Tag Archives: Cornwall

Scones, Uncategorized

Cornish Cream Tea

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We’ve been getting around a bit recently. In the past few months our posts have come from such diverse places as Pleased To Meet You  in Northumberland to the Final Checkout in Shetland. It seems fitting, therefore, that we should now be having a Cornish Cream Tea in Cornwall. Except that we’re not! We are enjoying a Cornish Cream Tea but we’re not at the most southerly tip of England, we’re at home. This cream tea was a gift from friends and it came in a box.

How nice is that? A genuine Cornish Cream Tea from the Cornish Company without the twelve hour drive to get there. What’s more it came with everything required of a cream tea including two wee bottles of prosecco … fab! There was Cornish scones, Cornish jam, Cornish Smugglers Brew tea and a tub of Rodda’s Cornish clotted cream. We normally object to Rodda’s when more locally sourced cream is readily available but in this instance, of course, it was totally appropriate. What more could you ask for?

They are particular about their cream teas in Cornwall so it came with full instructions. Instructions for a Cornish Cream Tea

Step 3 is marked “very important” and refers to the ‘jam first’ rule. A few years back when the National Trust advertised a cream tea at one of its properties in Cornwall it used a photograph of a ‘cream first’ scone. The ensuing outrage resulted in mass resignations from the National Trust. ‘Cream first’ is, of course, the Devon way and totally abhorrent to Cornish folks. A grovelling apology was issued.

No such ridiculous faux pas here however, we already knew how to prepare a scone properly … the “jam first” way, the civilised way, the Cornish way!Our Cornish Cream Tea at home

It was a fine day so we sat in the garden with the only sounds coming from blackbirds nesting in a nearby hydrangea. Our scones were fab, as was everything else. As we have often done recently, we thought how lucky we were to be able to do this and to have such wonderful friends.

What do we know?

We can all breathe a sigh of relief, the Eurovision Song Contest is over for another year. Sweden’s Loreen  won with her song Tattoo. We don’t understand why it won except that people must have voted for it. But then, we have a Westminster government intent on ruining the UK and people must have voted for that as well?

TR9 6TL       The Cornish Company 

Ordinary, Scones

Smugglers Cafe

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Today we are in a Cornwall cafe, the Smugglers. It’s inspired by life on the beach, surfing waves and getting your hair bleached by the sun. Only problem is that the nearest beaches, discounting the nearby mud banks of the River Thames, are many many miles away. Life is better at the beachWe are actually in Putney in central London. Nevertheless, Chrissie, who owns this place, has a soft spot for Cornwall and is determined that the Smugglers Cafe should make people feel a little bit of that Cornwall vibe.

“Cornish Smugglers” conjures up a somewhat romantic notion of hardy folk trying to get the better of overzealous excise men. In London, however, we suspect it might have somewhat darker overtones. Fortunately, the decor of surfboards and photos of bronzed beach-ready bodies went some way towards lifting our mood as the rain did its best to come through the plate glass of the Smugglers Cafe window.

Internal view of the Smugglers cafe in PutneyThe cafe itself is tiny but the staff are welcoming and soon had us fixed up with a delicious lunch. After that, we could not risk a scone each so we shared a cream tea. Our tea came from Cornwall, grown on the Tregothnan estate (the only tea grown in England) and the Origin coffee is roasted there as well, in Helston. Never been to Cornwall so our knowledge is limited.

Need to go

We know though that it’s the home of the ubiquitous Rodda’s Cornish Cream, the bane of our lives. We also know that it is the home of a kind and civilised people who stoically tolerate their brutish neighbours in Devon spreading cream first on their scones. A scone at the Smugglers cafe in PutneyThere was plenty of both jam and cream with our scone and we were in no doubt which was to go on first. The fresh raspberries and blueberries were a nice touch. The scone itself, however, was a bit of a disappointment. Just a bit stodgy and certainly not what we expected from a good Cornish scone. Perhaps we need to actually go to Cornwall?

99 to go

T100 Extreme things to dohere were lots of nice homely touches in the Smugglers Cafe. On our table there was a tiny green bucket with little discs inside. It was 100 Extreme Things to Do Before You Kick The Bucket … great! Almost the first one we pulled out was Go On A Blind Date, eh? We did that nearly 50 years ago … and we’re still on it! How on earth are we supposed to get round to the other 99?

Recycling?

This week has been bittersweet … we finished the Christmas cake on the train coming down to London. Pat baked it and I iced and marzipan it with the indispensable assistance of a couple of granddaughters. Pat is not that keen but I am very keen on Christmas cake so when I say ‘we’ finished it I really mean ‘I’ finished it. That’s it gone for another year … boo! Christmas, of course, has other after-effects. Today there is much talk of the need to recycle. Indeed it has taken over our lives. Knowing what goes in which bin and when it goes out has become a sort of art form. People who actually know these things are regarded as truly wise oracles, surreptitiously consulted by their bewildered neighbours.

We buy masses of plastic castles, farmyards and other lumps of plastic just to keep our little angels momentarily happy. It is all then stuffed in a cupboard to be thrown out the following year to make way for even more stuff. Never mind the energy it takes to produce all this rubbish, when we try to recycle plastic it takes lots more energy. Either that or it goes to landfill. It’s ironic that in attempting to get some short term gratification from our children we actually end up helping destroy their future. The smart thing to do, of course, is not to recycle but not to buy in the first place! The children won’t mind. Especially if you explain that having a non-plastic Christmas might make it worthwhile going to the effort of growing up.

picture at the Smugglers Cafe
On the Smugglers wall .. it should be Cornwall but looks suspiciously like Scotland

They may even get to Cornwall and enjoy that vibe!

SW151JT.        Tel:                           Smugglers

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Ordinary, Scones

Brian’s Café

Yesterday morning we were back at the Hippodrome in Bo’ness to see The Shape Of Water. An unexpectedly enjoyable film. It’s really a love fantasy but it also turns out to be surprisingly topical. The Americans had captured a unique South American water monster with peculiarly human characteristics. Honestly, it’s better than it sounds! Rather than let the US acquire any  advantage by studying the beast and unearthing its secrets the Russians, in the form of KGB agents, plotted to kill it with a lethal injection. Have you heard of any similar stories recently?

It is amusing to see the media in a frenzy wondering where the nerve agents directed against Sergei Skripal and his daughter could have come from. Without ever mentioning the world’s biggest stockpile of such chemical weapons at Porton Down. Only eight miles from Salisbury where Skripal was found. Interior view of Brian's Café in BonessAll fingers seem to be pointing at Vladimir Putin however and probably with good reason.

Have you noticed a rather worrying trend among world leaders recently? Putin, who unexpectedly came to power because Boris Yeltsin hadn’t enough blood in his vodka system, now finds himself drunk on power itself. He has manufactured a situation where he can remain in power indefinitely. Likewise with President Xi of China. Power is a great corrupter and both men now seem to think that they are omnipotent. Meanwhile, back in the USA, President Trump  knows he is omnipotent but, unlike Putin and Xi, hasn’t yet worked out a scam to keep the job for a life. Watch this space. Theresa May on the other hand will be forced to keep her job for life whether she likes it or not simply because it’s such a mess no one else wants it. Interior view of Brian's Café in Boness

Serafini family

Enough of all that. Just across the road from the Hippodrome is the imaginatively named Brian’s Cafe which, would you believe it, is owned by a chap called Brian, surname Curry. Its outward appearance is somewhat uninspiring and we did not have high hopes as we entered. A scone at Brian's Café in BonessThe interior is pleasant enough though and the staff were very friendly and helpful.

We were soon settled down with some tea and sharing a fruit scone. Okay, we sometimes indulge in reckless extravagance! There was no cream and the butter and jam were prepackaged but the scone itself was very good, not quite a topscone but pretty close.  The café has lots of what appeared to be family photographs hanging on the walls. When we asked about them we ended up being introduced to Brian himself. He had been sitting at another table with some friends. He’s a lovely guy who proceeded to take us round and explain his family history. Turns out that he is part of the Serafini family who not only had a cafe in Bo’ness but operated the York Café in Falkirk, a place we know very well.

Serafini family group from Brian's Café in Bo'ness
Serafini family from Barga. Brian’s aunt, Annie Curry, married Nathaniel (2nd from left, back row)

 

 

 

 

Scots locked up

What amazed us was that Brian’s aunt, a Bo’nessian born and bred, had married a Serafini and as a result was interned during WWII. It had never before occurred to us that Scots were also interned simply because of their association with Italians … unbelievable!

The Serafini's original café and their fish and chip van
The Serafini’s original café in Bo’ness  … and their fish and chip van c1950s

It was great listening to the many delightful childhood stories Brian had to tell. A far cry from today’s world of all-powerful autocrats and dastardly subterfuge.

EH51 0AA       tel: 01506 823815       Brian’s Café TA

p.s. News of an even bigger controversy came to us the other day courtesy of our correspondent, the Stenibrainfart. He reported that the National Trust in England had organised a cream tea at one of their venues in Cornwall and to publicise it they used a picture of a scone with a dollop of jam on top of the cream … arrgghh! National Trust picture of a cream tea scone

Now all self respecting sconeys worth their salt know that that is how they do it in Devon … and it’s just plain wrong! It is definitely not how they do it in Cornwall. Cornish folks have reportedly been resigning their NT membership in droves. A #JamFirst badgeThey felt so strongly they even produced #JamFirst badges to support the cause. Well done Cornwall, you tell ’em!