Tag Archives: Robert Burns

The Lobster Pot

18 December 2019 billpaterson1@me.com 6 Comments

Although Blackness is not far from home we haven’t visited much in the past ten years. Why? Because the pub closed down and it’s a dead end road so there was nowhere to go when you got here. You could go for a walk, visit the castle but that was about all. It was tragic because Blackness itself is lovely with a nice beach and a nice castle but it needed the pub.

Blackness Castle on a December day — Blackness Castle in December

However, our doughty Trossachs correspondents tipped us off that the pub had reopened and was worth a visit. And they weren’t wrong.

A brisk day

First though a little bit about the castle that has stood here for over 500 years. Sometimes known as the Ship That Never Sailed because, from the seaward side it looks like a great battleship. When German submarine U-21 ventured up the River Forth in 1914 that’s what they thought they saw when they raised their periscope. They decided to venture no further. Having walked along to the castle on what might be best described as a brisk day, we were in need of sustenance.

When you enter the Lobster Pot the sign above the door “We’re All Doomed” gives a hint of what’s to follow. The interior is lovely and warm with a very welcome open fire at one end. It is a bar/restaurant which also incorporates “The Wee Shop”. You can buy your loaf, your cornflakes, your pint and have a meal all in the same place … brilliant! There is a veritable cornucopia of paraphernalia virtually everywhere you look. On the ceiling directly above our table was this lifebelt. In the unlikely event of us ever going on a cruise, we want two of these please.

Who needs cream?

The Lobster Pot has only been open since August and it must be a welcome return for the village. All the staff were very friendly and soon had us sorted with some lunch and a couple of fruit scones. Initially they said that cream was no problem but later said that it was. Not to worry butter and jam would do just fine … we can rough it!

The scones and tea arrived after a perfect lunch. Unfortunately they did not live up to the standards we had already come to expect of the place. Enjoyable enough but just a tad on the stodgy side. The jam was from England and the butter from Ireland … what can we say? Nevertheless, the Lobster Pot is an excellent pub and we will be visiting Blackness much more often as a result. We hope it goes from strength to strength.

When Robert Burns was visiting the area in 1787 he had been obliged to leave nearby Bo’ness after calling it “That dirty ugly place Barrowstounnes” . He sought refuge here and was duly impressed because he wrote this poem “Blackness Is Braw” (Blackness is Superduper). Perhaps it was the ladies bathing in the mineral rich sediment of Blackness Bay (they still do it) that impressed him most. He always had an eye for the ladies after all!

This vintage photo of Blackness fishermen in 1919 was hanging on the wall. Amongst them there’s Ewan ‘Muffy’ McLachlan, George ‘Rasher’ Redmond, ‘Raving Ross’ Rintoul, ‘Mad Jack’ Melville and ‘Dark Drew’ Storer. It could easily be mistaken for a modern day picture of Boris’s new Conservative cabinet. We think, however, that we would rather be governed by ‘Mad Jack’ and his crew.

Help, please!

Before we leave the Lobster Pot perhaps you could help us with this? Close to where we were seated was this little boxed diorama. As you will be aware a diorama is a three-dimensional scene used to creatively express learning. However, we were stumped by this. What were we supposed to learn? It contains a fisherman pointing at a cooked lobster on top of a creel, five bottles of Guinness, a terrier dog wearing wellington boots and a large snake wound around a naked lady. There is some deep meaning here but we are perplexed. Perhaps some readers may have a greater insight?

No more scones until 2020 so while you are pondering naked ladies, snakes and lobsters may we take this opportunity to wish you all a very merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New Year. Many thanks for your indulgence during the past year.

EH49 7NL tel: 01506 830086 Lobster Pot

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island, Ordinary, Scones

Harris Hotel

26 March 2019 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

We landed safely at Tarbert on the Isle of Harris after a relatively uneventful voyage. Many years ago I did a similar crossing from Lochmaddy to Uig and was incredibly sea sick. Thankfully all the ships nowadays are fitted with stabilisers making for much smoother crossings. This was to be our first visit to this part of the Outer Hebrides so we were like excited children.

One of many beaches on the Isle of Harris — One of many beaches

Our first day was spent driving round South Harris to places like Rodel and Leverburgh. If Pat was hoping that we had left hair raising roads behind on Raasay she was to be disappointed. Nearly all the roads here are single track and they wind up and down and round about in dizzying fashion. However, if like us you are in no rush it can make for very pleasant driving. You just pull in and let any traffic past. We hardly had any traffic though in the warmer months it might be a different story. By way of compensation for Pat there were golden eagles everywhere. “It’s just a golden eagle” was often the reposte to my “what’s that?”

There are lots of galleries and craft places here and some were actually open. This one, the Mission House Studio at Finsbay was fabulous. It’s run by Beka (fine art photographer) and Nickolai Globe (ceramic artist). Their stuff was so good we actually parted with some cash! Yes, that good!!

Ruling classes

When we got back to Tarbert where we were staying, the Harris Hotel was just a couple of hunderd yards down the road. Would they have scones? It’s a very pleasant place built in 1865 by the Earl of Dunmore. We thought it was interesting to look at past owners. Obviously there was the original Earl followed by Sir Edward Scott, followed by Lord Leverhulme, followed by Sir Tom Sopworth and then Lord Brockett. Do you notice a theme running through these names? All from the tax avoiding ruling classes. We are grateful to our Ballachulish correspondent who sent us pictures of some creative placards from the recent anti-Brexit march in London. One million people attended. They certainly sum up how we feel and emphasis the point that toffs really are terribly terribly unsuited to government … golly gosh, yes!

Today the headlines read “MPs seize control!” which makes us think “the lunatics have taken over the asylum!“. Every time we think it can’t get any worse, it does. Let’s hope those one million marchers have some effect.

Doubts creep in

Nowadays they are not at all fussy who they let into the hotel … our presence being proof of exactly that. Warmly welcomed, we were still recovering from the worst of the effects of the fresh air when a couple of warm scones were placed in front of us. Just sitting there looking out over the gardens was pleasant enough in itself and our lovely scones did nothing to detract from the cosy illusion that all was well with the world. Not topscones but we thoroughly enjoyed them nevertheless. Some time back, when we were on the Orkneys, after a run of topscones, we developed a theory that the further north you went the better the scones got. We are starting to have doubts. None so far on this trip.

Vandals

In one of the corridors they have a display case containing an old window from the hotel’s dining room. It’s there because in 1912, J M Barrie of Peter Pan fame scratched his initials in the glass. Must have been a fashionable thing to do at one time. He joins a list of illustrious artistes like Robert Burns who vandalised windows all over the place.

Honesty

We are letting you see this picture of Croft 36 because, for us, it seemed to sum up life on the Isle of Harris. It’s a café shack at the side of a little road on South Harris near Northton. Inside there’s a cauldron of scotch broth, hot pies and quiches, patisserie style baking including scones … and a price list. You just help yourself to whatever takes your fancy. There’s no one there, just an honesty box .. fantastic. In hindsight we should have bought some scones but they only came in packets of four so we didn’t. Stupid, they might have been topscones!

HS3 3DL tel: 01859 502154 Harris

ps: Telephone boxes in this part of the world seem to be located either in people’s gardens or other places difficult to get to. Perhaps it’s testament to the strength of the winds they get up here that this one at Finsbay had lost its door. It wasn’t operational but it had been manufactured at the Saracen foundry in Glasgow.

Ordinary, Scones

Star & Garter Hotel

15 February 2019 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

Scotland’s national poet, Robert Burns, was born 1759 in the Ayrshire town of Alloway. The same year also saw the birth of this place, in the West Lothian town of Linlithgow. At that time it was the home of the wealthy Boyd family of ship owners. By the 1847, however, it had been transformed into a coaching inn, the Star & Garter, under the ownership of James Burleigh. At that time it was the Avis or Hertz of its day, hiring out horses and carriages. It’s right beside the station which is handy for us. While our car is being serviced in Bo’ness we can jump on a train and the garage picks us up from here. On some previous occasions, you may remember, they have picked us up at the Black Bitch.

Having a little time to spare, however, our attention was drawn towards the possibility of a scone. When we asked we were informed by a nice young man that tea and coffee were no problem. However, if we wanted a scone we would have to wait until he baked one. You will agree, it would have been rude and churlish to turn him down on such an offer.

What’s in a name?

There are loads of pubs in Britain bearing the Star & Garter name. How come? As far as we can ascertain the Garter bit comes from the Order of the Garter. In 1344, Edward III decided to admit some of his knights to the Order of the Garter to make them feel a bit special among all these other common-or-garden knights. A bribe, in other words, for extra loyalty. The medals accompanying these awards usually came in the form of stars. Presumably the phrase “star and garter” began to be used to denote something a bit special. Would our scone be worthy of such an accolade?

Promising start

We were sitting by an open log fire waiting for them to be baked so no great hardship there. Although we had our tea and coffee, waiting like this does heighten the sense of anticipation. Suffice to say, by the time they arrived we were ready! Having just come from the oven they were wonderfully warm, and although there was no cream there was plenty of jam and butter. First bite was very promising however as we progressed we decided that they had just been slightly over baked. We like them slightly crunchy on the outside but these were more ‘hard’. Had it not been for that they could have merited a topscone but sadly it was not to be.

Honoured

However, sitting here by the fire in February with a slightly hard scone is still very enjoyable. We always feel honoured when folk offer to bake scones specially for us. Not as honoured as a knight of the realm you understand and certainly not as much as a gartered one, but honoured nevertheless.

Bribes

It is incredible that the government was defeated yet again last night and it doesn’t seem to make the slightest bit of difference. Why do they bother with all that palaver? Theresa May, never mind she cannot even command her own government, sets off to Brussels in another futile attempt to browbeat the EU into some sort of submission. It really takes some believing. Perhaps she is going with a bundle of stars and garters in her handbag. She has bribed everyone else so it may be worth a try.

A Parcel of Rogues

When Robert Burns wrote ‘Such A Parcel Of Rogues In A Nation’ he could easily have been referring to Brexit and the secretive ERG group of MPs. He wrote: “Is wrought now by a coward few, For hireling traitor’s wages”.Though he could just as easily aimed it at MPs in the Labour party who will go with anything just to keep their jobs.

EH49 7AB tel: 01506 845647 Star & Garter

ps. Honours should really go to our N.Ireland correspondents who, on a wee trip to Venice, diligently set about searching for a scone. Not easy in such an uncultured place however they did manage to find scone approximations. Apparently these items are only made at Carnavale time. This year that runs from 16th Feb to 5th March so we are doubly honoured to be seeing such rare Italian sconey things. They didn’t say how they tasted however .. more training required!

As always, many thanks to all our correspondents.

Ordinary, Scones

The Kenmore Hotel

14 March 2016 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

Oh dear, here we go again … scone 101. First of all, apologies for this rather lengthy preamble. However, it is necessary to let you know how we came to be here, at the Kenmore Hotel, especially since we never had any intention of coming here in the first place. It’s great to get feedback from readers, a major part of the fun of a blog like this. One reader in particular always comes back with lots of comments and information on all sorts of things.

Not so much a scone correspondent, more of an informant … the ‘Stenhousemuir mole’. After our review of the Iron Goddess of Mercy tea at Claridges the ‘mole’ informed us about the Dorchester Hotel where you can get Scottish grown tea at £10 a cup. He commanded us to go and try it. Bearing in mind that most of what emanates from the ‘mole’ could be classed as ‘brain farts’, there initially seemed no reason to think that this snippet would be any different. Tea grown in Scotland??

Best tea in the world

Upon investigation however it turned out that this little gem was in fact accurate and, not only that, the tea was from Amulree. It had won ‘best tea in the world’ at the recent World Tea Championships in Paris. Surely not, how can that be? Those of you who are familiar with Amulree can be forgiven for being slightly incredulous. For those who aren’t familiar, Amulree is 750m above sea level and consists of a hotel (currently defunct) and a couple of houses surrounded by miles of open bare hillside. Even bracken struggles! Sconeys should know about tea as well as scones, particularly if the best tea in the world is grown in Scotland. Further investigation was obviously going to be necessary.

So off we went, determined to witness this spectacle for ourselves. We felt so sure we would recognise a tea plantation when we saw one (seen them on the telly). We didn’t bother trying to pin down the exact location before leaving home .. mistake. On arrival in the village we thought, if there was any tea growing going on, it would be down the Glen Quaich road on the slightly lower ground around Loch Freuchie. But there was no sign, and as we headed further down the glen on a GWR (great wee road) we eventually ended up in the lovely village of Kenmore without seeing hide nor hair of a tea plantation .. zilch!

Poets bar with Burns' poem above the fire — Poets bar with Burns’ poem above the fire

Mystified and ever so slightly scunnered we headed for the hotel. Perhaps they would be able to shed some light on local tea growing activities?

Poetry

The hotel is a mixture of old and new. The bar area, called Poet’s Bar, has become a place of pilgrimage for enthusiasts of Robert Burns. On a visit on 29th August 1787 he wrote a poem in pencil on the chimney breast and it is still there exactly as written. Though it’s now protected by a sheet of glass. At the back of the hotel there is a much glitzier restaurant with fabulous views over the river Tay. Our scones were nicely presented on a slate-like piece of wood with jam and a tub of cream topped of with a strawberry, very pretty! The scones, however, had a slightly dry sawdusty texture which was disappointing.

We’re not going to pretend that sitting by a toasty log fire drinking excellent coffee and eating scones was any kind of hardship. Quite the opposite. Could have sat there all day. However, we were still no nearer to achieving our mission so we had to press on .. duty called! The serving staff were all eastern european so we thought we would ask the lady at reception about Dalreoch. She was from Paris and had never even heard of the tea tasting championships .. goodness. What self respecting Parisian does not know about the tea championships? The local post-master had heard rumours of tea being grown locally but had no idea where.

By this time we were seriously beginning to doubt the veracity of the mole’s info. We were beginning to wonder if we were on a wild goose chase. Suffice to say that, after a 12 mile return journey via Aberfeldy we did eventually find it.

Civilising tea

Nowadays you are almost tempted to look nostalgically at bygone times. A time when conflicts could be resolved by a chap wearing jodhpurs and drinking a civilising cup of tea. We doubt if even world beating Scottish tea is sufficient to beat some sort of order into the mess the world seems to find itself in … pity.

PH15 2NU tel: 01887 830205 Kenmore Hotel, Kenmore

Scones, history and a dollop of politics