Tag Archives: Caribbean

Loch Melfort Hotel

19 March 2019 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

Politically, things have been so dire recently that we have been reluctant to venture out for a scone. Not because we had gone off scones, you understand, but because it would then require us to say something cogent about the current situation at Westmonster. A veritable impossibility. How is it possible to end up in a situation where the government is the most diabolically pathetic ever in the history of governments and the opposition, which is supposed to save us from such things, is even worse? Unbelievable!

We have had to break our silence, however, because believe it or not, this is our 300th scone. And still, if we turn sideways, you can barely see us. It’s truly amazing. In 2015 when we wrote our first scone post in Dunkeld, we certainly did not expect that exactly four years later we would still be at it.

View from Loch Melfort Hotel — View from our window

Stats

A lot has happened in those four years on allaboutthescones. We have mentioned Brexit 78 times. Not surprising you might think but remember, back then, the word Brexit hadn’t even been thought of. Trump hadn’t been thought of either, at least not seriously, but he managed to get himself mentioned 53 times. Theresa May only managed 43! In terms of scones we have had 76 topscones and 2 apple pies. Fonab Castle has maintained its position on top of the scone pile throughout. An extraordinary achievement by any standards.

Would our 300th provide a fitting crescendo? Where would it be?Serendipity dictated that it would be here at Loch Melfort Hotel. A lovely spot if ever there was one. It’s situated in Arduaine Gardens which in themselves are reminiscent of a tropical rain forest. The North Atlantic Drift, sweeping up from the Caribbean, has a profound affect in this part of the world. Palm trees and bamboo abound. Lichen grows in huge tresses from all the trees indicating the purity of the air. The hotel used to be the ‘big house’ of the estate but when the gardens were taken over by the National Trust for Scotland it was converted to its current use. Anyway, so what about this 300th scone?

The wrong reasons

We were fortunate to be able to sit in glorious sunshine in one of the hotal lounges looking out towards Croabh Haven and the Isle of Luing. As far as settings went this was absolutely perfect. The scone itself came nicely presented with plenty of jam and whipped cream. Unfortunately, that was the good bit. The scone had a sort of leathery skin the like of which we have never come across before. Once it had been penetrated with a knife the innards were nothing to get excited about either. This 300th scone was notable for all the wrong reasons. The jam and cream made it sort of edible however. Quelle dommage! Everything else was fantastic so it was really unfortunate that the scone let the place down so badly. Heyho, life goes on!

Democracy

Life may not be going on much longer for Theresa May. The Speaker of the House of Commons, dastardly chap that he is, has gone and foiled her wicked plan to run down the clock on Brexit. Isn’t it odd that the folk who scream about democracy having to be respected are so dead set against democracy taking its course in another referendum? Anyway we still have a few days left before the cliff edge. It has been nice knowing you all!

PA34 4XG tel: 01852 200 233 Melfort Hotel

ps: In the nearby village of Melfort we came across this K6 telephone box. It was manufactured by the Saracen Foundry in Glasgow and was the first box we have come across functioning as a prison. A padlock on the door was ensuring that the large gnome inside was prevented from escaping. We have no idea what misdemeanour the gnome had committed to deserve such a fate. Explanations on a postcard please.

Scones, Top

Inchture Hotel

29 June 2017 billpaterson1@me.com

If you ever find yourself running the mile or so from the Inchture Hotel to the train station, don’t bother! The railway is still there but the station closed in 1956.

The railway bus, Inchture — The Inchture Railway Bus – from a picture in the hotel

In a bygone age however you would not have had to run at all. You could have been transported in some style on the Inchture Railway Bus. A horse drawn tramway which ran for over 60 years up to 1917 between the village and the station. Inchture is on the north side of the Firth of Tay. It is now bypassed by the A90 which means it is relatively quiet and peaceful. We are normally in this area looking for marsh harriers and bearded tits in the reed beds on the Tay estuary. In spite of relative success, however, with the harriers, to date, we have never seen a bearded tit. They are there though … annoying!

This is our first visit to the family run Inchture Hotel … it’s nice, in a calm unpretentious kind of way! Weddings seem to be a speciality. Since we have done all that, however, scones were the only things in our thoughts. Presentation was good and service was very attentive. Profuse apologies were offered for the late arrival of our coffee even though it wasn’t that late. The scones themselves were delicious, not crunchy at all but the fruit turned out to be a lovely mix of currants, raisins, cherries and peel … different! It was kind of borderline but eventually we decided they were worthy of a topscone award … well done Inchture Hotel.

Magic money trees

No awards for Theresa May however. She condescendingly explained to a nurse that she could not get a pay rise because there was “no magic money tree”. She then suddenly found one so that she could give a bribe of one billion pounds to N. Ireland’s DUP for their support. That’s £100m per MP. The “magic money tree” of course grows in Scotland. However, Scotland, as usual, is to get zilch! If this is indicative of her negotiating tactics for Brexit, the UK had better have deep pockets. Or rather Scotland had better be prepared to fund even more of her ludicrous decisions.

PH14 9RN Tel: 01828 686298 Inchture Hotel

ps: As we mentioned in our last post, our Trossachs correspondents have been conducting a scone search on St Kitts & Nevis! Unfortunately, is spite of their considerable efforts, we have to report that the Caribbean, to all intents and purposes is a scone free zone. Bermuda triangle and all that! Unless someone knows differently, of course!

Fountains in the Gorbals

Happily though they had their handy allaboutthescones telephone box identification guide with them when they visited the Ballahoo restaurant in Basseterre, the capital of St Kitts. With it they managed to identify a K6 … they even sent a photograph of the manufacturers badge … well done them! Interestingly the large green clock/drinking fountain in the foreground was also made in Scotland – in the Sun Foundry in Glasgow to be precise. It commemorates one Thomas Berkeley Hardtman-Berkley a local estate owner who died in 1881. Even more interestingly it is an exact copy of an identical fountain which stood in the Gorbals area of Glasgow until it was dismantled in 1932.

Today the plan is to reinstate the fountain and a team from Glasgow Caledonian University has been sent to Basseterre charged with producing an exact 3D image of the fountain using lasers and digital photography. The new fountain will then be produced using their imagery … you see how mind expanding scones can be! Once again, many thanks to our correspondents for their unstinting dedication.

Ordinary, Scones

Bridge 49 Cafe Bar

19 June 2017 billpaterson1@me.com

You will never guess how this place got its name – Bridge 49 Cafe Bar? Okay we will tell you. It’s right beside bridge 49 on the Union Canal … imaginative, or what?

External view of Bridge 49 Café beside the Union Canal — Bridge 49 Café from Bridge 49

What’s in a name?

The instantly forgettable bridge is only a stone’s throw from the extremely impressive 26m high Avon Aqueduct. Built in 1821 to a Thomas Telford design. It could have been called Ristorante Aqueducti. Or something a bit less prosaic than Bridge 49 Cafe Bar! Not to worry, we take our hats off to the folks who have built this enterprise in the middle of nowhere and obviously taking a sizeable gamble with a big investment. So they can call it whatever they like, we just eat scones after all. It has a large inside restaurant but, with today being absolutely beautiful, we opted for an ‘al fresco’ fruit scone overlooking the canal while watching the boats drift by. Life can be tough, but not today. In fact, it has seldom been so toughless!

Service could best be described as ‘adequate’ and our coffee was good but the same, unfortunately, could not be said for the scones. We like them a little bit crunchy on the outside but these were just hard and dry. They were either over-baked, or, they were yesterday’s. One of the worst scones we have had in a while. Shame really because, with its outside play area for children, this is a good place for families to come and enjoy a relaxed meal without worrying too much about the kids. So don’t let us put you off. Based on our experience however the scones need a bit of a rethink.

Trump says

A rethink is exactly what’s needed after the Grenfell Tower disaster. Theresa May’s lack of empathy during her unfortunate visit to the site only served to make people angry. It reminded Conservatives that she should not be allowed out in public. Though, to give her her due, in recent times, she herself has done everything possible to avoid meeting the public. This is the third scone since the General Election and she is still desperately hanging on. It is also eleven days since the election and she is still trying to reach agreement with the ten MPs of the DUP. What chance the Brexit negotiations starting today? Perhaps she should simply restrict herself to that most wicked of pastimes – running through fields of wheat when no one is around. As Trump would say, “bad”. Or maybe his other word “sad”. The latter is probably more appropriate?

EH49 6LW teL: 01506 846536 Bridge 49

ps Readers will distinctly remember the excruciating excitement as we reported on the highest scone in the land (1531 feet) at Wanlockhead in the Leadhills. Little did we know that we were throwing down a gauntlet. Recently we received a report from happy wanderers, our intrepid Trossachs correspondents, on a 38,000 feet high scone …eh? That’s not just a mile high scone, that’s over seven miles high!

Fluffy interiors

Of course they cheated, they were on a plane heading to that Caribbean idyll, Saint Kitts & Nevis … poor dears! After several glasses of champs and having just finished watching Ken Loach’s highly poignant film “I, Daniel Blake”, about life under the Tory benefit cuts, this happened. “Flying at 38,000ft with an outside temperature of minus 56 Centigrade, and 53 minutes before Antigua the moment arrived. Afternoon tea was served – not just sandwiches and cakes but also scones! We cannot possibly formally judge the scones but they were warm, crisp on the outside with fluffy interiors and were served with Rodda’s Classic Cornish Cream and Wilkin & Sons strawberry jam. As we enjoyed them we could not but think of how fortunate we are in contrast to the next generation of Daniel Blakes”.

Intergalactic scones

Fortunate indeed! But when will our correspondents learn? If they want their scones judged formally they have to to take us with them?

Scone at 38,000 feet — A seven mile high scone

We were tempted to go one better and book a Virgin Galactic space flight. We’ve had some nice light scones but never completely weightless ones. At over 60 miles high that would have to be a new record! When we phoned them however they could not give a definitive answer on whether or not they would be serving scones. Heyho, we won’t bother! In the meantime we eagerly await further reports on Caribbean scones being filed.

Scones, history and a dollop of politics