Today we are at River House on the outskirts of Stirling. A lot has happened in the few days since our previous post from the Seagull Trust.
America’s reputation as the leader of the free world lies in tatters on the Oval Office floor. Oh dear, oh dear, the spectacle of Trump and his rottweiler pals trying to humiliate the defender of the Western world, was shocking and profoundly embarrassing for everyone unfortunate enough to have witnessed it. And then after a passage of Trump waxing lyrically about his many highly dubious attributes, came “Why do you not wear a suit?” Surely destined to go down in history as the most cretinous thing ever said to a world leader. It was, however, indicative of the hillbilly level of understanding in the room. It was left up to the good people of Vermont to restore some faith by letting JD Vance know he wasn’t welcome in their part of the world.
Now they want Zalensky to make a groveling apology for not sufficiently appreciating the US and the American people. Have they forgotten that unlike them, Zalensky has some semblance of intelligence and will doubtless grovel like a superhero?
At last, we made it
We feel confident the American people will eventually come to their senses and sort out this Muskesque Presidency. In the meantime, let’s get back to the serious business of scones. River House is a place we have been meaning to visit for years. We keep seeing the signs but never actually follow them. It is beautifully situated on the shores of a tiny loch with views of Stirling Castle.
It’s spacious and beautifully themed in the same style as other Cawley Group restaurants. It has a nice relaxed ambience. After a delicious light lunch, our nicely warmed scones were duly presented with a jar of jam and whipped cream in a little ladle thingy. Although not quite the consistency we normally go for they were very enjoyable nevertheless. Salutary to be able to sit in such comfortable surroundings several thousand miles away from the diabolical situation in Ukraine.
DANGER!
Guarantees?
Ukraine used to have the third biggest nuclear arsenal in the world until, in the 1994 Budapest Memorandum, it was persuaded to give it up completely in exchange for international guarantees that its borders would be respected. We don’t think they would have signed had they known that a bunch of muppets would be their guarantors in 2025.
Falkirk High Street is not what it used to be. Like many other High Streets, it has been hit hard by out-of-town and online shopping. On top of this, the High Street’s east end is currently being demolished to make way for a new town hall. Charity shops proliferate so it was no surprise to find that the premises previously occupied by Topshop had been taken over by the Seagull Trust Cruises Bookshop. What was a surprise, however, was that the bookshop had a cafe … and the cafe had scones!
Seagull Trust Cruises, a registered charity, with a dozen boats operating across Scotland providing canal cruises for the elderly and infirm. It’s run entirely by volunteers.
Two of the Seagull Trust boats on the Union canal
The Marion
A few years back Pat managed their residential boat … the Marion. It had seven berths so that wheelchair users with their carers could take it out for a week at a time. Unfortunately turning the boat around between cruises became a problem. Cleaning, changing beds and laundry just became too onerous. Reluctantly she had to give it up. Now the Marion only does day trips just like the other boats.
In common with most charities, they are forever trying to raise funds. Hence this bookshop selling second-hand books. We didn’t buy any but thought the least we could do was buy some coffee and scones. Two very chatty women behind the counter had us sorted out in no time. They even supplied us with some delicious homemade blackcurrant jam. The scones were segment-shaped. I asked if they had been made as a large round and then cut into segments. She said “No, when I make them they all tend to run together then I have to cut them like that.” Whatever she did they were really good. Not a topscone but pretty close.
Contrasts
The fact that these ladies volunteer to run this cafe on behalf of the Seagull Trust Cruises is a testament to the willingness of people to selflessly help those less fortunate. In contrast, this week we’ve found that the US and the UK, two countries that traditionally have been pretty much joined at the hip no longer seem to share the same interests or values. Here’s us thinking that Ukraine and Volodymyr Zelenskyy were making huge sacrifices trying to stop Putin’s advance across Europe and eventually America. How wrong could we be? Turns out that Ukraine is the aggressor and it’s all their fault! Who knew?
Sometimes, as they say in Northern Ireland, we take “a fit of the head staggers” and do things for no apparent reason. Today is one such day.
A day on the beach … pity about the gale force winds
A stormy night in Troon on the Ayrshire coast was to be our “no apparent reason”. However, we weren’t actually staying here at the Lochgreen House Hotel but along the road at Piersland House. Let us explain!
Piersland House, was built as a private residence in 1899 as the home of Sir Alexander Walker, grandson of Johnnie Walker, founder of the whisky company
Piersland House is a beautiful hotel with everything you could possibly want. Beautiful architecture, lavish furnishings, open log fires, every variety of Johnnie Walker whisky … what more could you wish for? A Troon scone, that’s what! Too much for Piersland, they had everything apart from scones! Mon dieu, how could we have chosen a place that can’t produce a scone? It beggars belief! The solution, of course, in our quest was to go a few hundred yards along the road to Lochgreen House where there was a great big welcome and scones a plenty.
Lochgreen House is owned by Bill Costley, a well known and celebrated figure in these parts. Owning several other local hotels he has, over the years, raised the hospitality levels in Ayrshire significantly. He has spent a lot of money making Lochgreen House the five-star venue it is today. Not so long ago, friends of ours took over the entire place for their wedding, so we were aware of Lochgreen House through them.
Hybrid
We were taken to a table by the window were we could look out over the garden which, unfortunately, was being battered to within an inch of its life by the storm. Inside, however, all was cool, calm and collected. It wasn’t long before our fruit scones arrived. They came warm and for some reason sliced in half. There was a jar of jam and some clotted cream topped with a variety of berries. All very nice except the scones were a bit odd. Not how we would normally expect a scone to be. Kind of like a hybrid cross between a scone and a muffin … a scoffin? Although enjoyable enough, unfortunately this version of a scone didn’t hit the mark for a topscone award.
The service and surroundings were excellent, however, Scones aside, Lochgreen House is fabulous and well worthy of a visit.
Ferries and trains
On our way back to Piersland House we took a little detour to Troon harbour where ferry services run to the Isle of Arran. We arrived just as the ferry was leaving.
CalMacs newest ferry, the Glen Sannox leaving Troon on its way to Arran. The Westminster government and the media are fond of lambasting the Scottish government on the £150 million overspend on the Glen Sannox whilst conveniently forgetting the £100 billion spend on the ill fated HS2 high speed rail with still nothing to show for it.
Celebrated?
The Ayrshire coast is a golfing hotspot, Troon is home to seven courses including Royal Troon, which regularly hosts the Open Championship. As we said earlier, for good reason, Bill Costley is a well known and celebrated figure in these parts. Donald Trump, who owns nearby Turnberry golf course is also well known though probably not so celebrated. His ownership has seen the course removed from the list of potential venues for the Open. If only that was the worst of his shortcomings.
Ayrshire is a fantastic part of Scotland which sadly we don’t pay enough attention to. Our internal compasses always tend to point north. Note to self … more Ayrshire scones!
We know this flies in the face of logic but today we are In Perth with some whisky we are taking to auction. “Why don’t you just drink it?” we hear you cry. Well, if it was ours, that’s exactly what would happen, but it’s not. We’re delivering it to Perth’s Whisky Auctioneer on behalf of a friend. To make things more exciting our satnav proudly announced “you have arrived at your destination” when we clearly hadn’t. We were still on the A9 Perth bypass but our destination was actually in the Inveralmond Industrial Estate. With the satnav switched off we entered what turned out to be a vast network of roads and industrial units. After several unsuccessful attempts, eventually we did actually reach our destination. Mission accomplished we headed for home but, lo and behold, before we had even left the estate we spotted the Compass Café. As you can see from the title photograph, the Compass Café is part of the Tiso Outdoor Experience.
Big news
On display, an eiderdown suit used by Dougal Haston on the 1972 attempt on Everest. The overboots belonged to Hamish MacInness
Tiso is a name that featured prominently in my youth. Every weekend involved hitch hiking to Glencoe so that me and my companions could do precarious things on vertical rock faces. It was amazing and the sense of freedom it gave us was unbelievable. Back then in the 60s we knew everyone in the glen as well as our weekender friends who would hitch hike up from Glasgow. You could bump into your mountaineering heroes like Hamish MacInness, Dougal Haston almost every day. However, while we had ambitions on some tricky local routes they had bigger fish to fry. Notably a direttissima on the north face of the Eiger in 1966 and, of course, Everest itself. On the 1972 assault on the SW ascent of Everest, Graham Tiso got trapped in a storm and spent four days alone, cut off from the rest of his party, Climbing was a tiny activity in those days but all these “risky” adventures were controversial and consequently became big news stories. The media couldn’t get enough of them.
Tiso original
Tiso’s original shop was in Edinburgh. It was tiny but back then there wasn’t that much available to buy. In his shop I spent what seemed like an absolute fortune on my boots (La Sportiva, Himalayas) and a Tiso designed rucksack that you could sleep in.
Just part of the Tiso shop. Amazing how much stuff you need to go outside these days
Most of our climbing gear was collected from rock faces where other, presumably more affluent climbers, either couldn’t be bothered or were unable to retrieve. Those were the days!
Unfortunately, many of our climbing heroes died pursuing their passion. Ironically, Haston died, aged 33, in a skiing accident but is still a legend in Scottish climbing circles.
For some reason this sign caught my attention
As you all know, I have little use for climbing gear nowadays. And that’s just as well because it appears I still can barely afford it. Some mountain bikes in the store cost £5000 and looked ferociously complicated. The Compass Café involved an ascent to the upper floor and was as much climbing as I could manage today.
Enthusiasm
The café is big and has a wide range of produce on offer. We were attended to by a wonderfully happy girl who was probably Polish. She said she only had five “cheese” and one “wild berry” scone left. Covered in icing, the wild berry one looked like a bit of an extravagant concoction. However, our girl told us with great delight that they were absolutely scrumptious. “when they come out of the oven in the morning … ooo, they are warm and “. her voice drifted off as she gave a little ecstatic wiggle. Seldom have we been sold a scone with such irrepressible passion.
When she brought it to our table she also brought two plates so we could share. We could tell she was genuinely excited for us to try her wild berry scone. She wasn’t wrong! Readers know how we like our scones … not too big with a crunchy exterior and a soft middle. Well this was the complete opposite but it was delicious. It was quite big and had loads of fruit which made it moist and unctuous. The icing covering made it sticky and messy to eat. The butter and jam were probably superfluous but we did use the jam. A fruit overload! Not a traditional topscone but definitely a top weird scone.
Things change
The climbing world has changed drastically since we were hanging out in Glencoe every weekend. The glen that we regarded as “our own” is now a huge tourist attraction due to its scenic beauty and, of course, the site of the famous Massacre of 1692. The National Trust for Scotland does its best to maintain the glen as near as possible to its original state in spite of the pressure from tourism.
Weird
To go with our “weird scone” award we should probably give another “weird” award for the Leader of the Free World. In his new role as spokesman for President Putin he has announced that the war is all Ukraine’s fault. Ukraine must be thinking “with friends like this who needs enemies?“
We are a little late with this post. You should have got it on Wednesday because that’s when we were last at the Lion and Unicorn Inn in the village of Thornhill near Stirling. But thereby hangs a tale … a sconological tale.
The lion is the national animal of England, and the unicorn is Scotland’s. It is a well known fact that a unicorn is a symbol of innocence and the only creature that can defeat a lion.
We had been here several weeks before and were delighted to note “scones” on the menu. When we asked for them, however, we were told they didn’t have any. Apparently, they were that rare breed, only available on Wednesdays and Thursdays. The next time we were here was when we posted from The Winnock when trying to find the MacGregor Monument. It was a Thursday, so thought we would try our luck. Still no scones but we did glean a little more information. They did a coffee morning “for the village” on Wednesday mornings. This was becoming a challenge!
So it was that on this Wednesday morning we thought we should phone ahead to check if the scones were only for “the village” or whether outsider riff riff such as ourselves could also partake. “Of course, no problem“, we were told.
Once there were eight pubs in the village but this is the only one left … a sign of the times. The Lion and Unicorn has been serving fine food, ales and presumably scones since 1635 … all we had to do was engage with one! We set off on the thirty minute drive to Thornhill with steely determination and a keen sense of anticipation. Would it be third time lucky?
Things I don’t know
A grandson of John Napier, inventor of logarithms, owned land here at one time. I mention this simply because I must have been off school the day they explained their importance. I never “got it”! In spite of years spent carrying a little book of sines, cosines and tangents around in my school bag, my entire career passed without the need for any of them. I’ve also discovered something else to further demonstrate the depth of my ignorance … Shetland cows. A farm at Thornhill breeds Shetland cows. Shetland ponies are famous but Shetland cows? Apparently, they are small, hardy and ideally suited to living in the special environment of Flanders Moss on the edge of the village. Anyway I could write a very hefty tome on things I don’t know so let’s return to more familiar territory … scones!
When we arrived we were shown to a table for two. We could easily see what they meant by a “coffee morning for the village“. From the babble of excited chatter emanating from a long table across from us it was pretty obvious what was going on. The large plate of scones was also a give away.Our host, the wonderful Fiona, remembered us. Presumably as the weird folk who were always asking about scones. We obviously made and impression! She asked if we would like to join the others at the long table. Initially we felt we would be intruding but suffice to say another couple of chairs were found and we were warmly welcomed. It was almost as if we were “villagers”! What a super friendly and interesting bunch of sconeys.
Coincidence
Unbelievably, one of the group, Janet, used to work alongside my late uncle in nearby Aberfoyle many years ago. She knew my cousins very well. Apart from ourselves, Janet was the only “outsider” there. To say that we thoroughly enjoyed meeting these people and joining their coffee morning would be a mighty understatement. They made our day! A hundred years ago a local newspaper wrote that Thornhill was “the pleasantest of pleasant villages“. We can vouch for that still being the case. The self-effacing Fiona had made the scones earlier that morning. When she discovered that her scones were to be “judged” she explained that the batteries on her scales had given up. She had had to guess at the quantities for the recipe.
She needn’t have worried, they were beautifully presented and easy topscones. Later, we discovered from our new found friends that her batteries had packed up months ago. Well done Fiona for making these delicious scones by pure force of habit and for being so welcoming. For us it was third time very lucky
Victorian photo of the Lion and Unicorn. Folks arriving for a village coffee morning?
As complete strangers it was heartwarming to be welcomed into what seems like a village tradition. When we returned home and saw Musk prancing around the Oval Office with his son Lil X on his shoulders it truly looked like the inmates had taken over the asylum. Take us back to the sanity of the Lion and Unicorn where the cares of the world were being discussed in a much more civilised fashion.
You have got to be careful when it comes to dealing with MacGregors. Their reputation as being complete scoundrels even led to King James VI proscribing the name “MacGregor”, the utterance of which was punishable by death. No messing! In spite of all that, however, we have many MacGregor friends and think that they’re actually quite nice. Today we are in the village of Drymen at The Winnock Hotel in the heart of MacGregor country but we didn’t set out to come here.
We actually set out to look for the mysterious MacGregor Monument. Why mysterious? Well, no one seems to be quite sure exactly who built it or why. It’s falling to bits due to neglect and, in spite of it being almost seventy feet tall, it’s nigh on impossible to find. A challenge!
Fine features
Once we had done battle with a rather rude woman who seemed to object to our presence on planet earth, climbed several fences and negotiated some thick undergrowth … voila! Its’ a big monument so you would think it would stick out like a sore thumb but no, it’s so enveloped in trees it only appears when you are just a few feet away. Quite magnificent in its own way but sadly neglected. Covered in moss with several of its finer features having fallen to the ground.
The MacGregor Monument. The bottom half is in the shape of an oak tree,, symbol of the MacGregor family who once owned the estate. In the photo above, devilish technology has been utilised to clear the trees so that it can be seen.
Outcasts
Mission accomplished and feeling rather pleased with ourselves we retraced our steps back to our car. It was a nice day so we decided to take the scenic route home, hence we ended up here at the Winnock Hotel. It’s an old coaching inn which has been catering to weary passersby for almost three hundred years. In the nice lounge area there were no free tables so we were ushered through to a bar area where we were entirely on our own. We felt a little bit like outcast MacGregors.
Back in the day, MacGregor men were hunted ruthlessly in what was essentially state sponsored genocide. Unfortunately, something we are not unfamiliar with today. Even today the Chief of the MacGregor Clan is known rather romantically as the Chieftain of the Children of the Mist. Maybe a reference to MacGregors having to hide out on higher ground.
Great value
Somewhat confusingly, at the Winnock we were told that if we ordered “a scone” we would get two. Rather than risk ending up with four scones we ordered some coffee and “a scone”. Sure enough the scone came with a partner and plenty of butter, jam and cream. They had been warmed which was nice but overall our experience here wasn’t great. Maybe we just got them on a bad day. The scones were nice enough but our experience as outcast MacGregors just didn’t do it for us. On the plus side, however, when we went to settle our bill it came to the grand total of £5. Great value for two coffees and two scones. WARNING: readers contemplating staying here should perhaps avoid rooms 38 and 39. They’re haunted by ghosts of the 16th century witch trails. Don’t say you weren’t told!
ps: Oddly enough it is MacGregors who are behind our favourite coffee company … Henry’s. Their Cat’s Pyjamas and Blow Your Socks Off brands are second to none. On our return to Falkirk we were invited to their Global HQ for coffee … and scones! Although some might think it a typical MacGregor wheeze and brazen attempt to gain a topscone award by the back door, how could we refuse? Like their coffee, the presentation, service and hospitality were second to none. We really appreciated seeing behind the scenes at Henry’s Coffee Company but, of course, they hadn’t baked the scones themselves and it wasn’t one that our readers could access. No topscone but a huge thank you!
Today we are more pleased than we ought to be about being here at the Castle View Restaurant in Menstrie. Why? For many years we have passed along the road at the foot of the Ochil hills and looked up at Broomhall Castle and wondered what it was all about. It never seemed to be anything that you could actually visit. But today we are visiting!The building has had a fairly colourful and chequered history.
Rumours don’t need facts
Built in 1874 it was originally called Broom Hall, a tribute to the blaze of yellow broom on the hillside that provides a backdrop in the Spring. As the private home of a wealthy mill owner its demise reflected the decline of the woollen industry.. By 1906 it had became an Italian Riding School and then a boys boarding school. In 1940 it went on fire. because the headmaster was German it was rumoured that the fire was set deliberately to act as a guide for the Luftwaffe bombing Clydebank. The fact that there was no bombing in Scotland at that time did not seem to affect the enthusiasm behind the rumours.
After the war the ruins were sold on to various owners who didn’t do anything with them. A delight for the local children who used it as a very scary playground. Following a spell as a nursing home, in 2003, approval was given for use as a hotel. Recently they’ve set up the Castle View Restaurant and that’s why we’re here.
Sam’s the man
He introduced himself and explained that the Castle View venture is very much his baby. For the duration of our visit Sam seemed to single handedly run the place, like a butterfly flitting round the tables talking to everyone at the same time. He was busy busy but amazingly he was successful, everyone was happy. A maestro of hospitality! Our scones were delicious and nicely presented with jam and a little bowl of cream. This was very near to a topscone but not quite. The place needs a bit more investment but maybe that will come in time.
Size matters
Some readers might think we are “picky” but the chandeliers were a little on the small side. In our opinion chandeliers should be the same size or bigger than the ceiling rose above them. Okay you all think we are “picky”! Suffice to say there is room for improvement with the decor.
one of the lounges
Unbelievable
But there is much more room for improvement elsewhere. Trump’s comments that the Reagan airport plane crash was caused by misfits in air traffic control was moronic even by his standards. To be even more outlandish he claimed to know this because he had “common sense”? Maybe we should send Sam over to help him with his interpersonal skills?
We’ve been to food@34a before. Many of you will be aware that from time to time we go to the Hippodrome cinema in Bo’ness. Although it’s the oldest cinema in Scotland that’s not what takes us there. Rather it’s its proximity to our garage. Whenever we have a problem we
The Hippodrome cinema
drop the car off and they take us to the cinema and pick us up when the film has finished and the car is fixed. It’s a great arrangement which has been going a few years now. Today’s film was “Went The Day Well” an old black and white film from 1942.
Problems
A picture at food@34a
We’d love to tell you how good it was. However, as we sat there with everyone else wondering why the movie was so late in starting a young lass appeared in front of the screen to inform us there was a technical problem. No showing today! Aargh! Our flabber was well and truly gasted! What to do now? The car wouldn’t be ready for at least a couple of hours
It was a nice day so we went for a walk round the old Bo’ness harbour. Bo’ness used to be called Barrowstouness but in the Great Letter Shortage of 1652 they were forced to shorten it. We’re pretty sure if Donald Trump came away with that sort of nonsense at least half of America would believe it. Anyway, these days the harbour is a mere shadow of its former self. Gone are the days when this was a great trading port. It even had its own Customs House. Eventually we headed back into town past the Steam Railway Museum. You may remember our post in 2019 from one of their steam trains when the Einsteinian like Theory of Sconativity was developed.
When we arrived at food@34a it was very busy and we were fortunate to get the last available table. By this time it was almost lunchtime but we decided on their small breakfast. Goodness knows what their big breakfast is like because the small one with bacon, egg, link suasage, square sausage, tattie scone, beans and two slices of toast was more than enough for us. After all that, did we need a scone? Definitely not, but we had one anyway, to share. They didn’t have cream but when it arrived the butter looked more like cream than butter. The service was great and without asking they brought two plates and two knives so that we could share. Unfortunately the scone was too big and although nice enough there was no way we could finish it.
The Donald has now been installed as the 47th President of the USA in a Disneyesque ceremony. His inaugural speech was notable for being completely devoid of anything approaching grace. He sees his task for the next four years as making the richest country in the world even richer and to hell with everyone else. The fact that inequality is at the root of most of the world’s and the US’s problems seems to have escaped him. If. on the other hand, by the time you receive this post he has resolved the problems of the Middle East and Ukraine, like he said he would, then we take it all back.
When we last posted from food@34a in 2023 our then PM, Rishi Sunak, had just appointed an ethics adviser to help him differentiate between right and wrong. Might be an idea for the new US administration?
Even though we didn’t see our movie “Well The Day Went” our day went well. The walk was really enjoyable and when we finished at food@34a the garage delivered us our car … fab!
We don’t understand why it’s been about five years since we last reported from the Lobster Pot in Blackness on Sea. It’s only a twenty minute drive and with its lighthearted approach to life and its cornucopia of artefacts. It’s always a joy to visit and it even has the village shop . We must do it more often?
There’s a sign on the way into the pub which boldly says “KEEP SCOTLAND WEIRD” and the interior decor of the place certainly does its best to maintain that ethos. There’s mermaids, figureheads, ropes and pulleys everywhere. It’s definitely weird but in a nice way. The walls and ceilings are covered in paintings and items, mostly with a nautical theme. If you have the time to look at everything you can discover a lot of the local history.
For a small village of less than one hundred inhabitants it definitely punches above its weight.
Blackness Castle, built in 1440 and known as “the ship that never sailed” because from the seaward side it looks like a huge battleship … it proved an effective deterrent to German U-Boats
The Duchess
As well the Lobster Pot it boasts an Outlander Castle, sandy beaches, a promenade, a pier, a sailing club and even a naturist swimming group.
The swimming group may have been started by the Duchess of Argyle judging by this picture!
Not only this but now the pub has set up a distillery next door … the Blackness Bay distillery. What more could you ask for? It’s tiny and hasn’t been going long enough to produce whisky but it does do an interesting range of Blackness Bay rums. When they do produce whisky in a couple of years it will be called “Mary Queen of Scotch”. It’s never going to compete with the Johnnie Walkers of this world but that’s not the point. It will be fun and maybe a bit weird. But while we’re waiting they have a new make spirit called “Virgin Mary”. And as if all that wasn’t enough they do scones as well!
After a walk along the beach we decided some lunch was required. I had a sandwich full of crab, prawns and lobster. When I say full, I mean FULL! Not easy to eat neatly. It came with a salad and a tin cup full of delicious chips. They didn’t have cream so the scone, when it arrived, just had butter and jam and unfortunately none of it was local. The scone wasn’t easy to eat neatly either. Because it was quite warm the butter melted and then the scone tended to fall apart. Nowhere near a topscone but it didn’t detract from a really enjoyable visit.
Futility of life
The pub has held a poetry competition. According to the website “The older locals gather with the landlord to quietly contemplate the futility of human existence without as much as a poem to tell future generations of the glory that once was Blackness on Sea“. The rules stated that it had to mention the pub and the village though not necessarily in complimentary terms. A £1000 prize for the winning entry meant there were 270 entries. The winning submission by Arran Potts was called “Come Away In“.
The local folk enjoying themselves in front of the Lobster Pot
Sage advice
With the Donald getting his feet under the desk in the Oval Office again on Monday this sign seemed like apt advice for the rest of the world.
And another sign in the garden of the Lobster Pot.
ps; last time we were here we asked for the meaning behind this diorama. So far no one was brave enough to offer one.
It contains a fisherman pointing at a cooked lobster on top of a creel, five bottles of Guinness, a terrier dog wearing wellington boots and a large snake wound around a naked lady.
If there is some deep meaning in this allegory then hopefully some reader might decipher it? No prize but huge kudos.
We all know people who could start a fight in an empty room, don’t we? But do you know folk who could do that over a scone at the Smiddy Farm Shop? But more of that later.
We come here quite a lot because we pass it on our way to other places. It’s strategically located at a fork in the road. Blair Drummond Estate runs the Smiddy and a lot of the produce comes from its own farms.
Life and limb
Attentive readers will, of course, remember that a couple of years back we also reported from here on banana and chocolate scones. On that ocassion we were just doing some shopping – Pat likes the milk that comes from the the Wee Isle Dairy on the Isle of Gigha. At the checkout we noticed packets of banana and chocolate scones. In the interests of the further education of our readers we, of course, risked life and limb and tried them out at home. The verdict was surprisingly quite favourable.
Extra super attentive readers will remember our initial visit to this café back in October 2016. It had opened its doors for the first time just 75 minutes before we arrived. Unsurprisingly there were some teething problems but we could see huge potential. The scones on that occasion were nice with lots of fruit but there was no cream and we judged them to be just a bit too big.
Our visit today proved that the potential had indeed been realised. It was very busy and we were fortunate to get the last available table. The scone display cabinet, however, was bereft of scones … just a few sad crumbs. When we asked they simply told us that if there were none in the cabinet they had all gone. Disheartened, we looked at the menu to see if any thing else tickled our fancy. Lo and behold, on the menu they had “afternoon treat with mini scones“. When we asked if we could just have the mini scones our server steadfastly informed us “you only get them with the afternoon treat!!”
Now we weren’t exactly spoiling for a fight but we did question the logic. If they had mini scones surely we could have them! Especially since they’d run out of proper scones? Eventually she relented and said she would go and ask. Happily the response was “no problem!” We ordered two mini fruit scones with jam and cream and some of our favourite Henry’s coffee.
Awkward customers
We were happy when they arrived because they were just ever so slightly smaller than how we like them … success! No cream, however, so we had to remind her. There was only a couple of bites in each scone so there was no point in starting without it. Five minutes later and still without cream we had go and find her. She had forgotten again! She scurried off to get some, no doubt muttering under her breath “what is it with these mad scone people?“. Eventually everything was assembled. The scones were really nice but with all things considered there wasn’t to be a topscone today. To be fair, our server was very busy and in the circumstances handled us awkward customers extremely well … no blows were exchanged.
The 47th
Donald Trump still has a week to go before being sworn in as the 47th President of the USA. However, trouble is brewing already. Amongst his stated ambitions is to take over Greenland … by force if necessary! Greenland is resource rich and strategically placed on Russia’s main shipping route to the Atlantic. Scotland is also resource rich and strategically placed on Russia’s main shipping route to the Atlantic. Will we be next? He can maybe take Greenland but he’ll be in for a shock if he tries it on with Scotland! We’re permanently angry and we’ve got claymores!
After a delicious light lunch, our nicely warmed scones were duly presented with a jar of jam and whipped cream in a little ladle thingy. Although not quite the consistency we normally go for they were very enjoyable nevertheless. Salutary to be able to sit in such comfortable surroundings several thousand miles away from the diabolical situation in Ukraine.
