Tag Archives: Blackness Castle

Lobster Pot

18 January 2025 billpaterson1@me.com 3 Comments

We don’t understand why it’s been about five years since we last reported from the Lobster Pot in Blackness on Sea. It’s only a twenty minute drive and with its lighthearted approach to life and its cornucopia of artefacts. It’s always a joy to visit and it even has the village shop . We must do it more often?

There’s a sign on the way into the pub which boldly says “KEEP SCOTLAND WEIRD” and the interior decor of the place certainly does its best to maintain that ethos. There’s mermaids, figureheads, ropes and pulleys everywhere. It’s definitely weird but in a nice way. The walls and ceilings are covered in paintings and items, mostly with a nautical theme. If you have the time to look at everything you can discover a lot of the local history.

For a small village of less than one hundred inhabitants it definitely punches above its weight.

Blackness Castle, built in 1440 and known as “the ship that never sailed” because from the seaward side it looks like a huge battleship … it proved an effective deterrent to German U-Boats

The Duchess

As well the Lobster Pot it boasts an Outlander Castle, sandy beaches, a promenade, a pier, a sailing club and even a naturist swimming group.

A picture at the Lobster Pot — The swimming group may have been started by the Duchess of Argyle judging by this picture!

Not only this but now the pub has set up a distillery next door … the Blackness Bay distillery. What more could you ask for? It’s tiny and hasn’t been going long enough to produce whisky but it does do an interesting range of Blackness Bay rums. When they do produce whisky in a couple of years it will be called “Mary Queen of Scotch”. It’s never going to compete with the Johnnie Walkers of this world but that’s not the point. It will be fun and maybe a bit weird. But while we’re waiting they have a new make spirit called “Virgin Mary”. And as if all that wasn’t enough they do scones as well!

After a walk along the beach we decided some lunch was required. I had a sandwich full of crab, prawns and lobster. When I say full, I mean FULL! Not easy to eat neatly. It came with a salad and a tin cup full of delicious chips. They didn’t have cream so the scone, when it arrived, just had butter and jam and unfortunately none of it was local. The scone wasn’t easy to eat neatly either. Because it was quite warm the butter melted and then the scone tended to fall apart. Nowhere near a topscone but it didn’t detract from a really enjoyable visit.

Futility of life

The pub has held a poetry competition. According to the website “The older locals gather with the landlord to quietly contemplate the futility of human existence without as much as a poem to tell future generations of the glory that once was Blackness on Sea“. The rules stated that it had to mention the pub and the village though not necessarily in complimentary terms. A £1000 prize for the winning entry meant there were 270 entries. The winning submission by Arran Potts was called “Come Away In“.

Sage advice

With the Donald getting his feet under the desk in the Oval Office again on Monday this sign seemed like apt advice for the rest of the world.

And another sign in the garden of the Lobster Pot.

EH49 7NL tel: 01506 830086 Lobster Pot

///work.deflection.limelight

ps; last time we were here we asked for the meaning behind this diorama. So far no one was brave enough to offer one.

A diorama at the Lobster Pot — It contains a fisherman pointing at a cooked lobster on top of a creel, five bottles of Guinness, a terrier dog wearing wellington boots and a large snake wound around a naked lady.

If there is some deep meaning in this allegory then hopefully some reader might decipher it? No prize but huge kudos.

Scones, Uncategorized

Girdle scones

3 March 2021 billpaterson1@me.com 9 Comments

If you are wondering where the girdle scones are in the title photo, they are in the tummies of the two mini-Vikings. We went the short distance to Blackness Castle for a picnic and they had girdle scones filled with ham and cheese. It was definitely a top girdle scone award according to them.

One of our mini-Vikings was born in Norway and is super proud of that. The other minnier-Viking was born in England and is super proud of that. As they read the information boards the miniest-Viking became troubled by the realisation that this castle, which she loved, had spent a lot of time under attack by the English. She is half Scottish but we could see that she was seriously conflicted. Quite tricky for a five year old. Mind you, us older ones weren’t too happy about Oliver Cromwell wrecking it in 1650 either. All that was completely forgotten, however, when the picnic was produced.

Fussy pigeons

Anyway lets go back to the beginning. Since we have been expanding reader’s sconological education with traditional oven scones and more recently drop scones and tattie scones, Pat thought she should have a go at girdle scones. The last time she tried them was when we were first married and living in a first floor flat in Edinburgh. We always put our stale bread out on the window sill for the birds. When the girdle scones didn’t turn out too well we put them out as well. Not even the pigeons would take them. This memory was still vivid as she launched into this second attempt.

Happily, years of baking experience meant there was a much happier outcome this time around. If they look a bit like tatties scones that’s because they are quite similar except, of course, there are no potatoes in girdle scones and there is a little baking powder to make them rise.

ways to eat girdle scones — girdle scone with ham and cheese and next day with fry up … yum

Many years ago, when I was a mere sapling of a student, I worked as a labourer in the oil refinery at Grangemouth during college holidays. Every morning a truck would pick me up in Falkirk High Street. It had a tin hut thing on the back. There was no door but inside there were wooden benches running down each side. A little bit later the truck would stop at a model lodging house where a squad of Irish navvies would climb on board and join me in the hut. These guys regarded puny students as fair game so I probably got more than my fair share of ragging but really, they were the salt of the earth.

A singular woman

I tell you this simply because the lodging house had a woman who came in and made the men their packed lunches. I’ll never forget it because every day it was exactly the same. They all had a full girdle scone filled with great slabs of red cheddar cheese. For all the months I worked there I never saw them eat anything else. Suffice to say that Pat’s second attempt at girdle scones was much much better than the first.

A mystery

In spite of the delicate nature of Anglo/Scot relations our visit to Blackness was great fun. But it highlighted an ongoing problem that we were totally unable to resolve. How to get the miniest-Viking to wear a jacket in a way that covered more than just her forearms?

If anyone has any suggestions we would be delighted to hear them.

Just as Scotland enters a phase where it has its best ever chance of achieving the same respect that all independent nations take for granted, it is beset by a scandal. It revolves around personalities and technicalities of who said what to who, where and when. No bearing whatsoever on Scotland’s case for independence but with the media in a feeding frenzy, it undoubtedly will. Fingers crossed good sense prevails.

the beach at Blackness Castle — Jacket problem final solution … removed it

Ordinary, Scones

The Lobster Pot

18 December 2019 billpaterson1@me.com 6 Comments

Although Blackness is not far from home we haven’t visited much in the past ten years. Why? Because the pub closed down and it’s a dead end road so there was nowhere to go when you got here. You could go for a walk, visit the castle but that was about all. It was tragic because Blackness itself is lovely with a nice beach and a nice castle but it needed the pub.

Blackness Castle on a December day — Blackness Castle in December

However, our doughty Trossachs correspondents tipped us off that the pub had reopened and was worth a visit. And they weren’t wrong.

A brisk day

First though a little bit about the castle that has stood here for over 500 years. Sometimes known as the Ship That Never Sailed because, from the seaward side it looks like a great battleship. When German submarine U-21 ventured up the River Forth in 1914 that’s what they thought they saw when they raised their periscope. They decided to venture no further. Having walked along to the castle on what might be best described as a brisk day, we were in need of sustenance.

When you enter the Lobster Pot the sign above the door “We’re All Doomed” gives a hint of what’s to follow. The interior is lovely and warm with a very welcome open fire at one end. It is a bar/restaurant which also incorporates “The Wee Shop”. You can buy your loaf, your cornflakes, your pint and have a meal all in the same place … brilliant! There is a veritable cornucopia of paraphernalia virtually everywhere you look. On the ceiling directly above our table was this lifebelt. In the unlikely event of us ever going on a cruise, we want two of these please.

Who needs cream?

The Lobster Pot has only been open since August and it must be a welcome return for the village. All the staff were very friendly and soon had us sorted with some lunch and a couple of fruit scones. Initially they said that cream was no problem but later said that it was. Not to worry butter and jam would do just fine … we can rough it!

The scones and tea arrived after a perfect lunch. Unfortunately they did not live up to the standards we had already come to expect of the place. Enjoyable enough but just a tad on the stodgy side. The jam was from England and the butter from Ireland … what can we say? Nevertheless, the Lobster Pot is an excellent pub and we will be visiting Blackness much more often as a result. We hope it goes from strength to strength.

When Robert Burns was visiting the area in 1787 he had been obliged to leave nearby Bo’ness after calling it “That dirty ugly place Barrowstounnes” . He sought refuge here and was duly impressed because he wrote this poem “Blackness Is Braw” (Blackness is Superduper). Perhaps it was the ladies bathing in the mineral rich sediment of Blackness Bay (they still do it) that impressed him most. He always had an eye for the ladies after all!

This vintage photo of Blackness fishermen in 1919 was hanging on the wall. Amongst them there’s Ewan ‘Muffy’ McLachlan, George ‘Rasher’ Redmond, ‘Raving Ross’ Rintoul, ‘Mad Jack’ Melville and ‘Dark Drew’ Storer. It could easily be mistaken for a modern day picture of Boris’s new Conservative cabinet. We think, however, that we would rather be governed by ‘Mad Jack’ and his crew.

Help, please!

Before we leave the Lobster Pot perhaps you could help us with this? Close to where we were seated was this little boxed diorama. As you will be aware a diorama is a three-dimensional scene used to creatively express learning. However, we were stumped by this. What were we supposed to learn? It contains a fisherman pointing at a cooked lobster on top of a creel, five bottles of Guinness, a terrier dog wearing wellington boots and a large snake wound around a naked lady. There is some deep meaning here but we are perplexed. Perhaps some readers may have a greater insight?

No more scones until 2020 so while you are pondering naked ladies, snakes and lobsters may we take this opportunity to wish you all a very merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New Year. Many thanks for your indulgence during the past year.

EH49 7NL tel: 01506 830086 Lobster Pot

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Scones, Top

Coffee Bothy – revisited

6 December 2019 billpaterson1@me.com 3 Comments

In the late 16th century, Lady Doune of Doune Castle, otherwise known as Margaret Campbell, must have been a formidable woman indeed. Her son was known as the Bonnie Earl of Moray because of his good looks, athleticism, skill on the dance floor and his love of scones. Haven’t been able to verify this last claim but we just think he would have been an avid sconey. However, these attributes ended up making him an enemy of King James VI whose Queen, Anne of Denmark, was paying too much attention to the Bonnie Earl. Unfortunately the King was a Boris-like knock-kneed slobbering individual with none of the charms of the young Earl. Eventually, James got the Earl of Huntly, otherwise known as the Cock o’ the North, to take “whatever measures necessary” against Moray.

Best laid plans

In 1592, Huntly contrived to burn Moray to death by setting fire to another of Moray’s country seats at Donibristle in Fife. Moray fled with his head on fire but was struck down by Huntly’s men. Huntly drew his dirk and slashed Moray across the face. The Bonnie Earl’s last words were “You, Huntly – you have spoiled a better face than your own!”. Ouch! Definitely a sconey!

Now this may sound a bit like modern day politics. Unbelievably, Huntly, the King and everyone else associated with the dastardly deed denied all knowledge. Sound familiar? We now think that the Duke of York’s current memory problems may actually be a hereditary affliction affecting all aristocracy. No doubt due to centuries of in-breeding! It’s just a thought but maybe we should cut him some slack … or maybe not?

Mothers

Moray’s mum, Lady Doune wasn’t having any of it and sought to expose all concerned. She had her son’s naked, stabbed and mutilated body put on display in the Kirk of Leith. A painting of the body was made for exhibition. She had his blood stained shirt paraded through the streets of Edinburgh. The outrage was such that the King had to go into hiding for a while in Glasgow and Huntly was imprisoned at Blackness Castle. That’s mothers for you.

Internal view of the Coffee Bothy atDeanston Distillery, Doune

Anyway, all this is simply to tell you that today we are in Doune visiting one of Pat’s favourite shops. After a couple of hours of fairly intensive retail therapy, however, we were both in dire need of a scone. So on this -4ºC frosty day we decided to head a few hundred yards along the River Teith to the café at Deanston Distillery. Almost three years since we were last at the Coffee Bothy. so it was due a quality check anyway.

External view of Deanston Distillery, Doune

The last time we were here the scones came as a brace and that is still the case.

A scone at the Coffee Bothy at Deanston Distillery, Doune

They are quite small but if you want to try two different types, this is the answer. Unfortunately, on this occasion they only had fruit left so that wasn’t an option. Plenty of jam and whipped cream as well so the Coffee Bothy did not disappoint second time around. Just a smidgen off topscones but very enjoyable nevertheless.

You never know the minute

In our last post about the Coffee Bothy we were lamenting the fact that Deanston distillery (about 20 miles from Falkirk) had become the closest to home. It used to be Rosebank distillery (a few hundred yards away) but it closed in 1993. It had produced Scotland’s most light and floral whisky and came to define Lowland whiskies in general. Since then, however, it has been announced that Rosebank is to be completely renovated and will reopen in the next year or so. Not only that, a brand new Falkirk distillery, imaginatively called the Falkirk Distillery, is in the process of being built at the other end of the town and will also be opening within a few months.

Bottle of whisky at Deanston Distillery, Doune

Now, although this news may not excite all sconeys please remember that both distilleries will undoubtedly feature a coffee shop. Excited now? Watch this space.

For the first time in its history, the BBC has resorted to public challenges to try and get the Prime Minister to be interviewed by Andrew Neil like all the other party leaders. No success so far but don’t be surprised if Neil’s home suddenly goes on fire with him in it.

FK16 6AG tel: 01786 843013 Coffee Bothy TA

///kneeled.blotches.fooling

Ordinary, Scones

The good ship Forth Belle

27 March 2018 billpaterson1@me.com

What?? Sometimes we go to extraordinary lengths in order to broaden the horizons of our sconey readers. That said, seldom do we have to risk life and limb quite like this. Nevertheless, undaunted, on a fine sunny day in March, we set sail from the Hawes Pier in South Queensferry into the uncharted waters of floating scones. We were aboard the good ship Forth Belle and the name of our trip was “The Blackness Castle, Three Bridges and … wait for it … Cream Tea Cruise”. Okay, now you understand!

The Prince of Wales

We were sailing up river under the old Forth Road Bridge, then the new Queensferry Crossing and before long we were passing the Rosyth Dockyard. Britain doesn’t have any planes to put on the aircraft carrier being built here but now that Putin has been forced to take on the mantle of bogey-man-in-chief we think the money will probably be found. Presumably after we’ve forked out the £300b for weapons of mass destruction like Trident of course. If Putin eventually gets put back in his box and there are to be no planes, the Prince of Wales will probably be put on Gumtree or eBay. Not him, the ship!

The restaurant on the Forth Belle cruise — Help yourself cream tea

For our cream tea we had to go below to the galley (hope you are heeding the nautical terminology) where there was a table from which we had to equip ourselves with the various accoutrements for a cream tea. Thankfully there was someone to serve us tea and coffee. Okay okay, we may have over dramatised the life and limb bit somewhat but there were other dangers. Because all the tables had been taken, we had to butter, jam and cream a scone on our knees with a plastic knife while the boat pitched and rolled mercilessly. Okay, that’s over dramatised as well! Maybe it was because of this high sense of adventure, maybe it was because of the chilling wind out here on the open water but our tea and scones tasted delicious.

Submarine U-21

Obviously there was no topscone award, there were certain shortcomings when it came to things like presentation. However, overall we thoroughly enjoyed what we had. Could easily have eaten another one. By this time we were at Blackness Castle which was as far up river as we would go before making the return journey. In a way we were mimicking German submarine U-21 which penetrated this far up the river in 1914 before turning back as well. They probably were not having a cream tea though!

Blackness Castle from the Forth Belle river cruiser — Blackness Castle , centre, looks like a battleship and may have scared off U-boat 21

Useful info

The crew of the good ship Forth Belle gave us all sorts of interesting snippets of information. Did you know, for instance, that the iconic Forth Rail Bridge weighs 100 tons more when it is raining. It also grows in length by 7 meters when it’s hot? No, we didn’t know either. However just think how many people you can bore at dinner parties with this sort of information. Alas, we didn’t see any seals or dolphins but there were plenty of cormorants, eider ducks and the like. The cruise was great fun, highly recommended. Our trip was the last of the day. It was the only one we could get because all the others were fully booked. What some people will do for a free cream tea!!

The Forth Road Bridges at sunset — Looking west from Hawes Pier

Kiwi scones

Our Kiwi correspondent kindly reported recently that even Ed Sheeran will do anything for a free scone. Apparently New Zealand‘s prime minister, Jacinda Ardern, couldn’t fit any of Ed’s eight NZ concerts into her busy schedule … so she invited him over to her place for a cuppa and a scone. He readily accepted because unbeknown to anyone up until then … he’s a fervent sconey! Why did the BBC not report this? It’s right up there with the usual stuff they like to report.

EH30 9TB tel: 0131 331 3030 Forth Boat Tours

Scones, history and a dollop of politics