Tag Archives: New Year

Scones, Uncategorized

Skillingsboller

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2020 wasn’t exactly a year to remember what with plague ravaging the country and mad politicians reaching new levels of lunacy. These things are mere trifles, however, when we tell you that the government has now told us to cease all sconological research forthwith! Sacre bleu! Okay, they didn’t actually get in touch with us specifically and tell us to desist  but they may as well.  Current COVID restrictions mean that we are not supposed to leave home except to care for others. We thought sconology fitted that brief perfectly but apparently, it doesn’t!  So, in order to further your knowledge and broaden your cultural horizons we bring you skillingsboller … a sort of Norwegian scone equivalent.

Happy New Year

But first we would like to wish a happy new year to all our readers and correspondents, we hope that 2021 is much better than the past year. 2020 was memorable for having absolutely nothing whatsoever to commend it. A complete disaster. It did, however, serve to demonstrate the difference between the EU and the UK.

The ‘U’ stands for ‘Unity’ in both their names but the five years of negotiations combined with coronavirus have had opposite effects in both states. On one hand the 27 countries of the EU showing admirable unity with a show of democracy in action. On the other hand the totally undemocratic UK falling apart at the seams with it’s ‘Unity’ under unprecedented strain.  All seventeen of the most recent opinion polls showing a clear majority in favour of Scottish independence and N.Ireland, is now left  closer to Dublin than London. Even England’s long-standing bedfellow, Wales, is getting fed up up with the Boris shambles and Westminster’s inane dictatorial style. And lo-and-behold, on top of all that we now have part of the Tory party launching a campaign to rejoin the EU. Aaargh! As messes go, this is pretty messy.

Coffee and boller

Enough of all that! Thanks to a Viking son-in-law we used to spend a lot of time in Norway. Being there was fantastic but of course there were no scones. They did however have boller (pronounced ‘bolly’) which are to Norwegians what croissants are to the French or scones are to the Brits. They are made with cardamon spice and can often have raisins or even chocolate chips in them. Absolutely delicious. We became addicted and ‘coffee and boller’ quickly became part of the daily routine.

On this occasion, being at home without access to boller or scones of any kind, we decided to make skillingsboller. It’s a derivative of boller,  a kind of cinnamon bun. Obviously you need a recipe but you also need the help of one big Viking and two small ones. This may be a problem for most folks but not for us … because we are blessed with all three!

rolling out the boller mixture

Don’t make skillingsoller if you are in a hurry. It’s not something you can rush. It takes 2-3 hours at least. But then, why would you be in a rush when you can’t even leave home? Get baking! Be warned though, if you decide to utilise the two small Vikings it can take even longer. Particularly at the icing stage!

Suffice to say that the resulting skillingsboller was absolutely delicious, a major triumph for all concerned.

What do you want?

Emboldened by success our Vikings then went on to make normal boller. holemade Norwegian bollerDon’t they look delish! If you can’t be bothered making them you can always visit United Bakeries in Oslo. There, you will find lots of boller of all kinds and a huge bowl of strawberry jam that you just help yourself to. Ah, memories! Boller is not a scone but if 2020 taught us anything it was that sometimes we can’t have everything we want. Hopefully in the not too distant future we will all have the ability to travel again and get what we want, what we really really want … sorry! Until then stay safe  wherever you are!

Ordinary, Scones

The Fork & Mustard

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Confusion

Joyous news, this may be the last scone you have to endure this year. Of course, it’s also an opportunity for us to wish everyone a Merry Christmas but first perhaps we can enlist your help. We are confused! “No surprise there”, we hear you say.

You probably think it’s Brexit, but it’s not! Brexit’s not confusing, its just stupid. No, it’s because we are bombarded with adverts on TV asking us to send £3 to save a child or a donkey somewhere. Plus the news that 600 homeless people have died in mega rich England this year. Okay, you agree, that’s pretty awful, but what’s confusing about it?

Well, while we may feel guilty about all that, we simultaneously pay, ‘The Chosen One’,  the imbecilic Jose Mourinho £18m per season to manage Manchester United badly. Then we fork out an additional £15m just to see him off the premises. Little wonder he has spent the last two and a half years living in a five star hotel. You might say that we don’t actually pay him but of course, in reality, we do, albeit indirectly. Why do we, as a society, do that? That’s what’s confusing!

Are we completely blind to donkeys and homeless people when we would rather pay a complete idiot ludicrous amounts of money for doing something which is of no importance whatsoever? If £3 saves a donkey, get it to do the job! We’re certain Man U would do just as well … or badly. However, we don’t want to worry you just before Christmas so we have come up with an answer of our own.

Andy Murray and Tiger Woods

A tea cosy at the Fork & Mustard Café, Falkirk
Fork & Mustard tea cosyt

The world’s New Year resolution for 2019 should be to completely eradicate all professional sport … simple! It only brings out the worst in folk and we think the world would be a much happier place without any of it. Precisely nothing would be lost. Except maybe the Andy Murrays and Tiger Woods with their entourages of physiotherapists, doctors, dietitians and psychiatrists. But that’s not really sport, it’s cheating! Tennis, golf and the like would still be played, still be televised and be even more exciting. Anyway, you will no doubt be delighted to hear that that’s our pre-Christmas rant over. Interior view of the Fork & Mustard Café, Falkirk

Tasmanian waiters at the Fork & Mustard

While we were pondering which ridiculous high paid job Jose would end up in next we arrived here, at the Fork & Mustard. In keeping with the ever changing face of Falkirk, up until a year ago this place was called Shy Violet. The lady who welcomed us had one of those super bubbly personalities you immediately warm to. When we asked how she came by the name ‘Fork & Mustard’ we got a fairly lengthy tale about an Italian waiter in Tasmania who kept misunderstanding what was being said to him. He thought he was being asked for a ‘fork and mustard’ whereas they were actually saying unkind things involving sweary words that we couldn’t possibly repeat here. Suffice to say this Fork & Mustard is unique. The only one in the world.

Sweetness

They have the modern necessity, a vegan and gluten free menu. Novel teapot at the Fork & Mustard Café, FalkirkWe actually have some sympathy with the guy who killed the cow because it was eating the vegan’s food. Most things are made on the premises. Some from hand me down family recipes “just like granny used to make.” How would granny’s scones be? A scone at the Fork & Mustard Café, FalkirkWhen Pat’s tea came it was in a rather novel glass teapot that automatically drained and filtered the tea leaves when it was placed on top of the cup. And we thought we had seen everything! Our scone was very good, packed with fruit but we felt that granny had put in a little bit too much sugar for our taste. No topscone but we enjoyed this place very much. It had a great atmosphere, created entirely by the super helpful staff. We will be back.

Open goals

Another thing we are confused about. How does the Labour party manage to make such a mess of opposition? The Tories have given them sooo many open goals. Okay, no one has any idea what they stand for. And, of course, they have shot themselves in the foot so often they should be referred to a self-harming clinic. But apart from that? It’s very confusing! In Tasmania they would probably refer to Corbyn as a useless ‘fork & mustard’.

Merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New Year to all our readers.

FK1 1HX         tel: 01324 637 374      The Fork and Mustard

Ordinary, Scones

The Bothy Bistro

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You can tell by the signs above the door “Afa Fine Coffee,  Fancy Pieces and Hamely Fare” that we are quite far from home. We are, in fact, in Burghead on the Moray Firth at one of our all time favourite cafés, The Bothy Bistro. Why, we hear you ask, would you be in Burghead in the middle of January? Surely it’s not just for a scone? Well, believe it or not, it is actually all down to Pope Gregory XIII. In 1582 he decided that a new calendar was needed to better reflect the actuality of astronomical events. Hence the Gregorian calendar we use today.

It seems however that no one told the good folks of Burghead who still use the old Julian calendar. Soooo, having thoroughly enjoyed our own New Year celebrations, but being a bit down about having to wait twelve months for another bash, we decided that we would come here where you only have to wait eleven days. Their New Year is on the 11th January every year and is celebrated in some style with the Burning of the Clavie. Click on the image below to get a wee flavour.

Burning the Clavie on Doorie Hill, Burghead
These guys are not warming scones up

Health and Safety

Where else would you find a thousand people out at night in rain, freezing temperatures and  gale force winds that would cut you in half, thoroughly enjoying themselves? Definitive proof that “there is no such thing as bad weather, just the wrong clothes”. Burning the Clavie, BurgheadThey are a hardy lot in Burghead and we had a brilliant time following the Clavie and delivering embers to homes around the town to bring them luck for the following year. Eventually we ended up at the Clavie’s final resting place on top of Doorie Hill. Burghead is fortunate in having some sort of force field surrounding the town. It precludes health and safety officers from entering. Anywhere else, throwing buckets of petrol onto a burning barrel of tar in a 50mph wind on top of a steep hill with lots of people standing around, would raise a few eyebrows. Not in Burghead.

We felt priviledged to be able to share the fun and enjoy the hospitality of the local people. There is no food to buy in any of the local pubs and hotels  … it’s all free! We think the whole thing is best summed up in the words of poet Mary Harding:

“For all our science and technical skill,
We watch with hearts that hungry still
 Leap with a wild primeval thrill
At the leaping flames on the Doorie Hill”.

Strip the willow

The last time we were here we ended up doing a strip-the-willow in the main street with what seemed like the entire population of the town at 1.30am. Great fun! In spite of the best attentions of the Church and its strenuous efforts to have it banned this ritual has survived for centuries. Long may it continue! Internal view of The Bothy Bistro, Burghead

Burned like the clavie

But back to The Bothy Bistro! Burghead is fortunate indeed to have this place which could happily stand against opposition from many more sopLogo for The Bothy Bistro, Burgheadhisticated places in London and the like. Their bacon, marmalade and banana croissants are to die for and their exclusive range of wines is second to none. The scones, however, on this occasion seemed to have come out in sympathy with the Clavie itself … burnt! Bothy Bistro sconeDisappointingly, not a topscone. Everything else was fine and we enjoyed  being back here again but the scone was just too hard and too crunchy!

Probably no more scones before Trump takes up the US Presidency. Maybe no more after it either, the world might just be too weird. And that’s saying something after the 2016 we have just had. You get the feeling though that, in Burghead, they will just carry on regardless no matter what happens. Happy new year to all our readers … again!

IV30 5UE    tel: 01343 830006    The Bothy Bistro FB

Ordinary, Scones

Tea Jennys

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This is a lovely little cafe tucked away in Kings Court, just off the High Street in Falkirk. Originally called Kings Arms Court, any hostelry of that name has long since vanished into the mists of time. It is great to see establishments like Tea Jennys thriving in spite of the tax avoiding multinationals like Starbucks, Costa and Caffé Nero snapping up all the prime sites in town.  Of course, as we reported in an earlier post some places could do with taking a leaf out of the multinationals book. Because, aside from the tax stuff which isn’t really their fault, they really do know their business. You get the feeling though that Tea Jennys, has probably looked closely at what the multinationals are doing, noted it, then decided to take an alternative approach. It does everything the big boys do but just does it differently.

tea and tea cosies at Tea Jennies, falkirk
tea and tea cosies

 

The meals, cakes and scones are home made for a start, all excellent, but it is the other little touches that set it apart. The home-knitted tea cosys, a different one for each teapot. There was a santa hat and a christmas pudding on ours. No tea bags here either, the tea is proper leaf tea served in proper tea pots, in proper tea cups with a proper tea strainer. The decor is a bit chintzy .. but different. Certainly not like any multinational that we have visited. The service is warm and friendly. Unfortunately when we visited they only had cheese scones left. Equally unfortunately they forgot about the scones in our order.

Prospering

A gentle reminder, however, brought profuse apologies .. and our scones, nicely toasted. scones at Tea Jennys, FalkirkNot topscones but very good, we may have to come back earlier in the day to catch a plain or a fruit scone. Something to look forward to next year. It’s not as if Tea Jennys is simply holding its own against the multinational competition it appears to be thriving. They recently opened a deli and an additional cafe further along the street. Long may they continue to prosper. Internal view of Tea Jennys, Falkirk

Here’s to 2016

This is probably our last scone of 2015. It only leaves us to wish all our readers a very merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. And thank you for all the support and enthusiasm throughout the year. Here’s to 2016, may all your scones be topscones.

FK1 1PG               tel: 01324 228185             Tea Jennys TA