Tag Archives: Falkirk

Ordinary, Scones

Lucy’s

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Imagine for a moment that it’s the 18th century and you’re a farmer with a few cows on the Isle of Jura. Map of Craignish peninsulaThe cattle are ready for market but that’s in Falkirk, 150 miles away. What do you do?  It’s perfectly simple really. You walk the cattle up to the very north of the island past Barnhill, the cottage where George Orwell wrote “1984”. Then you swim them past the infamous Corryvreckan whirlpool to the Craignish peninsula on the mainland. And, had it been there in the 18th century, a further five mile walk would have taken you to Lucy’s cafe in the village of Ardfern. In many ways, Orwell’s dystopian vision in “1984” of rival dictatorships and Big Brother seems uncomfortably realistic these days.

Hardy

Of course, it probably wasn’t quite like that. The farmers would combine their animals into relatively large herds and maybe even use professional drovers for the long and arduous trek. Not sure that we would fancy crossing this stretch of water in a rowing boat at the best of times never mind with a whole lot of swimming cows tethered to it. They were hardy souls back then!Internal view of Lucy's at Ardfern

For being so off the beaten track, Ardfern is a really lively place with around 400 people calling it home. There’s a large marina and it’s popular with artists, writers and crafts people as well as several technology based industries.

Painting of Lucy's at Ardfern
Painting of Lucy’s with the local folk depicted as fairies

Lucy’s is similarly energetic and has a lovely vibe about it. The staff were very welcoming and we were delighted to see some scones  displayed on the counter … yeah!

Giant

A scone at Lucy's at ArdfernBefore our scone we decided on something savoury, a sausage roll! Goodness, when it arrived it was a giant, by far the biggest sausage roll we have ever come across! A delicious feast in itself but would we manage a scone as well? Of course we could! No cream but it came with plenty of jam and butter.  Freshly baked and just very nice. All in all, Lucy’s was a great place and an unexpected find in an unexpected place.

Pat at Dunned in 2012
Pat at Dunaad in 2012 and trying her right foot in the stone … perfect fit!

Craignish and the surrounding area may be isolated and remote by modern standards but it was once the centre of many people’s worlds. The nearby ancient hillfort of Dunadd was at the centre of the Gaelic kingdom of Dalriada. It stretched across the west coast of Scotland and Northern Ireland. From the 6th century, Kings were crowned here in a ceremony which involved them placing their right foot in a footprint carved into the rock. In 843, Kenneth McAlpin,  King of the Picts married into the Scots of Dalriada and became the first King of “Scotland”. All was peaceful from then on. Do you think we can find a nice Ukrainian princess for Putin to marry … or a Palestinian one for Netanyahu? Okay, it wasn’t a serious question.

PA31 8QN          tel: 01852 500781            Lucy’s 

///potential.branch.status

Scones, topbagnascone, topweird

Callendar House 3

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We’ve reviewed the scones at Callendar House twice before,  once in 2015 and again in 2017. With a seven year gap we thought readers  would be ready for an update.

Wall covering in Callendar House
Wall covering in the tearoom

Callendar House, which used to be owned by the Forbes family, lies about a hundred yards south of the Antonine Wall which the Romans built all the way across Scotland. It formed the northern edge of their Empire. The southern edge was bounded by Arabia and the Sahara desert. They regarded everything south of the Antonine Wall as “civilised” and everything north as “barbaric and more bother than it’s worth”. The Romans are long gone but that view hasn’t changed much over the intervening two millennia. FYI, our house lies on the civilised side … obviously!

Dangers of crinoline dresses

Actually, we just decided to take a walk round the small loch that lies to the east of the house. Something we hadn’t done in a long time. Back in the day, all grand houses had a loch of their own and it wasn’t simply a conceit on the part of the owners. In the absence of any kind of organised public fire fighting service a loch was seen as essential as a readily available water supply in the event of an inferno.

Probably not much use when people like Oliver Cromwell were deliberately trying to set fire to the place but even in peace times, conflagrations  were seen as relatively likely given the number of ladies in crinoline dresses swishing about in front of open fires under a multitude of candelabras. Of course, even if you had your own loch, it would still have been difficult if there was only you and a bucket. You needed servants and lots of them but, of course, that wasn’t a problem for the aristocracy.

Gentrification

If you’ve ever had ambitions, or even just wondered how to become an aristocrat perhaps we can help.  Back in 1783 Callendar House and the Estate that encompassed most of Falkirk was being sold by auction. The Earl of Errol (an oven ready aristocrat) had high ambitions at the auction but was eventually outbid by an upstart scrap merchant, one William Forbes, from Aberdeen. Eyebrows were raised. Not only that, in true scrap merchant style, he pulled the cash from his hip pocket and paid for it on the spot. Subsequently he became Sir William Forbes, 1st Lord of Callendar … and that’s how you join the aristocracy. Common as muck one day and a Knight of the Realm the next! Probably wasn’t quite like that but you catch our drift.Internal view of Callendar House

A new experience

Although Callendar House is pretty much in the centre of Falkirk most towns folk had never been anywhere near it. The Forbes kept it very private. However, in 1963 the local Council took it over, opened it up to the public and established a cafe for non-aristocrats like ourselves. After our walk it was nice to get inside and settle down with some coffee. And we could either have a plain or, surprise, surprise, a milk chocolate and strawberry scone. In the interests of expanding  reader’s sconological knowledge we rather tentatively opted for the latter.

View from tearoom in Callendar House
View from the tearoom


On previous visits we have been quite critical of this tearoom. To us, it never seems to ever reach its full potential. We could still level that accusation now but at least on this occasion there were staff on hand and we were attended to promptly and quite pleasantly if not smilingly.  Still no cream but the scone itself was really nice … no crunchiness but fresh and moist. With this combination there was really no need for jam or cream, it was delicious just with a little butter. A topweird scone!

Provost lamps at Callendar House
Newly refurbished cast iron Provost lamps installed at the back of the house
Agreements

In 1565 the marriage agreement between Mary Queen of Scots and the French Dauphin, Francis was signed in Callendar House. External view of Callendar HouseIt provided that Scotland and France should eventually be united as one kingdom,  We all know how that went. Since then Scotland has been in Europe and then back out again … better to hold onto something if you are starting to feel a bit dizzy. Westminster has now reached some sort of agreement in N.Ireland to restore power-sharing at Stormont. It seems Westminster is going to try to persuade the EU that nothing has changed and that N. Ireland is still in the EU rather than the UK while simultaneously persuading everyone else of the opposite. With Westminster’s well honed skills in duplicity, they may well succeed!

FK1 1YR          tel: 01324 503775         Callendar House Tearoom

///wishes.dozen.parks

Scones

Forth & Co

12 Comments

Well here we are in 2023. We hope that all our readers had a great time over the festive season. Here’s to you all having a happy, and above all, healthy year. The first scone of 2023 comes to you courtesy of Forth & Co in our home town of Falkirk. Perhaps, at this point we should just mention that it’s quite a sinful one! 

We came into town early and decided to have breakfast out. Forth & Co has recently opened having replaced Johnstone’s Bar & Bistro which we reviewed back in 2016. We thought we should give this new place a whirl. In my teenage years this was the Temperance Cafe, a place to hang out with all the other cool cats. The coolest cats (such as myself) met upstairs on the balcony where we could look down on ordinary folk and talk about girls, politics and the price of milk. Okay, mostly girls … certainly don’t remember any in-depth discussions on scones! Six decades later there are some pretty obvious changes but in essence it’s amazingly the same.Internal view of Forth & Co

Sinful

What we are trying to explain is that we came here for breakfast and did not expect scones to be present so early in the day. But there they were and after coffee and a lovely breakfast roll we found ourselves tucking into a scone … can’t help ourselves! And it was still early morning! Not absolutely sure what the correct time for scone scoffing is but we do know it’s not this early. Hopefully, we’ve not upset any of our more delicate and genteel readers!

A scone at Forth & CoHalf expecting to be struck down by a thunderbolt we cut our scone in half and proceeded to spread the Irish butter and the French jam … argh! There was also a generous bowl of whipped cream. It was all rather nice though fairly obviously not freshly baked on the premises. Service was very efficient and friendly but there’s some work to be done if they want a topscone award.

Forth & Co is part of the Bow Hospitality chain of about ten similar restaurants around Scotland. It was quiet when we arrived but thankfully it was busy by the time we were leaving at 11am. We’re sure it will be just as successful as its predecessor.Internal view of Forth & Co

The Falkirk Televisor

No need to remind avid readers but this building was the scene for the world’s first ever TV broadcast. It was conducted by local boy John Logie Baird as he broadcast an image of a dummy named Snooky Bill (no comments please) from one room to another using his ‘televisor’ invention. It did work, though the pictures were extremely fuzzy! The equipment is now in the local museum.

Extremely fuzzy could well describe the political picture for 2023. Both here in the UK and in the US, politicians seem to be held to ransom by far right extremists. Fortunately we have Harry and Meghan to take our minds off all of that.

Harry’s book ‘Spare’ has occupied the news for the past week. Our own family seem like paragons of virtue compared to the Royals so it is perfectly understandable that Harry wants to put some distance between them. Considering what we the public subject the Royals to, it is hardly surprising that they are dysfunctional. Amidst all the people struggling with utility bills and food banks the tone deaf Charles is busy with the Queen Somesort organising his coronation. A brand new eatery like Forth & Co is definitely more worthy of celebration.Logo of Forth & Co

FK1 1DG       tel: 01324 646758       Forth & Co

///pretty.sketch.single

Ordinary, Scones

Aran

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In case you think that we are now far away on the Isle of Arran let us assure you that we hardly had to go any distance for this post. Just a short walk into Falkirk town centre, in fact. Those of you who already speak Scottish Gaelic will know that Aran is Gaelic for ‘bread’. For those who don’t know Gaelic you’ve learned something already. Here’s something else. This place used to be called Coffee on Wooer because it’s situated at the junction of Tollbooth Street and Wooer Street (derived from Weaver Street). We reviewed that back in 2016 and it did not turn out well.

Back then when we asked for a scone the chap behind the counter picked one up and tried, unsuccessfully, to penetrate it with a fork. We like them crunchy on the outside but there’s a limit. He even said “I wouldn’t if I was you“! After that it was a vegan cafe called “The Wooer” and that wasn’t much of an improvement.  This latest incarnation, Aran, has only been going a couple of months but would it be any better?Internal view of Aran

From the outside it looks much the same as it’s always done. Inside it is much improved, however, if a little on the sparse side. We were greeted with a cheery “hi” as soon as we walked through the door. Things were looking up already! We had arranged to have some lunch a little later so at this point we just wanted a scone to share. They do have a nice menu, however, that prides itself on its locally sourced produce. There were plain scones available but we opted for our usual fruit.

Fresh

A scone at AranIt wasn’t long before the lovely young lady looking after us had us all sorted with a tea, a coffee and a scone. No cream unfortunately but at least the little pots of jam and butter looked as if they could be local produce … yeah! The scones tasted deliciously fresh. And, when we asked, we were assured that they’re baked in their own kitchen each and every morning. In the past, we’ve not had good experiences here so this was all rather wonderful. Not quite topscone but about as close as you can get.  Well done Aran, a vast improvement on your predecessors, keep up the good work!

Sunny uplands?

What wasn’t so wonderful was the recent Autumn Statement delivered by our new Chancellor, Jeremy Hunt. The Tories pride themselves on being the sensible party when it comes to government and fiscal responsibility. It’s their USP … they know how to run things! Yet, after twelve years in power, we are being told to expect the biggest drop in living standards in over fifty years. Everyone is going to be considerably poorer. We are also the only member of the G7 countries to have a smaller economy now than it had before the pandemic. In other words we are going backwards at a rate of knots. Gosh, can you imagine what it would be like if we had a government that didn’t know what it was doing??

On the upside, they say that after a few years of abject misery we will return to the sunny uplands again. That’ll be the same sunny uplands we were promised after Brexit? We’re still waiting!Logo of Aran

There’s another Aran in nearby Linlithgow. It’s run by the same people so we may have to try that as well. Just to relieve the abject misery which is to be wrought upon us , if nothing else.

FK1 1NJ        tel: 01506 844477         Aran FB   

///vibrate.buck.pepper

Scones, Uncategorized

Tattie Bogle’s

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Russia and it’s people are not exactly flavour of the month these days but, of course, that’s very unfair. Russians are just like the rest of us. They are not all evil despots like Putin, just like we in the UK, are not all bumbling idiots. Anyway, in a miniscule way, this post will try and redress the problem even though we may get accused of being diverted away from the main purpose of this blog.

It’s all about a new enterprise in Falkirk called Tattie Bogle’s. It’s a healthy eating place that tries to minimise packaging and it’s owned by a husband and wife team. She is Scottish and he’s Russian … lovely folk and passionate about what they do.Internal view of Tattie Bogle's

Scary stories

Some of you who are not so familiar with Scottish terminology may be wondering about the name Tattie Bogle’s. A  tattie is a potato here in Scotland as in tattie scone, mince and tatties etc etc. Bogle refers to something scary, as in bogeyman. When you put the two together you end up with a human like form standing amongst crops to scare off unwanted visitors … a scarecrow! Loving parents all over Scotland would tell their children elaborate stories about tattie bogles to scare them half to death.

So Tattie Bogle’s is not a cafe or restaurant, it’s a kind of old-fashioned organic ethical grocers selling, amongst lots of other things, locally sourced fresh fruit and veg. You take along your own containers to cut down on packaging. We are definitely in favour of that … packaging seems to be a modern day curse. They even get their organic milk from Robert Burns’s Mossgiel Farm in Ayrshire. Having said it’s not a cafe it does have a couple of tiny tables where you can sit and have coffee. It was a fabulous sunny day so we thought we would see if they had any scones (we do try to stay on message).

Bavarian croissant, empire biscuits and snowballs
Freshly baked Bavarian croissants, empire biscuits and snowballs

No, no scones but they did have some other delicious looking baking. Bavarian chocolate croissant at Tattie Bogle'sThis is where we got diverted … no scones were harmed in this post. We ended up getting a Bavarian chocolate croissant to share. When we asked for a knife, however, we were told “no knives“. Gosh they really are serious about this no wastage thingy. No matter, Pat ripped it in half with her bare hands. It was delicious and if we were dishing out top-croissant awards this would definitely have qualified.

Brute strength

It was very pleasant sitting there in the sunshine so we decided to prolong our stay with an empire biscuit. An empire biscuit at Tattie Bogle'sNot even a plate this time, just a brown paper bag. Again, Pat just grabbed it and broke it in half. She can be absolutely ruthless when she wants. Having said that, I got the half with the cherry. don’t mistake this for altruism or generosity … she doesn’t like cherries!

Tattie Bogle’s sources its produce with consideration for people, animals and the environment We found its simple ‘back to basics ethos when it comes to health quite refreshing. Let’s have more more Scots/Russian collaborations, more power to their collective elbow!

​We would, however, like less power for Putin’s elbow You could say that he’s a bit of a tattie bogle, he has managed to successfully keep the West at bay after all. From his point of view nuclear weapons are actually a very successful deterrent. They’ve certainly paralysed the West militarily and allowed him to do pretty much as he pleases.

FK1 1JQ     tel: 01324 227718.     Tattie Bogle

///jaws.jungle.calculating

Ordinary, Scones

4 Coo Wynd

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Although 4 Coo Wynd is only a few minutes walk from our home it’s three years since we were last here. Goodness, a lot has happened since then! Back then we were bemoaning the fact that businesses in Falkirk didn’t seem to last. This place was called Cafe Trio back then and before that it was Sorocha’s and before that it was Mathiesons and before that, in 2003, it was Sleeves … a record shop – remember them? Having said all that, 4 Coo Wynd is right next door to Thomas Johnston Butchers, established in 1861, so what on earth are we going on about??

A view of the Cow Wynd, Falkirk
Cow Wynd with Santa overhead

Three years ago we were debating the important issues of the day e.g. what jam to have with a treacle scone and would Brexit have an effect on the scone supplies. The answer to the first question was ‘none’, just butter is best. Brexit hadn’t yet happened but we were looking forward to the promised sunny uplands. Still waiting! Didn’t bother discussing COVID-19 because we had never heard of it!Logo of 4 Coo Wynd

Back to the present. For the benefit of our far flung readers we should perhaps explain the name “4 Coo Wynd”. Artists impression of a highland cowIt is simply the address of the cafe which, more accurately is 4 ‘Cow’ Wynd. Coo is simply Scottish pronunciation of “cow”. In the 18th century, Falkirk Tryst was the biggest cattle market in the country. The town was a rumbustious place in those days. However, there is more to Falkirk than just cows … much more.

  • This was as far north as the Romans got. They liked it so much they decided to settle here, a sort of shangrila. Emperor Antoninus even built a wall across Scotland and through the town to protect it from less civilised influences. Traces of this period can still be found with the ice cream parlours scattered around the town?
  • Falkirk has seen two major battles. The first, in 1298, was one of the major battles in the First War of Scottish Independence … can you believe it’s still going on? The second was in 1746, the penultimate battle fought on British soil but fought for the same reason as the first.
  • In 1565 the marriage agreement between Mary Queen of Scots and the Dauphin of France was signed at Callendar House. She would become Queen of France as well as Scotland.
  • In the 18th century the town became the heart of the iron industry with 61 foundries. Starting with munitions for the Battle of Trafalgar to the famous red telephone boxes still found all around the world. The inventiveness of these foundries making baths, stoves and sanitary ware led to massive increases in public health and comfort.
  • Now the town has the Falkirk Wheel and the Kelpies and shortly, two distilleries … what’s not to like?
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A scone at 4 Coo WyndOkay, okay, the world owes a great deal to Falkirk but can we just get on with scones, we hear you cry! We decided to start with a bacon roll from their all-day-breakfast menu, followed by a fruit scone. Probably the best bacon rolls we have ever tasted … excellent! The scone was very good too but, unfortunately just not quite good enough to make the topscone grade. Shame, the service was warm and friendly, we thoroughly enjoyed our visit to 4 Coo Wynd.Internal view of 4 Coo Wynd

Predictions

Given the current fiasco that passes for UK government we, perhaps, shouldn’t be all that surprised at the predictions of a recent  poll. It says that, at the next election, ALL Scottish MPs at Westminster will be from the Scottish National Party. We did mention earlier that the first battle of Falkirk in 1298 was during the Wars of Scottish Independence. Soooo, do you think that, if this prediction actually came to pass, it would make any difference? Of course not!

Falkirk High Street
the High Street

Three years ago we also reviewed a scone from Passiontree Velvet in Toowoomba, Queensland. These were the heady days of unrestricted travel and bountiful scones all over the world … ahh, the memories! Once again it looks like our scone adventuring has been brought to a shuddering halt by COVID-19. 4 Coo Wynd will probably be our last for a while. That means we need to take this opportunity to wish all our readers a very merry Christmas and a happy, healthy and prosperous 2022 when it comes. You have put up with our rants for a very long time, best wishes to you all!

FK1 1PL       Tel: 07477 173117        4 Coo Wynd

///deep.tricky.shower

Scones, topweird

Finnegans

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The big important question is … are we happy?  At the moment there is the prospect of COVID vaccinations starting next week in Scotland. Fortunately, we are so old that we’re pretty near the front of the queue. Hurrah! There’s a flip side to the coin, however! Finnegans logoWe still cannot travel; we still can’t meet family and friends; we’re still leaving the EU at the end of the month and we still have a lunatic leading the free world. On top of all that we are being bombarded with Christmas adverts and music telling us life is perfect and that we should not only be happy but jolly happy. And it’s raining … argh! Okay, okay, in spite of all that we’ve made a decision. We are happy! And we hope that all our readers are too. A celebratory scone at Finnegans was called for.

internal view of Finnegans

Choices

This café is in the centre of Falkirk but the last time we were here was four years ago. Back then it was called Findlays. With the name change it presumably came under new management and normally, when this happens, we try and revisit to see if anything’s changed. Don’t know why it has taken us so long to revisit this one. Of course, we had to go through the, now commonplace and familiar palaver of wearing masks, giving our contact details and sanitising our hands.  But it has to be said that the staff, even with all these additional burdens,  couldn’t have been nicer or more helpful. We decided on some lunch followed by a scone to share. The choice was between plain and wheaten so, in the spirit of adventure, we went for wheaten … oooooh! 

A scone at FinnegansLunch was excellent and afterwards when our scone arrived it did look a little different. No crunchiness here, rather an overall firmness which was more bread-like than anything else. Nevertheless it was very enjoyable. And because it simply added to our already happy state we decided to award a topweird scone. Why not? 

Artwork at Finnegans
Interesting wall art at Finnegans
Surreal year

The only other Finnegan we know is the book Finnegans Wake by James Joyce. Not that we’ve read it or anything, it is devilishly difficult and far beyond our meagre intellects! Perhaps we should give it a go, however, because it supposedly attempts to recreate the experience of sleep and dreams … kind of like the somewhat surreal experience of 2020. As the year draws to a close it is tempting to reflect on all that has happened in the past twelve months. Then again, perhaps not! Just make up your mind to be happy … works for us!

FK1 1LL         tel: 01324 614050           Finnegans FB

///silks.tasty.soon

Scones, Top

Arnotdale House & Café

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If you were to hear someone talking about the “Grand Old Man Of The Pacific”, the town of Falkirk, here in Scotland, might not immediately spring to mind. However, Robert Dollar, was the said “Grand Old Man”, and he was Falkirk born and bred. A high school drop out, he starting off as an errand boy and ended up with a shipping empire that commanded trade all across the Pacific. His home in California was called “Falkirk” and his home in Falkirk was called Arnotdale. He didn’t actually live at Arnotdale, he just bought it in 1920 and bequeathed it to the people of the town. As you do if you are one of the richest men in the world. Now it’s called Arnotdale House & Café and it’s run by the Cyrenians, a charity that helps take care of homeless people.

No, we’re not homeless, that’s not why we’re here. Rather it was an invitation from friends to take afternoon tea with them.. What could be nicer? After all, the only thing nicer than afternoon tea is afternoon tea with good friends.

Secret of success

The extensive gardens now form Dollar Park, a wonderful leisure area appropriately named in memory of the town’s benefactor. Actually, I have a personal connection to Robert Dollar albeit a wee bit tenuous … okay, a big bit! In 1874, while deep in debt, Robert married a Miss Proudfoot to whom he attributed his entire success. Almost eighty years later, I was taught to play tennis in Dollar Park by none other than Miss Proudfoot … not the same one obviously though at the time, I do remember thinking she was quite old. Mind you, at that time I regarded anyone over fifteen years of age as quite old! Under Miss Proudfoot’s tutelage, I went on to became a very mediocre tennis player. So I can probably attribute my level of success to Miss Proudfoot as well. Told you it was tenuous!Internal view of Arnotdale House

Anyway enough of all that, what about the scones? We were fortunate to be seated in a large bay window with views over the beautiful gardens. Afternoon tea at Arnotdale HouseWithin minutes two three teir stands of goodies were placed on our table. There was quite a selection. Various quiches, sausage rolls and sandwiches on the bottom and cakes and chocolate dipped strawberries on the top. The scones, together with little pots of jam and cream, rightfully occupied a tier of their own in the middle. It was all rather splendid.

Readers will be aware that we don’t like large scones with our afternoon tea but, if anything, these ones might have been a tad on the small side. They were delicious though and considering everything else we had to eat the size of the scones turned out to be a blessing. We couldn’t finish everything. The lovely Cyrenian folks kindly boxed up everything we hadn’t eaten so that we could take it home. What’s not to like? Well done Arnotdale House & Café, topscone and many thanks to our friends for inviting us.

Lady leaders
The disaster that is the USofA just goes on and on. People dying left right and centre and seemingly no one in charge … unbelievable.
Statue of the Prodigal Son in Dollar Park
Statue in the park of the Prodigal Son
And the Donald sits fuming about the election with his finger on the nuclear button … scary! Mind you the UK is equally rudderless. We have a new Prime Minister but we just don’t know who it is yet. Now that Cummings and Cain have gone many think it’s Carrie Symonds, Boris’s live in lover. No bad thing perhaps. On recent performances there’s an argument to be made that all countries and political parties should have female leaders. Just not Margaret Thatcher … or Theresa May. And definitely not Priti Patel!
 
In spite of awarding coronavirus contracts worth £billions to their pals in government they are now spending another £40b in arms contracts. To developing technology to fight wars in space. This is in spite of most major security problems being pretty low tech. Mostly guys in flipflops blowing themselves up or running amok with a knife? There has to be a better way to spend that amount of money … puttin the Cyrenians out of business perhaps?
 
FK1 5SQ         tel: 01324 323331         Arnotdale House
///tribal.regret.showcases
Ordinary, Scones

Bob & Berts revisited

4 Comments

Still carless so we remain pretty much tethered to home.  Our car is currently on Harris in the Outer Hebrides where the previous post hailed from. We are being inundated with photos of our granddaughters enjoying fabulous weather and swimming on Hebridean beaches.

Luskentyre beach on Harris
our granddaughter Lola running on one of the many overcrowded beaches in the Outer Hebrides

Meanwhile, back in Falkirk, with no particular desire to use public transport just yet, we were not feeling the same degree of joyous unfettered freedom. But sensing a bit of a scone urge, we quietly made our way to our own local High Street. And when we got there Bob & Berts was the only cafe with any available outside seating. So it was to be “Bob & Berts revisited”. Last time we reviewed this place it was our very first scone of 2019.

Car doors

Back then we appraised our 2018 year of sconing. The big political news of the year had been a member of the Royal family closing her own car door. The media was full of it. Some congratulatory but others full of righteous indignation at the sheer unabashed brashness of it all. Since then, of course, the responsible person has been banished from whence she came and since then all Royal car doors have remained free of scandal. Phew!

Snagging lists

Momentarily, we also turned to religion. God, we reckoned, must have looked with dismay at the mess He had made of His snagging list over two millennia. We felt, however, that He would have taken a crumb of comfort from a whole bunch of countries banding together in a spirit of cooperation to form the EU. He would have been proud! Oh dear, what will He be thinking now?Bob&Berts sign

Last time, we gave Bob and Berts a bit of a hard time for not selling us a raspberry ripple scone and importing their jam from Oregon. That’s a massive carbon footprint for a wee pot of jam. Nashville Fruit CompanyWell, this time they only had cherry scones but the jam was still the same. We have to conclude that they are either impervious to justifiable criticism or they don’t read  allaboutthescones.com. Incredibly we suspect it’s the latter. Heyho, we wouldn’t really want anyone serving American jam in Scotland to be reading our blog anyway!

A scone at Bob&BertsWe wish our “Bob & Berts revisited” experience had been an improvement on the first visit but it wasn’t. Our shared cherry scone was almost inedible. It may have been fresh on a certain day last week but it certainly wasn’t now. We left half of it. Stale scones, scooshie cream and American jam … what’s to like? Well, the coffee was actually quite good and the place itself has a nice hipsterish vibe. Not enough to make us rush back though.

Poetic scones

We are spoiled when it comes to refreshments because our coffee correspondent keeps us supplied with delicious Cat’s Pyjamas coffee from Henry’s Coffee Company. Sometimes we even find the odd anonymous package of trout on our doorstep and suspect it might be the very same correspondent. Among his many talents, he is renowned for his recitals of the poems of Robert Burns. He couldn’t bear for our antipodean corespondents to be the only ones waxing lyrically about scones so he’s penned a response.  As expected, his ditty has an appropriate Scottish flavour.

Great tastin scone yir so elusive.
Tae find yir likes, one hikes ower Scotland’s hills and glens and islands.
Thru toons and villages, some wi’ sheds, some wi’ telephone boxes.
Some oft visited by wee ‘Willy Winkie’ and Pat and Billy.
Yir crumblin crumbs and so soft centre cause chaos on my taste buds.
Yi’ll taste much better when Scotland’s independent.

Normality?

 Don’t know if this can be taken as a sign of things returning to normal after COVID? Remember the £5.36 I had in my pocket since March. Remember it mysteriously went up to £6.36. Well, now it’s gone. It’s now just 56p. No idea what’s happened but it’s definitely suffered a severe shock. It’s certainly not due to me being unduly profligate but I’ve obviously had to stick my hand in my pocket for some reason. I would, however, caution the world against taking this as conclusive proof a resumption of normality.

Ordinary, Scones

Bossard’s Patisserie

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This visit to Bossard’s Patisserie signifies the continuation of our tour of Oban and Mull. Okay, it’s a kind of virtual tour now but it did actually happen albeit over a week ago. They say a week is a long time in politics but, nowadays, it actually seems even longer in real life! Looking at the world media it appears that they have Boris sussed. Many of them seem to think that the only thing more dangerous than coronavirus is Boris Johnson himself. Okay we know it’s really Dominic Cummings but Boris is the face of Dominic.

Nicola Sturgeon and Boris Johnson
This neatly sums up the stark contrast between Nicola and Boris on coronavirus advice

And, in these dark times, what would we do without Donald Trump. He reckons it will all be over by Easter. Presumably, he thinks Easter is in September. How did these numpties end up in charge?

Anyway, on to important matters. As we said in our last post from Café Shore we are trying to space out our scones to cover this period of self-isolation. We hope you are all well and sitting waiting with bated breath for this post. Bossard’s Patisserie is actually only a hundred yards from Café Shore. It stands next to the river that flows down to the harbour area. We were puzzled by the name, Bossard’s. Turns out that the couple who own it, she is local but he is from Switzerland. Puzzlement over!

Internal view of Bossard's Patisserie, Oban

Elephant’s sufficiency

Bearing in mind that this place had to close its doors a day after our visit (nothing to do with our visit), it was quiet. Only one or two folks popping in for takeaway stuff. We were made to feel very welcome, however. It was mid-morning and we hadn’t had any breakfast. They had some unusual offerings. A scone at Bossard's Patisserie, ObanPat got coffee and a bacon and egg roll but I got ” three rolls and a scone” with coffee.  Just wanted to find out what it was. Suffice to say it consisted of three different types of bread, a scone and lots of jam and butter. We had witnessed the scones emerging from the kitchen so it wasn’t that hard a decision. There was no cream and probably just as well. There was an elephant’s sufficiency without cream. Some of the breads ended up going in a bag for us to take home.

The scone itself was about as fresh as you could get. It was delicious. Nice and warm with loads of fruit. If it hadn’t been for the prepackaged butter jam and the lack of cream this could have been a topscone. Unfortunate but this is a really nice place with loads of wonderful stuff all made on the premises. Hopefully, they will emerge from this coronavirus thing and keep doing what they were doing before. Good luck!External view of Bossard's Patisserie, Oban

Emotional times

In Falkirk, we live in a nice street. It could never be described as ‘happy go lucky’ or even having any real sense of ‘community’. Everyone is friendly enough but tend to keep themselves to themselves. Last night, however, we went to our front door at 8 o’clock to “clap in appreciation of the folks in NHS” expecting to be on our own. We were astonished to find everyone doing the same as us. The growing crescendo of clapping was very emotional. Things may never be quite the same again … some things might be for the better.

Lastly, don’t open any emails with “knock-knock” in the subject. It’s Jehovah’s Witnesses working from home!

PA34 4AY      tel: 01631 564641         Bossard’s FB

///puzzled.waiters.burglars

ps: we’ve just heard that our favourite bête noire, Boris, has tested positive. Oh dear, in spite of him and his like having stripped the NHS of hundreds of nurses and doctors, on a personal level we do wish him well.

pps: Sunnie's cheese sconesOur Perthshire correspondent, Lady12bore, has sent pics of her second ever attempt at scones. In this case, cheese scones. They look fab. Anyone else taken to baking to relieve the self-isolation monotony?