Michel Barnier Archives - Scones, history and a dollop of politics

At the end of an alleyway in Linlithgow there is this little plaque, about 15cms in diameter. It’s a depiction of Linlithgow’s town motto – ‘St Michael is Kind to Strangers’. A bit odd, you might think, as a town motto. However, St Michael, in his main role as chief opponent of Satan, seems to have been a general all round good guy. Probably still best known as the patron saint of Marks & Spencers, he was also written about in both the Old and New Testaments, the Hebrew bible and the Quran. And, apparently he still looks after the inhabitants of this town and its strangers to this very day. So that’ll be us then!

Love affair

Would he be kind enough to help us find a decent scone? The alleyway was leading us in a definite direction so perhaps his hand was upon us? Actually, after our recent afternoon tea at One Devonshire, we could have had another here at Mason Belles were it not for the fact that we just walked in off the street without any advanced notice. Not that we could have given them much notice anyway. It’s only a few days since they opened their doors to the public. Formerly called Livingstone’s, one of our favourite restaurants, until it closed a year or so ago. We could just hop on the train for the ten minute ride from Falkirk and voila, we were here! Livingstone’s was also responsible for introducing us to Angus the Bull cabernet sauvignon. An ongoing love affair … but that’s all history.

Now it has been reincarnated by Linsey Scott, a delightful lady with many years experience in some of Scotland’s best restaurants. Mason Belles Kitchen is her first venture on her own. It is set well off the street in a garden area which is usually alive with squirrels, rabbits and birds but today it was quiet. Probably because the animals had more sense than us, coming out in the rain. Inside though, not only was it dry but warm and welcoming as well.

Rather randomly, the first people we met were old work colleagues we hadn’t seen in ages … brill! The girl looking after us had fairly obviously only been in the job for a few days, or maybe even a few hours. She had to go off and seek answers to all our questions but she did it beautifully. Turned out they only had plain scones so that simplified decision making immensely. Our friends ended up with strawberry scones … scones preloaded with cream and slices of fresh strawberry. It wasn’t what they had asked for but, since they looked so nice, they just accepted and enjoyed them nevertheless.

Divine help

We tend to like quite small scones and these fitted the bill perfectly. Small but delicious and accompanied by fabulous blackcurrant jam and a lovely copper pot of cream. The coffee was excellent as well. Another special blend from our favourite coffee company, Henry’s. What more could we ask for? St Michael had indeed been extremely kind, not only finding our long lost friends, but a topscone as well! With divine help like this, Linsey and her team can’t help but flourish.

Interior view of Mason Belles Kitchen, Linlithgow — Part of the dining room

Obviously the main church in town is St Michael’s, where Mary Queen of Scots was christened. It had been around since 1138 as a Catholic church but shortly after the christening it was ransacked by Protestants. They eventually repaired the church and have used it as their own ever since. The Protestant church took their role as guardians of the town’s morality very seriously.

Repeatedly Eurupean

The church had a repentance stool on which transgressors guilty of drunkeness, adultery or whistling would have to sit in full view of the entire congregation. Repeat offenders were chained by the neck at the church door. Oh, those were the days! We are pretty sure that Theresa May would have Michel Barnier sat on the repentance stool for daring to defy the mighty United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Meanwhile Jean Claude Juncker’s neck would be in irons at the door … just for being repeatedly European! Theresa’s now gaining a pitying respect from the public who always like an underdog. As a kind of ‘billy no mates’ … watching her perform is kind of embarrassing. Like sitting by a guillotine of old, where you can’t bear to look but can’t help it either. She needs to get St Michael onside!EH49 7AE 01506 843867 Mason Belles FB

ps: JOGLE friends (John o’Groats to Land’s End) walkers and are nearing the end of their incredible journey. You can follow their adventures at: heatherstevesduncansbyheadtolandsend.wordpress.com

Have you have ever wondered how many Richmonds there are in the world? No?? Well, there are 56, so if anyone asks, now you know! In 2009 Richmond was voted best town in the UK but that was the one in North Yorkshire. The one we are in today, however, would probably be voted the wealthiest.

A glance in an estate agent’s window will provide you with several opportunities to rent a house for £30,000 a month … a month!! And if you get fed up sitting in your expensive house you can catch a ferry from here to Ham House or Hampton Court Palace and look at places that even you can’t afford. The town is also in an excellent state of repair. The 21,000 good people of Richmond just read about things like potholes if they unwittingly pick up a provincial newspaper. Potholes are not something they would ever have to actually experience for themselves.

View along river Thames at Richmond — Looking along the riverside from Tide Tables

Historically the town used to be called Sheen. It was here that the Commissioners of Scotland had to kneel before Edward I after William Wallace was executed in 1305. So how did it end up becoming yet another, common as muck, Richmond? Well, in 1501, when Henry VII built his new residence here, he called it Richmond Palace after his ancestral home, Richmond Castle, in ‘town of the year’ Richmond in North Yorkshire. After all, if you have a lot of castles, you cannot be expected to sit around all day dreaming up new names for all of them. Sheen Palace would have had a certain ‘gloss’ to it though! Anyway, the town that grew up here around Richmond Palace ended up adopting its name.

Lycra land

Having said that, it isn’t hard to see what attracted folk here in the first place. Set on a meander in the Thames, its a lovely place to stroll around if you have absolutely nothing better to do. Of course, that’s where we come in …itinerant scone munching vagrants. The riverside is particularly nice, it is always busy with cyclists and walkers. Down here you cannot simply put bicycle clips round your trousers and head off blithely on your bike. No, no, no, you have to be fully rigged out, top to tail, in multicoloured lycra so that you look exactly like a competitor in the Tour de France, even though you are only going to pick up a pint of milk. This rules applies no matter your body shape, giving rise to the acronym MAMILs … Middle Aged Man In Lycra.

You also need all the technology. A phone with a head set so that you can dictate notes for tomorrow’s meetings or chat to your auntie Jeanie while you pedal. The obligatory Fitbit is also required so that you can chart your progress to eternal life and body beautiful. The walkers aren’t much better! As befits a place where the people have oodles of choice, Tide Tables is a hip veggie and vegan café. It occupies an arch under Richmond bridge next to a boat builder but it also has a lovely outdoor seating area under giant plane trees. We were able to sit in the dappled sunlight and watch the riverside bustle while we ate our scones. If you can’t afford all that lycra you have no choice but to sit and watch?

Being alive

On a slightly different tack. You know how we are always bleating on about places that serve butter and cream from England when we are in Scotland, well down here the butter was from France … mon dieu! Mon dieu, as well for the cream, it was very strange, hard and crumbly. Probably because it had never been within a country mile of a cow. The scone itself was quite big and although it had a fair amount of fruit it just tasted okay. Nothing to write home about. So why are you wasting our time we hear you cry! Okay it wasn’t a topscone but the overall experience of sitting by the river in the sunshine watching everyone else putting so much effort into being alive was wonderfully relaxing. So we can, at least, recommend that.

Back to front

Sitting here you could possible believe that all was well in the world. Then you remember Brexit! Just why Michel Barnier doesn’t say to Theresa May ” look, the UK has always been a miserable grudging and small minded member of the EU … just close the door on the way out” is beyond us. Instead we have to listen to Theresa May saying that the EU must compromise if they want us to leave … eh, think you’ve got the wrong end of the stick, Theresa!

Extradition

And where is David Cameron who got us into this mess in the first place. Playing so fast and loose with the future of the country should be some sort of criminal offence. Presumably, therefore, he is somewhere like North Korea that doesn’t have an extradition treaty with the UK. More likely, however, that he is holed up somewhere in deepest Richmond.

TW9 1TH. tel: 020 8948 8285 Tide Tables Café

Scones, history and a dollop of politics

Tag Archives: Michel Barnier

Mason Belles Kitchen