’t think so … Wee Wallace doesn’t think so either and the Big Wallace certainly doesn’t think so!

FK8 1AY tel: 01786 357606 The Ground House FB

Ordinary, Scones

The Park Bistro

14 March 2017 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

In the year 1818 a man stood in a field somewhere between Edinburgh and Falkirk and drove his spade into the soil. He was starting to excavate a massive thirty one mile long ditch between the two towns which would eventually be filled with water. The Union Canal, as we know it today. Nowadays we have huge automated earth moving machines. It is quite extraordinary to think that this canal with all its tunnels and aqueducts had to be constructed entirely by hand. Millions of spadefuls mostly at the hands of hundreds of Highlanders and Irishmen.

The intention was to feed Edinburgh’s insatiable appetite for coal but today our own personal needs are much simpler because just a few yards from the canal’s towpath at Philpstoun is a converted cattle shed, the Park Bistro. We hoped it would satisfy our appetite for scones. For the many hundreds of people using the canal and the towpath The Park provides welcome respite from their exertions. Today, however, our exertions were pretty feeble since we arrived by car on our way home from Edinburgh.

Scooshie or whipped

Quite a while back we tried to get a scone here but they had just sold the last one so it was not to be. Today, however, there was no such problem … scones aplenty! When they arrived with our coffee we asked if there was any cream. The lady screwed her face up and said “only scooshie”. We screwed our faces up and said “no thanks”. However, just as we were about to cut into our first scone she suddenly reappeared placing a lovely bowl of whipped cream on our table … “stole it from the chef making a pavlova”! And, with a sly wink, she was off just as suddenly. Service, or what?

The coffee was good but the scones themselves were quite tricky to eat. They were so crumbly … much wiping and licking of fingers. Despite this we enjoyed our time at The Park … but not what we would describe as a topscone experience.

War of Devolution

Ajoining the café area is a wee room imaginatively called ‘The Wee Room’, which can be hired for private parties and in it hangs a tapestry showing Louis XIV defeating the Spanish near a canal in Bruges in the 1667 War of Devolution. Can’t think why it should be hanging here other than canals … oh, and devolution. A concept which seems in mortal danger these days given the Prime Minister’s attitude to Scotland and Brexit.

a tapestry at the Park Bistro, Linlithgow — Must have taken them ages to get ready for battle!

It’s a bit rich, when the Parliament in Edinburgh wants independence and almost every single Scottish MP at Westminster wants independence, for May to tell Sturgeon to ignore these ‘details’ and get on with the day job. Especially when May’s own domestic politics are in a much worse state than Scotland’s. Anyway, with the announcement yesterday of IndyRef2 we cannot expect the battle over the next few years to be conducted with anything like the aplomb of Louis XIV. It is going to be messy!

On a slightly different tack. These days most people would pay a premium to have a canal view but not so William Forbes of Callendar. When the Union Canal was being built he petitioned every MP at Westminster. He thought the canal might spoil the distant view from his mansion. The route was subsequently diverted through a half mile tunnel under Prospect Hill. It had to be hewn by hand from solid rock. Not a problem in those days when men were disposable. The great and the good will always look after each other. Looking at that tapestry again you kind of get the feeling they might take a break from battle for afternoon tea … and a scone!

EH49 6QY tel: 01506 846666 The Park

Ordinary, Scones

The Loft – Crieff

4 February 2017 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

Perhaps you are aware that we have a fondness for shops that, by today’s standards, could be termed “a wee bit old-fashioned”. Maybe it’s because of the pace of modern life. Perhaps it’s because of standards of service. Maybe it’s just us? We don’t think of ourselves as “not keeping up” nor do we think of ourselves as particularly old. However, when you come across the likes of the much missed McEwens of Perth and the still current, Valentines of Crieff you do feel as if you are stepping back into a more comfortable, less frenetic world. And it’s nice.

Picture of frosted plant at Bennybeg near Crieff — Frosted hemlock at Bennybeg

Our Stenhousemuir correspondent (oft referred to as the SteniBrainFart) once had the temerity to suggest that the sad demise of McEwens of Perth had been caused by, what he felt, was a rather caustic scone review. Okay it wasn’t great but it was entirely coincidental to the downfall of our favourite shop. The nerve!

Back in town

Valentines of Crieff, on the other hand, is much smaller by comparison. Still alive and well though and kitting out the good folk of Crieff as it has done for years. It’s one of these places where, if your dress or trousers don’t fit exactly, they alter them until they do. For free! So it was that, after an hour long walk at Bennybeg Nature Trail (we saw a robin … yes, just a robin), we were back in Crieff picking up some alterations to purchases made a couple of weeks back when we were visiting an aunt (see Royal Hotel). Unlike McEwens, Valentines does not have a café but next door is The Loft. A shop spread over three floors, selling furniture and lots of beautiful novelty items. And scones in the café at the back of the shop.

Again we decided to have lunch then share a scone between us. In spite of it being very busy the service was great. Holding back our tea and scone until we had finished lunch. Served with nice little pots of butter, jam and cream our scone was really good. Just a gnat’s whisker off topscone, however. Good try though and we thoroughly enjoyed looking round the rest of the shop. Worth a visit if you find yourself in this neck of the woods.

What with the final section of the Queensferry Crossing being put in place as we write, ‘bridges’ seem to be the talking point of the day. Just down the road from where we are in Crieff, Dollerie House has a crooked bridge within its grounds specifically designed to stop witches crossing. And continuing with the bridge/witch theme, Theresa May’s offer to become a bridge between Donald Trump’s USA and the EU, has been roundly rejected by the EU. Best laid plans and all that. Maybe she will try holding Putin’s hand next?

Statistics

With Trump’s travel ban on Islamic immigrants now in place it is also interesting to look at the official US fatality figures for the past year. Exactly 2 Americans were killed by Islamic immigrants. This compared to 21 killed by armed toddlers and 11,737 killed by other Americans. You have to think seriously about whether or not we want a bridge at all? Seems like a different world to the one at The Loft and Valentines of Crieff. Long may they prosper.

PH7 4DL tel: 01764 650008 The Loft

Scones, Top

Fonab Castle (revisited)

18 January 2017 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

As you are probably aware, we have long asserted that, in our humble opinion, the best scone in the world lives at Fonab Castle Hotel in Pitlochry. Since our first Fonab cream tea experience we have devoted much time and effort, not to mention expense, looking for a worthy challenger. However, in spite of all our testing at places as far apart as Ackergill Tower in Wick and Claridge’s in London, Fonab has managed to hold on to its position. It is on the top tier of the cake stand as the topmost topscone.

However, it is now almost two years since we made that rather bold assertion. In our minds Fonab shone like a beacon in terms of ambience, presentation, service and quality. Okay it’s not the cheapest. It’s one of these “you know you’re worth it” places. But … perhaps, after such a long period of time, our combined memories were playing tricks on us? Something that, in our advancing years, is not only possible but highly likely! Maybe the scones would be awful and we would have to find a new benchmark …. aaarrgghh!

So it was with more than a little trepidation that we decided to return and reassess the Fonab scone. Luckily we could still remember the location of Pitlochry.

Winter view across Loch Faskally from Fonab Castle, Pitlochry — View across Loch Faskally towards Ben Vrackie from Fonab

Warm bowls

The trepidation was caused by fear of disappointment. What if there was a new chef with a different recipe. What if they were just different? You may remember that, on one visit, we actually asked the chef what his secret ingredient was for a good scone. The answer – “happiness in the kitchen!” Well, we need not have worried! This time around the service was impeccable, the ambience relaxing and comfortable, the views superb, the range of Scottish jams just brilliant, the coffee fantastic. And the scones were just perfect … warm and light as a feather. Not only were they presented in beautiful white linen napkins but even the serving bowls had been warmed. This is how scones should be treated!
So just to be clear. Let this be a clarion call to every posh hotel, coffee shop, tea house and greasy spoon we visit on our travels. When you see us coming this is what we expect if you are to have any chance of dislodging the Fonab scone from the pinnacle of sconiness. At just under £11 for a cream tea, it may be expensive but it is soooo worth it! Not only that but it turns out that the chef we spoke to about ingredients has long gone. And yet the scones were still delicious. There must be a lot of happiness in that kitchen!

Taking control

Such scrumptiousness lulls you into a warm sconey world where the trials and tribulations of a mad Trump/May/Putin world seem far far away. With the PM delivering a speech on Brexit yesterday that completely ignores the wishes of us folks north of the border, it also clarifies the situation. Scotland is going nowhere until it takes control of its own affairs. Oh dear, sconey world is so much nicer. … if only we could stay for ever?

PH16 5ND tel: 01796 470140 Fonab Castle Hotel and Spa

Useful link: things to do in Pitlochry

Scones, Top

The Woodhouse

30 November 2016 billpaterson1@me.com 2 Comments

For those of you who know the tiny community of Kinlochard, here’s a question. What would a group of fifty Russians and Greeks be doing in the village? While you are cogitating let us tell you why we are here. As if our Trossachs correspondents don’t do enough, scouring places like Gibraltar and Lithuania for scones, they very kindly invited us to a ‘Scottish night’ at the village hall. They have already had very successful Indian and Italian nights. What a night it was! Excellent Scottish themed food and drink, and even better company.

Just walking the half mile from the house to the hall was exciting. Us townies tend to forget what ‘dark’ means until you are in a place like this. It’s dark! Goodness knows how Rob Roy and his merry band got around without iPhone torches! Unlike larger towns and cities, little places like Kinlochard certainly know how to generate community spirit. And it’s a really nice experience. There were no Russians or Greeks at our night however.

View across Loch Ard with Ben Lomond in the distance — Loch Ard with Ben Lomond in the distance

The Moss

The next day was beautiful. After a wee walk round the village we had to head for home but decided to visit Flanders Moss on the way. Having attended a fascinating Scottish Wildlife Trust talk about the Moss the previous week we thought we should check it out. Again, it is one of these places that you know of as one of Scotland’s chief defences against the English in times gone by and as a place you drive past frequently. Not as a place you actually ever visit.

View from the viewing tower at Flanders Moss — part of Flanders Moss with Ben Lomond on the left and Ben Ledi on the right

Strictly Come Sconing

It’s a designated National Nature Reserve and now it has a magnificent high viewing platform that provides a brilliant vantage point looking out towards Aberfoyle and the Lake of Menteith. Don’t think there is any connection with Flanders in Belgium. The name seems to be a corruption of an old gaelic word. On the edge of the Moss near to Kippen you come to The Woodhouse. Another of these café farm shops that seem to be popping up everywhere. You would think there would be a cut-off point where there were too many and they would become unsustainable? Not yet, they all seem to be really busy and

The Woodhouse is no exception. After our walk, lunch was definitely order of the day however there was no way we could pass up the chance of a scone test so that you, dear sconeys, can know that on your own visit to Flanders Moss it is safe to come here for sustenance. The things we do!

They are quite big so we decided to share one between the four of us … one of the biggest testing panels we have ever assembled. A sort of scone version of Strictly. The tea and scone was presented beautifully with an eclectic range of crockery. And with locally produced butter and cream as well as homemade strawberry jam – four 10s so far. Taste was excellent as well so, without too much deliberation it was declared a topscone. Well done The Woodhouse!

St Andrews day

Oh yes, the Russians and Greeks! They were in Kinlochard for a St Andrew’s night dinner … St Andrew, of course, being the patron saint of Russia and Greece as well as Scotland … but you all knew that! Quite why they should find themselves in Kinlochard however is still a bit of a mystery. Earlier today, St Andrew’s Day, the Prime Minister made a speech saying how proud she was of everything Scottish (the oil price is soaring) while simultaneously Angus Robertson was jeered for wishing the Commons a happy St Andrew’s day. Just have a great day everyone!

FK8 3JA tel: 01786 870156 The Woodhouse FB

foreign, Scones, Uncategorized

United Scones of America

15 July 2016 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

Hooray, our North American correspondents have been in touch … a photo of some American scones. Now we have to admit that we thought scones were a measure of a civilized, cultured society. So what on earth were they doing in the USA? The photo concentrates on Wegmans products (based in Rochester NY) which seems to be the Greggs of the US.

You would imagine that American scones would be slightly vulgar. At least three times the size of a good scone but these ones look fairly normal … though it’s quite hard to tell. If they haven’t gone ‘large’ then Wegmans, in typical American, ‘land of plenty’ style, certainly make up for it in variety. Maple walnut scones; organic cranberry scones; cinnamon scones; caramel toffee scones; chocolate chip scones; pumpkin scones; lemon poppy scones; coconut mac choc dip scones; orange cranberry scones; vanilla bean scones, to name but a few … phew!

At this point we would have liked to have launched into a diatribe about what a mess the US is in and what a mess it makes of the whole world. However, we find the moral high ground at the moment, on this side of the pond, is not as nearly as high as it used to be. The UK cannot exactly stand up as a shining example of anything at the moment .. scones excepted. We have just got a new prime minister who absolutely nobody voted for and she has just announced her cabinet. What could possible go right? This morning we hear that Nice, where a large and much loved part of our family live, is in trouble.

Unbelievably, that confection called the Hotel Negresco, where we once spent a wonderful night of pampered luxury, has been converted into a makeshift hospital. It is catering for the numerous casualties of a terrorist atrocity. Can this be laid at the door of the US? We don’t know. However, the long awaited, detailed and forensic Chilcot Report, has exposed the US, ably assisted by the UK, as the bully boys of the world. So perhaps it can. When the US describes itself as the ‘land of plenty’, it’s just a pity it’s usually somebody else’s plenty. Many thanks to R&K for the photo, keep up the good work.

NY 14603-0844 Wegmans Food Market

Scones, history and a dollop of politics