Remember, in a recent post, we said we could do this entire blog without ever leaving Falkirk. Well, here we are again. This time it is AJ’s Café on the High Street. We’ve been here before in 2015 but back then it was called Roasted and Toasted and, for all sorts of reasons, we gave them a bit of a hard time. Would it have improved in the intervening years, that was the question?

So what was wrong the last time? Essentially we were annoyed that they were working very hard but ignoring the basics. That’s a dangerous game when all the big international coffee houses are on your doorstep. Particular grumbles were:

• Coffee tasted like it had been watered down
• The decor was ‘extreme bland’.
• Lighting unimaginative and lots of bulbs out.
• Nauseous lifestyle messages like “when it rains look for rainbows“
• Scones bought in from outside.
• Tables not cleared.
• Not taken the previous occupant’s name off the outside canopy.

We would love to report that it has been completely transformed but sadly no. We didn’t have any coffee but can only presume that it’s better than it was. The decor and lighting, unfortunately, was still dismal. The exact same lifestyle messages are still there and the same canopy is still there emblazoned with ‘Kaseys’ … that’s from before it was even Roasted and Toasted!??

Falkirk speak

On the upside, the tables were cleared and we got a lovely warm welcome … and, the scones were homebaked by Linda, the kitchen  lady.  We ordered some lunch but when we asked for a scone our waitress asked: “wid ye want it het up … or a cid toast it?” That’s broad Falkirk speak for ” Would you care for your scone to be gently warmed … or alternatively, lightly toasted?”. When we asked for a recommendation, without a moment’s hesitation, she said “Toasted“. The deal was done.

Value for money

After our lunch, our toasted scones were duly delivered. They didn’t have cream but there was English jam and Irish butter … argh! We wondered if Linda’s scones would be an improvement on our previous visit. Not only were they an improvement they were fantastic. In fact, had it not been for all the problems, this could have been an easy topscone. Shame. When we went to settle our bill it came to an unbelievable total of £7.20. No wonder they can’t afford to do the place up! At these prices, AJ’s Café may not be around much longer so if you fancy one of Linda’s great scones you had better get a move on!

In spite of many things being wrong In AJ’s Café we wish them all the best. Everyone was working very hard, what they lacked was a bit of business sense. Not a criticism, just an observation.

Goodie bags

At the Oscars, the judging panel obviously took the criticism of their lack of diversity to heart and decided to award the main gongs to Parasite. This is the first foreign language film ever to win anything in the ceremony’s 92 year history. We haven’t seen the South Korean film yet but it is, no doubt, thoroughly worthy of the recognition. Just like lots of other similar films that have been ignored in the past. Difficult though it is, perhaps Hollywood is, at last, trying to be less self congratulatory. If so, congratulations!. Maybe next time they could do away with the £175,000 goodie bags that all the nominees receive … or is that still a step too far in our unequal world? We think that AJ’s Café would gladly provide excellent goodie bags for the poor luvvies for under a tenner.

FK1 1EY       tel: 01324 228652         AJ’s

///torn.necks.chose