Tag Archives: Brexit

Ordinary, Scones

Café Belgica revisited

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Me on a cherrypicker
That’s me in the cherrypicker bucket

You know how sometimes your day doesn’t quite start the way you expected. That’s what happened this morning. Before I had even had breakfast I found myself dangling high in the air over Falkirk High Street. It’s a long story.  But more to the point, how did I get from that situation to Café Belgica in Bo’ness? We should, perhaps, attempt an explanation. 

As soon as we came down stairs a friend was waiting at the front door. He wanted to know if I would like to take some photographs from a very unusual and very temporary viewpoint. In short, he’s renovating a building at the end of the High Street and had hired a cherrypicker for an hour to do some work on the roof. Within a matter of minutes I was up there taking pictures from an angle I have never seen before and am probably never likely to see again. Fortunately I had Lee, a very experienced operator with me. For me it was an unusual but great experience! My biggest concern, however, was whether I would get back down in time to go to the cinema which had been our original plan for the morning.

Compassion
Internal view of the Hippodrome
The Hippodrome

No worries, we made it to our local Hippodrome picture palace in time to see a Ken Loach film called ‘The Old Oak‘. It’s a beautifully crafted compassionate movie about a village in northern England where the coal mine has long since closed and the people have next to nothing. The only thing left open is a very dilapidated pub, The Old Oak. It’s the only place for people to meet. When Syrian refugees arrive, however, tensions rise. There are some very ugly scenes but eventually basic human compassion for others who also have nothing wins the day. It should be compulsory viewing for all.Internal view of Café Belgica

Sliding downhill

When we emerged back into the daylight it was lunchtime and after a short visit to the Bo’ness library we ended up here at Café Belgica which is housed in a huge furniture warehouse. It’s over five years since we were last here and back then we were bemoaning the Winter Olympics. They were being held in South Korea. In particular we were debating the merits of ‘skeleton’ (sliding downhill head first on a sledge) or ‘luge’ (sliding downhill feet first on a sledge). We wondered if there was much more than a handful of people in the world participating in either. The UK was still in the EU at that time and we offered a gold medal to anyone who could keep it that way. Regrettably, of course, we didn’t award any medals!

We had a delicious lunch and afterwards they offered us plain or cheese scones. A scone at Café BelgicaHaving slightly overindulged already it was a cheese scone to share. The service throughout had been cheery and efficient so we soon had our scone. It was presented with lots of butter and jam but we never feel that jam is appropriate for a cheese scone so it was just butter. All in all we thoroughly enjoyed our visit. No topscone but enjoyable nevertheless.

Making sense

Now it seems incredible that we despaired over something as trivial as the Winter Olympics. Today we look out onto a world where there is much more to despair about. Earlier we had seen an fabulous  movie about the strength of human spirit and compassion. A couple of weeks ago, we experienced Pat’s McMillan Coffee Morning where people’s generosity and kindness raised £3,500. All to try and make people’s lives a little better. But here we are in 2023 and  in Gaza and Ukraine all we see is people deliberately trying to kill each other. It’s bewildering and incredibly sad!

A view along Falkirk High street
Early morning view of Falkirk High street

What makes it even worse is that it’s impossible to see any kind of resolution without a lot more bloodshed. Pathetically, in our comfortable little lives, we cross our fingers!

EH51 0PU         tel: 01506 243954            Café Belgica

///begun,learn,afflicted

Ordinary, Scones

Nosh

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It’s a sure sign that summer is coming to an end. Could it be the lower temperatures, the leaves turning,  or the days shortening? Well yes, but it’s more that we have started going to the movies after breakfast. We enjoy it. It supports our local picture palace and it feels slightly sinful when you come out and it’s only lunchtime. It also allows us to explore the town of Bo’ness and find places like Nosh, the scene for today’s scone.

Internal view of the Hiipodrome cinema
Inside the Hippodrome

We haven’t been here at the Hippodrome, Scotland’s oldest cinema ,since February when we saw ‘Till’, an excellent movie. This time it was ‘The Innocent‘ a French romcom heist caper about stealing a truck load of caviar. Enjoyable enough although subtitles can be hard work when they go rapidly … why do the French speak so quickly? 

In some ways watching a French film in Bo’ness is kind of appropriate. A sign at Nosh in Bo'nessBo’ness was once one of Scotland’s largest ports and would have traded the black stuff (coal not caviar) with France for many centuries. Scotland was France’s oldest ally since the two countries formed the Auld Alliance in 1295 in an attempt to control England’s many invasions. Trade between the two circumvented England and ports like Bo’ness and Leith thrived. It may also explain why Scotland has always thought of itself as much more European than England.

After the film we ended up here in Nosh, one of the few cafés we haven’t visited in the town. It’s located in a building built in 1750 as a tollbooth.

Overdo plaque at Nosh in Bo'ness
Built in 1750 but who were ‘RB’ and ‘EB’?
It’s more of a takeaway place for sandwiches and the like but it does have a few tables.Internal view of Nosh in Bo'ness
 
On the counter, under a glass dome, were two scones individually wrapped in cling film. A scone at Nosh in Bo'nessWe never think this is a good idea. Scones need to breathe after all and sometimes it means that they might not be entirely fresh. Anyway, we ordered one to share as well as a some coffees. Our scone turned out to be not at all bad but a long way off a topscone.
 
Obedience
The Prime Minister has single handedly managed to upset almost everyone by announcing that he is rolling back on his commitment to  green policies. The date for net zero will now be 2035 instead of 2030. Goodness knows what it will be by the time we reach 2030? Right or wrong it does demonstrate this Tory government’s unswerving dedication to screwing things up. It wouldn’t be so serious if there was a better option waiting in the wings, but there isn’t! The only thing the Labour Party, “the opposition” seems to do is support the Tories. Voters are caught between a rock and a hard place.  In Scotland,  after one invasion too many by England, we have no say and just do what we are told!
A watercolour of Nosh in Bo'ness
A watercolour of Nosh’s building
Meanwhile King Charles and Queen Camilla are in France trying to thaw out relationships after the disaster of Brexit. Good luck with that!
 
EH51 0EA            tel: 01506 828151                Nosh FB
 
///taps.dude.something
Ordinary, Scones, self-service

Edenmill Café

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Our short break at the Black Bull in Gartmore has come to an end. It’s been a lot of fun but today we have to head for home … boo! We decided, however to return by a different route and that’s how we came to end up at the Edenmill Café. What took us in the direction of Edenmill was a search for the Devil’s Pulpit. No one quite knew why we had heard of the Devil’s Pulpit except for a vague recollection that it featured in Outlander. It wasn’t easy to find!

Believable?

We should have known we were in the right area, however, because the landscape round here is dominated by the Whangie, a strange rock formation where, many years ago, we used to go for practice rock climbs if we could’t make it as far as Glencoe. Apparently the weird cleft in the rock was formed by Satan’s tail when he rushed round the mountain, late for a witch’s coven. Okay, okay, but let’s face it, if you believe Westminster’s story about Brexit being a wonderful success, you might as well believe this one too! In fact, it’s a lot more believable!

Sacrifices

Anyway, there were no direction signs whatsoever for the Devil’s Pulpit. It was almost as if we weren’t supposed to go there! Eventually we parked in a rough area beside some other cars and reckoned they would be trying to find it as well. All we knew was that it is was”over there somewhere.”Trainers hanging from telegraph lines at Devil's Pulpit

Danger of death

We headed off across a field and knew we must be getting close when we came across some sacrificial offerings hung high on a telegraph wire. No idea why so many trainers were strung up there but hopefully their owners hadn’t come to some dark satanic misfortune. Goodness, it was the devil’s own job trying to find this place. After wandering in all sorts of directions we eventually came on a path through a wood that looked promising. The Devil’s Pulpit is actually an extremely narrow 100ft deep gorge in Finnich Glen. There didn’t seem to be any way to access it that didn’t involve certain and immediate death.

Way down to the Devil's Pulpit
Almost vertical slippery Devil’s Steps with only a rope (thick green string) to hang on to

 A notice saying “Exploring Finnich Glen – Danger of Death or Serious Injury” didn’t really help! And when we did eventually find the ‘official’ access point, it didn’t look at all inviting. Not called the Devil’s Steps for nothing! We could hear the squeals of the youngsters who were half way down and thought that it might not be the best thing for old arthritic codgers like us. Just think of the humiliation having to be rescued … many have had exactly that experience!

the Devil's Pulpit
it’s kind of magical if you can get down there … and back up!
Alpacas

We asked a teenager emerging back up the steps if there were any scones down there. The response was puzzled but negative so that sealed the deal. Enough adventuring, we were off to the  Edenmill Café just a few miles further down the road!

Internal view of EdenmillEdenmill is huge and seems to do all sorts of things. There’s a butcher shop, a soft play area and a bunkhouse as well as the café. Pat wanted to go alpaca trekking but, in the end, the lure of the scones proved too much.

A scone at EdenmillWe placed our order then went outside to sit in the warm spring sunshine. Still feeling the effects of the Black Bull breakfast it was just some coffee and a fruit scone to share. No cream but it was presented with plenty of pre-packed jam and butter and it had nice crunchy exterior we like. We thoroughly enjoyed it but perhaps the sunshine and that feeling you get having narrowly cheated death was enhancing our experience. Maybe a slight exaggeration! Enjoyable but not quite a topscone! Haven’t had a topscone in ages!

Eventually we had to part company with our Trossachs correspondents and make our way back home. They have been brilliant company and now we feel much better acquainted with this part of the world. Look forward to doing it all again sometime.

G63 9AX         tel: 01360 771707      Edenmill

///brains.frosted.loaning

ps: Apparently there is an upcoming £2million pound project to build a large car park, a café, visitor centre and easily accessed viewing platforms at the Devil’s Pulpit. Presumably to cater for all the Outlander fans. We’re happy to have seen it in its raw state. 

Ordinary, Scones

Macmillans Kitchen

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Picture in the Black Bull Inn, GartmoreHonestly,  any connection between this and our previous post from Stirling Bull Sales is purely coincidental. We’re away for a few days to recuperate from the frantic days of retirement. In the depths of the Trossachs and Loch Lomond Country Park there is the little village of Gartmore and the Black Bull Inn where we’re hoping our Trossachs correspondents will join us.

A few years back the community bought the Inn in a bid to keep it open. They have done a great job so we like to support them whenever we can. Before we got to the Black Bull, however, we stopped off at the Benview Garden Centre. The cafe is called Macmillan’s Kitchen.

Internal view of MacMillan's KitchenIt was a beautiful day so we spent a wee while going round the plant area but soon it was scone time. The restaurant is a big friendly place with an eclectic mix of stuff for sale. However, having pre-booked dinner at the Black Bull we didn’t want to spoil our appetite. It was just a toasted sandwich and a scone … sharing both. 

 
Stop off

We thoroughly enjoyed the sandwich and then it was on to the scone. A scone at MacMillan's KitchenNo cream but it did come with Danish butter and some absolutely delicious jam. The scone was good as well. Quite big but with lots of fruit, just like a fruit scone should be. All in all MacMillans Kitchen was good but not quite good enough for a topscone award. Unfortunate, but a super place for a stop off. It was only a short distance to the Black Bull, our home for the next few days 

View from Macmillans Kitchen
Salad days

When we arrived at the Black Bull we were greeted with this notice board advising us to have cocktails rather than a salad.

Notice board at the Black Bull in GartmoreIt’s ironic that nowadays it is almost impossible to make a salad because there’s hardly any of the ingredients in the shops. Where there once was supermarket shelves groaning with tomatoes, lettuce and fruit, now there are mostly empty shelves. Sometimes there are signs informing you that customers are limited to one or two tomatos. All sorts of things are blamed for this. As usual,Putin is the main culprit though just how he managed to steal all our fruit and veg is beyond our comprehension. Sometimes bad weather in Morocco is blamed?

One thing that’s never blamed is Brexit. Never mentioned by the government or the media in spite of there being no similar shortages in the EU. Very odd! Rather than mention the word, Brexit is now referred to as “pre referendum” or “post referendum”. Could it be that the current delicate UK/EU negotiations over the N.Ireland Protocol mean that the word “Brexit” has been outlawed?A sign at MacMillan's Kitchen

“Stories never start with a salad” sounds like an absolute truism. Given we may not even be able to get a salad we will just have to do with cocktails. It’s Putin’s fault! Just as well our Trossachs correspondents have joined us!A sign at MacMillan's Kitchen

G63 0QZ        tel: 01360 850222        Macmillans Kitchen FB

///suiting.realm.trustees

 

Ordinary, Scones

Aran

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In case you think that we are now far away on the Isle of Arran let us assure you that we hardly had to go any distance for this post. Just a short walk into Falkirk town centre, in fact. Those of you who already speak Scottish Gaelic will know that Aran is Gaelic for ‘bread’. For those who don’t know Gaelic you’ve learned something already. Here’s something else. This place used to be called Coffee on Wooer because it’s situated at the junction of Tollbooth Street and Wooer Street (derived from Weaver Street). We reviewed that back in 2016 and it did not turn out well.

Back then when we asked for a scone the chap behind the counter picked one up and tried, unsuccessfully, to penetrate it with a fork. We like them crunchy on the outside but there’s a limit. He even said “I wouldn’t if I was you“! After that it was a vegan cafe called “The Wooer” and that wasn’t much of an improvement.  This latest incarnation, Aran, has only been going a couple of months but would it be any better?Internal view of Aran

From the outside it looks much the same as it’s always done. Inside it is much improved, however, if a little on the sparse side. We were greeted with a cheery “hi” as soon as we walked through the door. Things were looking up already! We had arranged to have some lunch a little later so at this point we just wanted a scone to share. They do have a nice menu, however, that prides itself on its locally sourced produce. There were plain scones available but we opted for our usual fruit.

Fresh

A scone at AranIt wasn’t long before the lovely young lady looking after us had us all sorted with a tea, a coffee and a scone. No cream unfortunately but at least the little pots of jam and butter looked as if they could be local produce … yeah! The scones tasted deliciously fresh. And, when we asked, we were assured that they’re baked in their own kitchen each and every morning. In the past, we’ve not had good experiences here so this was all rather wonderful. Not quite topscone but about as close as you can get.  Well done Aran, a vast improvement on your predecessors, keep up the good work!

Sunny uplands?

What wasn’t so wonderful was the recent Autumn Statement delivered by our new Chancellor, Jeremy Hunt. The Tories pride themselves on being the sensible party when it comes to government and fiscal responsibility. It’s their USP … they know how to run things! Yet, after twelve years in power, we are being told to expect the biggest drop in living standards in over fifty years. Everyone is going to be considerably poorer. We are also the only member of the G7 countries to have a smaller economy now than it had before the pandemic. In other words we are going backwards at a rate of knots. Gosh, can you imagine what it would be like if we had a government that didn’t know what it was doing??

On the upside, they say that after a few years of abject misery we will return to the sunny uplands again. That’ll be the same sunny uplands we were promised after Brexit? We’re still waiting!Logo of Aran

There’s another Aran in nearby Linlithgow. It’s run by the same people so we may have to try that as well. Just to relieve the abject misery which is to be wrought upon us , if nothing else.

FK1 1NJ        tel: 01506 844477         Aran FB   

///vibrate.buck.pepper

Scones, Top

Murrayshall House

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After our disastrous non-scone in our previous post from Patricia’s Coffee Bar in Glasgow we thought we should try and do something to redeem ourselves. So, what better way on a scone blog than to come to Scone itself. Welcome to Scone signNow a word of warning to those unaware of the nuances of Scottish pronunciation. When you see ‘scone’ as in ‘scone blog’ it is pronounced ‘scone,’ as in ‘gone’. However when you see ‘Scone’ as in the village of ‘Scone’, it is pronounced ‘skoon’ as in ‘soon’. Murrayshall House is on the outskirts of the village.

No mean feat!

Just to the west is the village of Old Scone where all the Kings of Scotland used to be crowned. They would sit on the Stone of Scone, a large rectangular block of sandstone carved with a Celtic cross. It is perhaps better known as the Stone of Destiny. In 1296 Edward I stole it and placed it in Westminster Abbey as a throne for English Kings … how very dare they!! However, in 1950 a group of plucky Scottish students ‘repatriated’ it back to Scotland and created a right royal rumpus in the process. It weighs 152kg so no mean feat.

A year or so later the police found it in Arbroath and replaced in Westminster Abbey. However, there are doubts regarding its authenticity. Some think a copy had  been made and deliberately left in Arbroath to be found. The real stone, of course, still being at large. If it isn’t authentic does that make any coronation created on it, null and void? Interesting!

Borrowers

The last monarch to use the real one was Elizabeth I of Scotland, sometimes known outside of Scotland as Elizabeth II. After much protest In Scotland, the UK government grudgingly agreed that the stone should be located back to where it belonged. There was a proviso, however, that they get it back for future coronations. It currently resides in Edinburgh Castle alongside the Scottish Crown Jewels. Next year it’s supposed to be moved again. This time to Perth … almost back in Scone. 

Enough about stones, what about the scones at Murrayshall House. Hopefully they would not bear any resemblance to the Stone of Scone.

The house is certainly rather grand and has views over the Perthsire countryside to match .View from Murrayshall House

27?

It was built in 1664 and was home to numerous Lords, Barons, Earls, Viscounts and other chinless wonders until the 1970s when it was turned into a hotel. The previous owners, poor dears, had to move to nearby Scone Palace. Nowadays, riffraff like us are allowed over the doorstep. The grounds at Murrayshall are lovely and extensive enough to easily accommodate a 27 hole golf course…is that not too many holes?Internal view of Murrayshall House

Our room came complete with a grand piano, though with everyone experiencing staff shortages due to Brexit, there was no one playing it. The young girl looking after us was very pleasant and soon had us sorted with a fandangled contraption bearing our afternoon tea.Afternoon tea at Murrayshall House There was plenty of sandwiches, quiches  and cakes alongside a separate plate bearing four scones. Often, in places like this you get a tea menu but not here. It was just plain ordinary tea, take it or leave it … and that’s just fine by us. Needless to say there was much more food than our tiny tummies could accommodate. We had to pace ourselves on the sandwiches in order to leave room for the scones. Scones at Murrayshall House

They were really nice and came with little pots of Scottish jam … yegh! The clotted cream, however, was made by a Dutch company in England?? There were a few downsides to this afternoon tea but we eventually decided that the scones just scraped into the topscone category. Well done Murrayshall House.

The library at Murrayshall House
the library
Rwanda and Eurovision

The Commonwealth Games have started amidst great celebration in Birmingham. We were more than a little surprised, however, to learn that Rwanda is competing. Especially since that country has never had the pleasure of being part of the great British Empire. Seems on a par with Australia competing in the Eurovision Song Contest. Maybe Rwanda will be able to take part in that too? Since the cornerstone of Commonwealth membership is human rights, Rwanda’s inclusion is even more puzzling. Could it be linked in any way to Westminster’s decision to send refugees and asylum seekers to Rwanda just to get rid of them? Perish the thought!

Never mind all that, we just feel sorry for the poor sods who, on reaching the 18th  hole here, find they still have another nine to go. And … talk about destiny, England have just won the football at the Women’s EURO 2022, so there’s something to talk about for the next fifty years. Well done England! You can have the Stone back  for Charles’s coronation but only if you ask nicely!

PH2 7PH         01738 55 11 71     Murrayshall House Hotel

///fault.pheasants.scam

Ordinary, Scones

Deanston Distillery

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Okay we haven’t posted for a while so this one may contain a slightly bigger rant than normal. Let’s face it we are hardly short of things to rant about.

When we named this post Deanston Distillery we had forgotten that we had reviewed the tearoom before. It’s called the Coffee Bothy but that was six years ago so it’s about time we checked it out again. Last time we were here we were able to watch sandpipers on the banks of the river Teith which runs by the distillery. None this time but we did see some grey wagtails and they are always nice to see as well.

Perfect circles

Five shilling note in Deanston money
Five shilling note in Deanston money.

Previously we told you that the workers, when it was a cotton mill, were paid in ‘Deanston money.’ This ‘money’ could be exchanged for goods in the village shop which was owned by …  you guessed it, the mill owner. A perfect monetary circle. In our previous post we also explained that the distillery was originally a flax mill, then a cotton mill before eventually being transformed into a distillery in 1965. It’s owned by the South African based Distell Group that also owns Bunnahabbhain distillery and Tobermory distillery … hallowed names in the whisky world.

Burke and Hare

What on earth could that notorious pair, who murdered lots of people and sold their bodies to medical science, have to do with this sleepy little village? Well, not a lot directly, however, Burke’s wife Helen had to adopt an itinerant way of life after her husband was hanged in Edinburgh before a crowd of 20,000 in 1829. She was acquitted but in the eyes of the people she was guilty by association. Described as “An Unfortunate Female of the Degraded Class” she was unable to settle because when folk discovered her identity there would be angry riots and attempts on her life.

Eventually she took up with a spinner at Deanston cotton mill but had only been there three days before she was discovered. A band of women strangled and crushed her to death in a most barbarous way. Luckily, times have changed, our welcome at the Coffee Bothy was very warm and friendly.Internal view of Deanston Distillery

Taken aback

Anyway, enough of murders and dastardly deeds. After some lunch we asked for a fruit scone to share. At the Coffee Bothy, the scones always come in pairs making sharing very easy. When we asked the young girl who was looking after us if she had made the scones she simply replied “Yes”. A scone at Deanston DistilleryWe were taken aback. Normally that question is greeted with giggles but followed by the information on who did actually make them. It’s a useful way of finding out if they are made in-house or bought-in.

They were nicely presented and the size of each scone was perfect for us to have one each. We weren’t too sure about the cream, it could have been scooshie but it had quite good consistency so we weren’t sure. The scones themselves were really nice but unfortunately just fell short of our top award. Hats off to all young girls making scones though!

Has the world gone nuts

… or is it just us? In our previous post from the Coffee Bothy we compared the UK economy to the “Angel’s Share”.

Red deer playing a musical instrument
talented wildlife in Doune

That’s a term used to describe the gradual evaporation that takes place over many years from whisky barrels. Eventually there is nothing left in the barrel bu, a few angels have become very happy in the process, analogous to our economy under a Tory government. Some make millions while others have to rely on food banks. After the debacle over Rishi Sunak’s wife’s non-dom status that would have saved her over £4.4 million in tax. Poor dear we wonder if she even had to work for half a day to earn that sort of money. Now, however, other cabinet ministers are refusing to disclose their tax status. In Norway tax returns are a matter of public record. Goodness, can you ever imagine that happening here?

World beaters

Boris Johnson and Priti Patel have hatched a ‘world beating’ to send, at vast expense, refugees that land in the UK to Rwanda, one of the poorest countries in the world. There they can be processed before the people traffickers transport them back to the UK in tiny rubber boats. What kind of twisted mind comes up with that as a solution to anything? Are we going to do that for Ukrainian refugees as well?

Display of Deanston whiskyRussian TV gets a lot of criticism because it simply does the government’s bidding. The BBC might be going exactly the same way. When discussing all the many reasons for the UK’s economic predicament, one of the most obvious reasons is never ever mentioned …. Brexit. It’s as though it has been totally expunged for the BBC vocabulary. It’s almost as if it never happened?

Okay, it might be us that’s nuts! But we have to say that there is something strangely comforting about eating scones surrounded by vast quantities of whisky. Not sure what it is but we do recommend it.

External view of Deanston House
Deanston House which used to be the home of the mill owner

FK16 6AG      tel: 01786 843010      Deanston distillery

///awoke.hobbies.happen

A scone at the Pier cafe at StronachlacherPS: lo and behold our ever vigilant Trossachs correspondents have sprung back into life with news from the Pier tearoom in Stronachlachar. We know it well and there can’t be many more scenic places to have a scone than here. We haven’t been for a long time so it was great to hear that their standards had not slipped.

Hot cross scones?

And that’s not all. One of our Kiwi correspondents has sent news of a hot cross scone in Mapua, Tasman at the northern end of the South Island. External view of Deanston DistilleryIt’s a new one on us! He got it at a streetside stall with an honesty box. We love honesty boxes but unfortunately our correspondent reports that “it was average  and a bit on the heavy side and the cross part tasted  leathery like an old boot lace“. Oh dear, thank goodness they’re in New Zealand and not here.

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

Klondyke Garden Centre

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It’s that time of year again! Although we have reviewed Klondyke Garden Centre several times before, it has changed so much that we feel another review is justified. We’re not apologising … Boris doesn’t have to apologise for anything so why should we? 

Choice

It’s our annual compost fix we’re after. If we don’t get it the rest of the year will definitely not go as well as it would have done otherwise. We try to restrict it to once a year … we’re not addicts … it’s for the garden. Actually, it’s for our rhubarb which we are in the process of transplanting from the garden into large pots. Reminds me of one of my dad’s favourite stories about a man passing a mental hospital pushing a barrowload of manure. An inmate pokes his head through the railings and asks him what he is going to do with it. “I’m going to put it on my rhubarb” he replied. “Oh” the inmate said “You should come in here we get custard on ours“. Okay, okay! It remains to be seen how well our rhubarb will do in pots … it’s a high risk strategy!External view of Topiary restaurant Klondyke

Anyway, over the past year or so, much work has been done at this garden centre. The car park is now vast and the centre itself is much bigger than it used to be. As well as a huge area dedicated to plants there are gift shops, clothes shops, a shoe shop and even a car wash. All this choice can be kind of bewildering and choosing  compost is no exception … ericatious, John Innes, Miracle Gro, peat free, big bag, wee bag … argh!

Internal view of Topiary restaurant Klondyke
Just part one section of the restaurant/cafe area
Technology

Unsurprisingly perhaps, it wasn’t long before the lure of the cafe became overpowering. Crikey, it’s. gone huge as well. Order and Pay at Topiary restaurant KlondykeIn our previous review we tried to use their new fandangled phone ‘Order & Pay’ system. It seemed to work but after waiting for twenty minutes for our order to appear we realised something had gone wrong. When we asked a member of staff she just said “no problem,  I can take your order” … argh! This time we ordered at the self service counter but they still seem to be using the same phone system at the tables. It must work sometimes so might try it again next time.

The  scones were quite big so we decided to share. Expectations were not exactly high but we were pleasantly surprised. A scone at Topiary restaurant KlondykeIt tasted remarkably fresh and came complete with some English jam and Danish butter. The cream was whipped and nicely presented in a little glass jar. We actually swithered momentarily about a topscone but decided that the complete package just wasn’t quite right. But a bIg improvement on previous visits. Keep up the good work Klondyke Garden Centre … it’s all very impressive.

Wallpaper at restaurant Klondyke
Wallpaper in the cafe area

Also impressive is the new Falkirk Distillery which is right next door to the garden centre. External view of Falkirk distilleryIt’s due to open its doors for the first time later in the year and who knows it may even serve scones in its restaurant. Exciting or what?

Trumpian?

Last time we were here in 2020 Boris Johnson was visiting Scotland. He reminded us how grateful we should be for the block grant … a gift from England!? He also said he had an “oven ready deal” for Brexit and Gove was proclaiming Brexit as the “easiest deal in history”. We all know that now, as we did then, they needn’t have bothered wasting their breath. With his administration still deep in the proverbial doodoo his latest imbecilic utterances about Keir Starmer and Jimmy Savile do not bode well for how any upcoming elections will be conducted. Looks very Trumpian to us! 

All is not lost though, just as we were all about to lose faith in government of any kind, up pops ex PM and arch Tory, Sir John Major, to tell it like it is … or rather, how it should be! A Tory with a brain and a heart … whatever next?

We’ll keep you posted on the rhubarb!

FK2 0XS          tel: 01324 717035          Klondyke

///staple.reap.rooms

And just when you thought the world could not get any crazier, we came across this car with a banana stuck up its exhaust. What’s that all about?Banana in car exhaust

Later still, I watched as a flock of siskins fought and squabbled over a load of sunflower hearts. Totally illogical because there was more than enough for them all. Unfortunately though, when it comes to our planet’s resources, we are all just siskins. That should have been a Tweet really?

Ordinary, Scones

4 Coo Wynd

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Although 4 Coo Wynd is only a few minutes walk from our home it’s three years since we were last here. Goodness, a lot has happened since then! Back then we were bemoaning the fact that businesses in Falkirk didn’t seem to last. This place was called Cafe Trio back then and before that it was Sorocha’s and before that it was Mathiesons and before that, in 2003, it was Sleeves … a record shop – remember them? Having said all that, 4 Coo Wynd is right next door to Thomas Johnston Butchers, established in 1861, so what on earth are we going on about??

A view of the Cow Wynd, Falkirk
Cow Wynd with Santa overhead

Three years ago we were debating the important issues of the day e.g. what jam to have with a treacle scone and would Brexit have an effect on the scone supplies. The answer to the first question was ‘none’, just butter is best. Brexit hadn’t yet happened but we were looking forward to the promised sunny uplands. Still waiting! Didn’t bother discussing COVID-19 because we had never heard of it!Logo of 4 Coo Wynd

Back to the present. For the benefit of our far flung readers we should perhaps explain the name “4 Coo Wynd”. Artists impression of a highland cowIt is simply the address of the cafe which, more accurately is 4 ‘Cow’ Wynd. Coo is simply Scottish pronunciation of “cow”. In the 18th century, Falkirk Tryst was the biggest cattle market in the country. The town was a rumbustious place in those days. However, there is more to Falkirk than just cows … much more.

  • This was as far north as the Romans got. They liked it so much they decided to settle here, a sort of shangrila. Emperor Antoninus even built a wall across Scotland and through the town to protect it from less civilised influences. Traces of this period can still be found with the ice cream parlours scattered around the town?
  • Falkirk has seen two major battles. The first, in 1298, was one of the major battles in the First War of Scottish Independence … can you believe it’s still going on? The second was in 1746, the penultimate battle fought on British soil but fought for the same reason as the first.
  • In 1565 the marriage agreement between Mary Queen of Scots and the Dauphin of France was signed at Callendar House. She would become Queen of France as well as Scotland.
  • In the 18th century the town became the heart of the iron industry with 61 foundries. Starting with munitions for the Battle of Trafalgar to the famous red telephone boxes still found all around the world. The inventiveness of these foundries making baths, stoves and sanitary ware led to massive increases in public health and comfort.
  • Now the town has the Falkirk Wheel and the Kelpies and shortly, two distilleries … what’s not to like?
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A scone at 4 Coo WyndOkay, okay, the world owes a great deal to Falkirk but can we just get on with scones, we hear you cry! We decided to start with a bacon roll from their all-day-breakfast menu, followed by a fruit scone. Probably the best bacon rolls we have ever tasted … excellent! The scone was very good too but, unfortunately just not quite good enough to make the topscone grade. Shame, the service was warm and friendly, we thoroughly enjoyed our visit to 4 Coo Wynd.Internal view of 4 Coo Wynd

Predictions

Given the current fiasco that passes for UK government we, perhaps, shouldn’t be all that surprised at the predictions of a recent  poll. It says that, at the next election, ALL Scottish MPs at Westminster will be from the Scottish National Party. We did mention earlier that the first battle of Falkirk in 1298 was during the Wars of Scottish Independence. Soooo, do you think that, if this prediction actually came to pass, it would make any difference? Of course not!

Falkirk High Street
the High Street

Three years ago we also reviewed a scone from Passiontree Velvet in Toowoomba, Queensland. These were the heady days of unrestricted travel and bountiful scones all over the world … ahh, the memories! Once again it looks like our scone adventuring has been brought to a shuddering halt by COVID-19. 4 Coo Wynd will probably be our last for a while. That means we need to take this opportunity to wish all our readers a very merry Christmas and a happy, healthy and prosperous 2022 when it comes. You have put up with our rants for a very long time, best wishes to you all!

FK1 1PL       Tel: 07477 173117        4 Coo Wynd

///deep.tricky.shower

Scones, Top

Vera Artisan Bakery

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Logo of Vera Artisan BakeryThe Laird got in touch to say that Vera Artisan Bakery in Stirling might be worth a visit. The Laird (full title Laird of Dumyat) is an avid sconey and the only member of the aristocracy willing to lower himself to our level so we value his judgement. Internal view of Vera Artisan Bakery

Display case at Vera Artisan Bakery
Pies and cakes all made here

The first thing you notice walking into Vera Artisan bakery is that it is quite small, only three tables. But you also notice its light bright interior and the two large display cabinets full of little wonders. And you don’t have to be here very long however before you notice something else … it’s a happy place!

Toasted
our server at Vera Artisan Bakery
our happy server

There’s great cheerful banter between the staff working behind the counter in the bakery itself and those out front serving the likes of us. These days when lots of places get swallowed up by large multinationals, it’s delightful to come across a small independent and apparently thriving  enterprise like this. We decided to share some lunch and do the same with a fruit scone for afters.  Everything was great but then it came to the scone. “Would we care for it to be toasted?” Why not? It duly appeared, toasty warm and accompanied with nice wee pots of jam and cream.

My dad used to say sarcastically of some of my mum’s baking efforts “It won’t need pegging down”. Well this scone almost needed pegging down,  it was so light. Overall, very nice indeed.A scone at Vera Artisan Bakery

After no deliberation at all we decided to award a top scone. Well done Vera Artisan Bakery. This place could be described as small, beautiful, happy and independent … words that could be describing Scotland in a few years time?

We feel there is something odd going on in government and the media at the moment. Surprise, surprise we hear you say! In spite of an abundance of supply problems, no-one seems willing to mention Brexit as a possible cause. They cast around looking for reasons for staffing shortages but seem allergic to using the ‘B’ word. Very strange, like it’s a taboo word.

Britain is also the only country in western Europe to have decreasing exports over the past year. Must be the weather! Anyway as long as places like Vera continue to thrive, we’ll be okay. Many thanks to the Laird for the heads-up.

FK8 1NA         tel: 07928 140636       Vera Artisan 

///jelly.sings.oppose

A scone in Cheadleps Our newly appointed Cheshire correspondents sent this picture of their scone at John Lewis in Cheadle Royal shopping centre in Greater Manchester. Apart from a comment saying it was ‘delightful’ there was no further information.  They are rookies after all so we have to make allowances. Many thanks, great first effort!

///pardon.grit.fell