Some folk say nothing ever changes while others famously say that change is the only constant. When it comes to Falkirk’s café scene we would tend to think the former is true but then we realise there has been a change. Today’s scone comes from Callendar Coffee House, which was called the Riggs Coffee House the last time we looked. Mind you that was about eight years ago. It raises some questions: is it just a change of name or a complete change of management? Would the scones have changed as well?
Well, yes they had because we had a cheese and bacon scone. That’s a first! It does, however, follow a kind of pattern of late. On our recent travels on the Isle of Arran, we had a “very cheesy cheese scone at the Old Pier Tearoom in Lamlash. That was followed by a cheese scone with extra cheese on the side at Janie’s café in Brodick. Now it’s cheese and bacon … what is happening with cheese scones? It has to be said that although a wee bit on the weird side it was delightful. Nice and cheesy with the bacon giving extra texture and a hint of saltiness. The combination worked very well.
Television first
Callendar Coffee House is located directly on the corner of High Street and Lint Riggs. This rather grand building used to be the Temperance Hotel and on the High Street side, you can find this very modest plaque. It is high up on the wall and seemingly placed so that no one will ever notice it. It does, however, commemorate what was probably the first public demonstration of television. Okay, the broadcast was only from one room to another but still. Why does Falkirk not make more of this momentous moment in history? After all, television went on the become quite popular,
Wimps
Popular is not a word we could associate with Elon Musk these days. But we’re fed up moaning about him so let’s celebrate the return of the astronauts stranded in space for nine months. Being stranded on Arran for one extra night was a bit testing for us so hats off to them. Maybe when they take a look around they might want to get on the next rocket back up to the space station. And now the whole of Heathrow Airport has been knocked out by a power outage. We were upset by a single cancelled ferry … okay, we are wimps!
Back in the good old days, as aspiring young rock climbers we regarded this end of Glencoe and the Kingshouse Hotel as “a bit posh”. People up at this end had cars and things. We, as impoverished hitchhikers, hung out at the lower end near the Clachaig Inn where you could camp anywhere for free and the beer was a bit cheaper. From time to time, however, we would come up here to climb on the only hill with a guidebook all to itself, Buachaille Etive Mòr.
Buachaille Etive Mòr (the big shepherd of Etive) from the Kingshouse Hotel.
Remote
The hotel was built in the 18th century and was used as barracks by the Westminster government to keep the unruly locals in check after the 1745 Jacobite Rebellion. However, back when we used it the hotel was much smaller. It consisted mainly of the white building in the title photograph. Nowadays that’s simply the bar and the accommodation is in a large new extension. High up on the edge of Rannoch Moor, it’s very remote.
On a day like today all the outside seats were taken so we had to go indoors.
Although it remains a climber’s hotel the expansion has been caused by a couple of developments. Namely the advent of the Glencoe Ski Centre just a few hundred yards away and the introduction of the West Highland Way walking route that passes by the door.
Scones and coffee were the order. We were with family from Canada so it was great to sit at a table where we could look out onto the picture postcard views outside. It was busy inside as well but it didn’t take long for our scones to arrive. They were square! We couldn’t remember if we had ever had square scones before. Was it something to go with that other great Scottish delicacy – square sausage? Apologies, this next bit might be a tad technical. When the already slim scone was sliced in half, each half became quite delicate. This, of course, led to spreading difficulties. Scone breakup was a constant danger. Suffice to say, none of these problems were insurmountable. We could rant about all the non-Scottish produce in such a Scottish place but why spoil an otherwise enjoyable experience?
Rough and ready
After the Kingshouse we drove down to the lower end of the glen to the Clachaig Inn. This was our place! A corrugated iron shed around the back functioned as a bar back then. Rough and ready it was but ideal for clientele like us. Meeting other hitchhiking friends and exchanging tales of new routes conquered. All over a few beers, of course. Afterwards, there was dancing in the local village hall. It felt like complete freedom. Returning to work meant five days of dreaming about returning the following weekend.
View from the Clachaig Inn towards Aonach Dubh
Transactional
The world seems idyllic when viewing it from places like this on a beautifully warm Spring day. Everything is in the process of being renewed. So why is the rest of the world in such a mess? The current US administration is often reverentially referred to as ‘transactional’ Gods, by its supporters. Able to conjure up the best deals out of thin air. The world, or at least America, should be sitting pretty! But it isn’t!
We don’t want to disparage good honest idiots by attaching that sobriquet to Trump and Musk but it’s almost impossible not to. There’s the idiocy of what they are doing but then on top of that, you realise what’s missing from their supposedly super-negotiations. It’s morality! In the US’s unequivocal backing for Israel and Russia, it’s morality that’s missing.
Notice at the reception in the Clachaig Inn
Hospitality?
Of course, here we are in a place that epitomises what happens when morality goes out the window. In the Massacre of Glencoe in 1692 a party of 120 soldiers under the command of Robert Campbell were billeted with the McDonalds of Glencoe for several weeks, eating their food and using their shelter. One night, however, a signal from Campbell saw the soldiers rise and murder their hosts in their beds. To this day Campbells aren’t welcome at the Clachaig. Perhaps today’s US administration should bear in mind that sometimes folks have looong memories!
Today we are at River House on the outskirts of Stirling. A lot has happened in the few days since our previous post from the Seagull Trust.
America’s reputation as the leader of the free world lies in tatters on the Oval Office floor. Oh dear, oh dear, the spectacle of Trump and his rottweiler pals trying to humiliate the defender of the Western world, was shocking and profoundly embarrassing for everyone unfortunate enough to have witnessed it. And then after a passage of Trump waxing lyrically about his many highly dubious attributes, came “Why do you not wear a suit?” Surely destined to go down in history as the most cretinous thing ever said to a world leader. It was, however, indicative of the hillbilly level of understanding in the room. It was left up to the good people of Vermont to restore some faith by letting JD Vance know he wasn’t welcome in their part of the world.
Now they want Zalensky to make a groveling apology for not sufficiently appreciating the US and the American people. Have they forgotten that unlike them, Zalensky has some semblance of intelligence and will doubtless grovel like a superhero?
At last, we made it
We feel confident the American people will eventually come to their senses and sort out this Muskesque Presidency. In the meantime, let’s get back to the serious business of scones. River House is a place we have been meaning to visit for years. We keep seeing the signs but never actually follow them. It is beautifully situated on the shores of a tiny loch with views of Stirling Castle.
It’s spacious and beautifully themed in the same style as other Cawley Group restaurants. It has a nice relaxed ambience. After a delicious light lunch, our nicely warmed scones were duly presented with a jar of jam and whipped cream in a little ladle thingy. Although not quite the consistency we normally go for they were very enjoyable nevertheless. Salutary to be able to sit in such comfortable surroundings several thousand miles away from the diabolical situation in Ukraine.
DANGER!
Guarantees?
Ukraine used to have the third biggest nuclear arsenal in the world until, in the 1994 Budapest Memorandum, it was persuaded to give it up completely in exchange for international guarantees that its borders would be respected. We don’t think they would have signed had they known that a bunch of muppets would be their guarantors in 2025.
We are a little late with this post. You should have got it on Wednesday because that’s when we were last at the Lion and Unicorn Inn in the village of Thornhill near Stirling. But thereby hangs a tale … a sconological tale.
The lion is the national animal of England, and the unicorn is Scotland’s. It is a well known fact that a unicorn is a symbol of innocence and the only creature that can defeat a lion.
We had been here several weeks before and were delighted to note “scones” on the menu. When we asked for them, however, we were told they didn’t have any. Apparently, they were that rare breed, only available on Wednesdays and Thursdays. The next time we were here was when we posted from The Winnock when trying to find the MacGregor Monument. It was a Thursday, so thought we would try our luck. Still no scones but we did glean a little more information. They did a coffee morning “for the village” on Wednesday mornings. This was becoming a challenge!
So it was that on this Wednesday morning we thought we should phone ahead to check if the scones were only for “the village” or whether outsider riff riff such as ourselves could also partake. “Of course, no problem“, we were told.
Once there were eight pubs in the village but this is the only one left … a sign of the times. The Lion and Unicorn has been serving fine food, ales and presumably scones since 1635 … all we had to do was engage with one! We set off on the thirty minute drive to Thornhill with steely determination and a keen sense of anticipation. Would it be third time lucky?
Things I don’t know
A grandson of John Napier, inventor of logarithms, owned land here at one time. I mention this simply because I must have been off school the day they explained their importance. I never “got it”! In spite of years spent carrying a little book of sines, cosines and tangents around in my school bag, my entire career passed without the need for any of them. I’ve also discovered something else to further demonstrate the depth of my ignorance … Shetland cows. A farm at Thornhill breeds Shetland cows. Shetland ponies are famous but Shetland cows? Apparently, they are small, hardy and ideally suited to living in the special environment of Flanders Moss on the edge of the village. Anyway I could write a very hefty tome on things I don’t know so let’s return to more familiar territory … scones!
When we arrived we were shown to a table for two. We could easily see what they meant by a “coffee morning for the village“. From the babble of excited chatter emanating from a long table across from us it was pretty obvious what was going on. The large plate of scones was also a give away.Our host, the wonderful Fiona, remembered us. Presumably as the weird folk who were always asking about scones. We obviously made and impression! She asked if we would like to join the others at the long table. Initially we felt we would be intruding but suffice to say another couple of chairs were found and we were warmly welcomed. It was almost as if we were “villagers”! What a super friendly and interesting bunch of sconeys.
Coincidence
Unbelievably, one of the group, Janet, used to work alongside my late uncle in nearby Aberfoyle many years ago. She knew my cousins very well. Apart from ourselves, Janet was the only “outsider” there. To say that we thoroughly enjoyed meeting these people and joining their coffee morning would be a mighty understatement. They made our day! A hundred years ago a local newspaper wrote that Thornhill was “the pleasantest of pleasant villages“. We can vouch for that still being the case. The self-effacing Fiona had made the scones earlier that morning. When she discovered that her scones were to be “judged” she explained that the batteries on her scales had given up. She had had to guess at the quantities for the recipe.
She needn’t have worried, they were beautifully presented and easy topscones. Later, we discovered from our new found friends that her batteries had packed up months ago. Well done Fiona for making these delicious scones by pure force of habit and for being so welcoming. For us it was third time very lucky
Victorian photo of the Lion and Unicorn. Folks arriving for a village coffee morning?
As complete strangers it was heartwarming to be welcomed into what seems like a village tradition. When we returned home and saw Musk prancing around the Oval Office with his son Lil X on his shoulders it truly looked like the inmates had taken over the asylum. Take us back to the sanity of the Lion and Unicorn where the cares of the world were being discussed in a much more civilised fashion.
Happy New Year everyone! We hope that you enjoy a happy, healthy and prosperous 2022. May all your scones be topscones filled with lots of lovely jam and cream! Normally we spend Hogmanay at our local pub but this year, due to COVID restrictions, we decided to give it a miss and just spent it at home.
So far, the year has been scone free but needless to say we hadn’t reckoned on our correspondents. The last place we expected to hear about a scone, however, was Fredericton, the capital of New Brunswick in Canada.
Heroic adventure
Two of our correspondents got in touch to try and claim the highest scone ever featured on this blog. Wait until Richard Branson hears about this! Will he take up the challenge? Our correspondents had gone to extraordinary lengths! Refreshing to realise that folk still have that heroic spirit of adventure; 1st to the South Pole; 1st to climb Everest etc etc. You can probably tell from the title photo, however, that they did not transport a scone to the summit of Everest, a mere 29,000 ft … no, no, no, they had higher aspirations. 40,000 ft to be precise. And even though Everest grows at 1.5 inches a year, that was going to take a long time. They eventually managed to do it albeit with a little assistance from British Airways.
Unaware
Fredericton used to be called Pointe Ste-Anne until the British drove out the French settlers in 1758 and renamed it after one of King George III’s fifteen children. What are we Brits like? The French were foreigners in Canada after all?? Whatever, we are pretty sure that the 60,000 good people of Fredricton would have had no inkling of the momentous sconological event happening directly overhead.
Scone with height confirmation from flight information
By all accounts the scone was rather good but of course our correspondents were not qualified to give any sort of award, It does look a little odd in appearance and it is amazing that Rodda’s Cornish Cream can get to these dizzying heights as well as just about everywhere else on the planet. They thoroughly enjoyed them, however, and that’s all that really matters, isn’t it! As for the highest scone award, yes this is indeed it. Our previous high flying scone was a measly 33,000 feet but we cannot remember who reported it. We have introduced a new ‘highest’ category however, so if any of you want to challenge perhaps you should contact Branson, Bezos or Musk.
Travelling in COVID times
Needless to say, our correspondents did not do this specifically to gain the highest scone award, fantastic though it may be. No, they were going to visit family in Conneticut and in these COVID times that is no mean feat. To quote “not difficult taking the tests but filling in the required half baked and inaccurate websites is mind numbing. “Help line” has now become the world’s greatest oxymoron”. They made it, however, so congratulations on that as well as their scone achievement.
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PS: when we reported from Cafe Circa we said that we would let you know what the book we bought, ‘A Tillyloss Scandal’ was about. The author was none other than J.M. Barrie who created Peter Pan. He was from Kirriemuir which he called Thrums in the many stories he wrote about the town. Most of the dialogue is in the local dialect … so not a particularly easy read! It is set in the early 1800s: “Tillyloss is three broken rows of houses in the east end of Thrums, with gardens between them, nearly every one of which used to contain a pig-sty“.
Attending your own funeral
The main character is one Tammas Haggart. When he discovered that his wife, Christy, pretended to her friends that she was married to another man he was not best pleased that she should think so little of him. He left, not knowing where he would end up. After walking some distance he eventually fell asleep sitting against a tree. He awoke to find that he had been robbed of his hat and his great coat that had been lying beside him. Unbeknown to him the thief fell into a nearby quarry and died with a badly damaged face. The local folk, however, identified him as Tammas simply by the clothes he was wearing. Later when Tammas returned to the town he overheard folk talking of his demise and of the funeral arrangements. Thus, a few days later, from a distance, he was able to observe his own funeral.
Tammas went off and had many adventures as far as Edinburgh and some even say London. Eventually some years later he returned to Thrums and, of course, caused quite a stir. Consternation caused by the fact that not only was he alive but who on earth had they buried? Tammas went home to see Christy but rather than a big welcome he found her sitting quietly by the fire smoking his pipe.
As scandals go?
So now you know. Not perhaps a scandal on the scale we have nowadays with Andrew, Duke of York and Ghislaine Maxwell. However, it turns out that Prince Andrew is simply maintaining a long standing tradition. In 1809 the then Duke of York was disgraced in similar circumstances. Have no fear, however, we are sure, that Humpty Dumpty’s Duke of York was an honourable exception … phew!
by Bill and Pat Paterson and is about finding good scones throughout the world, with a little bit of politics
That was followed by a cheese scone with extra cheese on the side at Janie’s café in Brodick. Now it’s cheese and bacon … what is happening with cheese scones? It has to be said that although a wee bit on the weird side it was delightful. Nice and cheesy with the bacon giving extra texture and a hint of saltiness. The combination worked very well.
It is high up on the wall and seemingly placed so that no one will ever notice it. It does, however, commemorate what was probably the first public demonstration of television. Okay, the broadcast was only from one room to another but still. Why does Falkirk not make more of this momentous moment in history? After all, television went on the become quite popular,
