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These are the best scones we have found so far.

Scones, Top

Kelvin Pocket Café

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We are in Glasgow for the AUOB (All Under One Banner) March for Independence. We’re not born protesters but let’s face it we’ve got to do something so that Scotland can stop having its decisions made by another country. Being torn out of the EU against our will is bad enough but now that Theresa May has said that she will refuse permission for another referendum in Scotland, there is fresh impetus for this march.

Storm troopers

The Edinburgh march last year which over 100,000 people attended was our first. It was such good fun we thought we should do it again. This three mile Glasgow march was from Kelvingrove Park to Glasgow Green … far enough for our wee legs. It was also the 4th May and National Star Wars Day. We should have guessed that we might be in for a crazy day when the electronic signs at Falkirk High station were displaying “May the Fourth be with you, all light sabres and tickets must be ready for inspection”. Later we would find ourselves marching alongside a kilted storm-trooper.Internal view of the Kelvin Pocket Café, Glasgow

Brie and Thyme

Anyway, we met up with our friends (fellow marchers) and got the subway to Kelvingrove station where we could join up with the multitudes. We had half an hour to spare, however, and it just so happened that right outside the station there was the Kelvin Pocket Café … an unexpected scone opportunity perhaps ?

Haggis and cracked pepper crisps
Even the crisps had gone all Scottish

We thought it got its name from the fact that it’s pretty small, but no. Apparently it relates to the fact that their outside seating area is a little sheltered suntrap in the afternoon. Today, all these seats were taken but we managed to get the last table inside … and yes, they had scones. A cheese scone at the Kelvin Pocket Café, Glasgow

Unfortunately there were only cheese scones left so it was Hobson’s choice. These scones weren’t just any old cheese scones though. They were Brie and Thyme scones and they were delicious. Supplied just with butter they had a lovely crunchy texture and the flavour was subtle but wonderful. This is the first cheese scone to acquire our highest accolade … well done the Kelvin Pocket. The coffee was also great … they get it from Climpson & Sons in London and the beans are available to buy at the counter. Service was friendly and everything was prepared on site. There wasn’t anything not to like about this place. A great start to our day.

The Time Is NoAUOB March, Glasgow, May 2019w

All too soon, however, our scones were but a memory and we had to head out to join the throng. A flotilla of wheelchairs and a pipe band, specially formed for the event, were in the lead. In spite of causing major disruption throughout the city the atmosphere was one of celebration. Even the people being held up were cheering us on. All sorts of people, all sorts of nationalities, all sorts of ages, all happily walking together. It had a carnival feel. The police were even joining in as people waved from tenement windows, buses and cars all along the route. Restaurants were emptying as staff and patrons came out on to the pavements to lend their support.

AUOB March, Glasgow, May 2019
Front page of the Sunday National

The weather, though threatening to rain on several occasions, was kind to us. We got to our destination in reasonable shape. Estimates are that it was as big as the 100,000 Edinburgh march and we have no reason to doubt that. We had something to eat, listened to the music and the speechs and as we were leaving to go home marchers were still just arriving at Glasgow Green.

Terracota Fountain at Glasgow Green
The Doulton terracotta fountain at Glasgow Green with the Templeton Building in the form of  the Doge’s Palace in Venice in the distance
Another fine mess

Westminster has just embroiled itself in yet another mess with Secretary of State for Defence Gavin Williamson or to be perfectly accurate, ex Secretary of State for Defence. Incredibly, in spite of the Tories losing over 1300 councillors in the recent local elections and all the gains going to Remain parties it is being interpreted by May as a mandate “to get on and leave”.

AUOB March, Glasgow, May 2019
Flags on railings at Glasgow Green

Today it was heartening to be in the presence of so many who were all literally singing from the same hymn sheet. It’s time for Scotland to flourish, hold its head up and go its own way. After Brexit we have Scexit.

G4 9HG              tel: 07793 315700                Kelvin Pocket TA

///rests.move.jungle

ps: The Pedant has been busy in Cheltenham. He found one K6 being used as a cash dispenser and another group of 6 K6s all made at the Lion Foundry in Kirkintilloch but none working.K6 telephone boxes in Cheltenham

What do you call a group of six telephone boxes? Maybe ‘a call’? Other suggestions welcome. If you are really keen you can find the one on the left at

///remind.zone.plank

Scones, Top

IV10 Fortrose

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Today we are in Fortrose on the Black Isle just north of Inverness. We are here to see dolphins with a host of expectant mini people. Having had no luck with Nessie we are desperately trying to find dolphins instead. And Chanonry Point in Fortrose is definitely the place to see them. Except there weren’t any there … arrgghh!

Looking for dolphins at Chanonry Point, Fortrose
Mini person looking for dolphins

You start to question your own self worth when faced with lots of mini people full of unfulfilled expectation. Thank goodness a late burst of reality came to our rescue in the form of the Easter Bunny.

Looking through holes

Sign for IV10 in FortroseOne chap who could have foreseen all this disappointment was Kenneth Mackenzie, the Brahan Seer, Scotland’s Nostradamus. He made many predictions in the 16th century, most of which actually came true. He had a pebble with a hole through which he could see the future. Such pebbles can still be found on the beach at Rosemarkie, the next village to Fortrose. We were sorely tempted to send some down to Theresa May. If she looked through the hole she would be able to see the fruits of her labours … an independent Scotland, a united Ireland and England slowly being sucked into a black hole.

Plaque to the Brahan Seer at Chanonry Point, Fortrose
Memorial stone to the Brahan Seer on Chanonry Point.

Having the ‘second sight‘ can be a bit of a curse though.  When Lady Seaforth, wife of the Earl of Seaforth and reputedly the ugliest woman in Scotland, asked Mackenzie if he could see her husband on his visit to Paris. He said he could, he was fine but refused to elaborate. When she threatened to have him killed unless he told her everything he eventually admitted that the Earl was having a high old time of it in the French capital with several other women. He also predicted the downfall of the House of Seaforth.

These predictions were completely true, however, they were so scandalous she had him dipped head first into a barrel of boiling oil, here on Chanonry Point. Surely, he should have seen that coming! Ironically, as he met his horrific and untimely end, he was probably  comforted by the sight of leaping dolphins just offshore! Okay, maybe not that comforted!Internal view of IV10 in Fortrose

Mission accomplished

Anyway after a few hours of stone skimming and non-existent dolphin watching some sort of sustenance was called for. We ended up here at IV10 (it’s the postcode) on the town’s high street. It was one of these places where you just new as soon as you walked in that it was going to be good. Although descending on them en masse (six adults and five mini people) they were not put out at all. A lady who was half Argentinian, half Greek had us all sorted out in no time and seemed absolutely delighted to be doing it. We had a lunch of fantastic food, couldn’t have been better.

The scone that Pat and I were sharing was also first class. Nicely presented with generous helping of jam and cream … no prepacked stuff here. We like everything about this place, from the excellent deli to the beautiful al fresco eating area. They say that they “aim to offer responsibly sourced, uncomplicated food and drink, made with love and respect“. Mission accomplished IV10, we need more, go-to destinations, like this in the Highlands.

Internal view of IV10 in Fortrose

Unbelievably big holes

We think Kenneth Mackenzie wouldn’t have had too much trouble predicting new and dismal shootings in N.Ireland or even bomb blasts in Sri Lanka. However he might have found it harder to foresee 1000 people being arrested in London for trying to save the planet … or a comedian being elected President of Ukraine. You couldn’t make it up … you really need a great muckle hole in your stone for that sort of thing!

The Chanonry Point lighthouse at Chanonry Point, Fortrose
Chanonry Point lighthouse

IV10 8SX.      tel: 01381 620690         IV10 Café

///youthful.whiplash.green

Scones, Top

Forest Hills Revisited

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The last time we were at Forest Hills was back in August 2016. Britain was still reeling from the result of the Brexit referendum, David Cameron had vanished into thin air and the Tories were desperately trying to save their party. Not a lot has changed. Back then, however, we had the media and the politician’s favourite distraction … the Olympics. The masses enter a kind of stupefied state where nothing else really matters. While we were at Forest Hills, Team GB had famously beaten Team Vanuatu in the hop,skip and jump event. As we leave the EU this Friday we need another momentous moment like that to distract us from impending disaster. It’s not really a disaster, life will go on, it’s just that we rather like being European. Infinitely preferable to being British with our arcane systems of government.

Ah well, even if we could arrange an Olympics or even a Commonwealth Games before Friday we would have to let everyone beat us … at everything! Otherwise they might not trade with us! And, after we leave Europe, we might be dependent on Vanuatu for goodness sake!

Correspondents

Anyway, you are all very familiar with our international network of correspondents by now. They expand our sconological research to parts that we simply cannot reach.  Sometimes the odd telephone box creeps in as well. Our Trossachs correspondents, of course, are amongst the most adventurous. They could pop up in Gibraltar or Lithuania or Basseterre or Argentina or even 38,000 feet up in the air … there is simply no telling. Today, however, they are back in their natural habitat. They have invited us to help celebrate their wedding anniversary in Kinlochard. We were staying in the hotel but the celebrations were being held in the village hall. While we were waiting for the festivities to begin we thought we should check that scone standards had not slipped since our previous review. Internal view of the Forest Hills Hotel, Kinlochard

Scones at the Forest Hills Hotel, KinlochardWe were relatively early so had the whole lounge to ourselves. Sitting in front of a wonderful log fire our beautifully warmed scones were presented with lots of jam and a generous pot of whipped cream complete with strawberry. What’s not to like? The tea and coffee were all excellent and the scones were just the right size with that lovely crunchy outer and fabulous soft inner. Delighted to report that Forest Hills has indeed retained its topscone award … well done! Of course, we would expect no less from a ‘MacDonald’ Hotel.

Gluten free?

Later, along with about fifty other revellers we had a fabulous evening of eating and drinking with music supplied by the excellent Chapter Four folk band. When it came to the ceilidh, suffice to say that many willows were stripped with all the usual sophisticated aplomb accorded to that particular dance. Scones at the Kinlochard Village HallBack at the hotel, we retired to bed, happy but exhausted. Next day, however, saw us at the village hall again. This time it was to partake of scones …. gluten free scones, another first for us. Oh, dear, two scones in as many days! They had been made specially by a local lady who has a gluten free diet. Delicious but, of course, we couldn’t make an award … there’s no way for readers to access them.

Great way to round off the weekend’s celebrations though and for everyone to say their farewells. Congratulations and huge thanks to our super generous hosts. When they come down off cloud nine we hope they remember to get back to their sconey day jobs.

Farewell to Europe

‘Farewell to Europe’ (should be a lament for the bagpipes) is probably not going to happen on Friday. At least we don’t think it will actually happen on that day … who knows, nobody knows, it might, it might not? It’s like the UK has decided to commit suicide but can’t make up its mind how to do it! It wouldn’t be so bad if it just hurt us but it could also wreck the Irish economy and potentially start ‘the troubles’ all over again. That’s bad! Hopefully, what with all the delays, they will eventually realise that suicide isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

FK8 3TL    tel: 0344 879 9057      MacDonald Forest Hills Hotel & Spa

///taxpayers.globe.woof

ps: We are always keen to promote new correspondents and were delighted to receive this report from our rookie ‘wildlife correspondents’. They venture into all sorts of out of the way places in pursuit of flora and fauna. Hence they found themselves in the Balmoral Hotel in Edinburgh having afternoon tea when their fledgling sconological urges kicked in and drove them to file their first report. Scones at the Balmoral Hotel, Edinburgh

Although they did not feel sufficiently qualified to formally award a topscone they, nevertheless, could not imagine a scone being any ‘topper’. A very promising start, our rookies showing definite potential. Many thanks L&R. We will, of course, endeavour to deliver an official verdict. That is once we have saved up enough to enter the Balmoral’s hallowed halls.

K 6 telephone box in Oxfordpps: The Pedant has just filed a report on this somewhat delapidated  Lion Foundry K6 in Oxford. It goes under the What3 Words code of ///loved.lonely.vivid which rather belies its appearance and its location in the centre of the city. He didn’t say if it was operational but it looks like it may have been used to relay instructions to the Oxford team in the boat race last Sunday.

island, Scones, Top

Artizan Café

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Doubtless you will all heave a huge sigh of relief when we say that our trip to the Outer Isles has finally come to an end. To get back home, however, we had to drive back through the hills of Harris and across the moors of Lewis to get to Stornoway. There we could catch a ferry to Ullapool on the the Scottish mainland.

View of Stornoway harbour
Stornoway harbour

We aimed to leave a little time, however, so that we could see if there was more to Stornoway than black pudding. As you are all very well aware this town is the home of this delicacy. That mixture of beefsuet, oatmeal, blood, onion, salt and pepper that’s become a favourite of fine dining establishments throughout the world. It’s good for you because it’s high in protein, zinc and iron. A Stornoway black puddingNow, it’s very future is endangered by Brexit. You probably have not been aware of Westminster debating the future of black pudding … because it hasn’t. Stornoway Black Pudding is a PGI (Protected Geographical Indication) under the EU Protected Food Name Scheme. Once we leave the EU that protection has gone. Any old Tom, Dick or Harry in Manchester, or wherever, will be able to produce inferior black pudding and call it ‘Stornoway’. If ever there was a reason for cancelling Brexit, this is it.

We went to Macleod & Macleod’s shop to view the genuine articles in their native surroundings, We didn’t buy. Pat’s not a fan so I would have had to eat all 1.5 kg myself. Too much even for me. Across the street from Macleod & Macleod is Artizan, a rather nice café combined with art gallery and jewellery shop.

Technological scone location

At this point perhaps we should explain an addition to the info at the end of each post. Traditionally we have provided post code, phone number and web address. However, our correspondent, the Pedant, has complained that this only gives a vague idea of scone location … a matter of concern to him … him being a pedant and all that. An app called What3Words provides much more accurate information and will locate a scone, or at least the table it was on with a unique combination of three words. The three at the end of this post ‘calculating.sweetened.blossom’ will not only take you to the Artizan café but to the table we were sitting at in the café … provided you have the app, of course. No other table on earth has these same three words. Either a wonder of modern technology or a complete waste of time … it’s up to you. It is remarkable though and it’s free so give it a whirl if you want to know exactly where our scones are.

A scone at Artisan in StornowayAnyway Artizan was one of these places which just gives off a good vibe as soon as you go in. Everything about it feels good. When our scone came it was complete with butter, jam and clotted cream. It was delicious. Just the right amount of crunchiness combined with an excellent fluffy soft centre. No problem awarding a topscone here. At last our long run of ordinary scones had been broken. The lovely lady who actually baked them chatted to us while she cleared our table. She was great as well!

All good things ..

It saves a lot of time and money.Now How Kamagra 100mg Works: Kamagra cialis overnight shipping basically gets the obstructed blood flowing through the veins to the male reproductive System, also referred to as “impotence” or “erectile dysfunction”, Sexual Impotency or Erectile Dysfunction which could have resulted due to Pelvic/Perineal injuries, Hypertension, Diabetes Mellitus and Prostrate/Urethra injuries etc. tadalafil uk Keep away from reach of children. Its leading brands are Forever New, Classic Polo, Inkfruit, Lee, Nike, Probase, Puma, Adidas, Reebok, Ed Hardy, cialis 20 mg Decathlon, Lotto, Ediots, Tantra, Guerilla and Mr. This effervescent formula is quickly absorbed into the bloodstream to suppress cialis 20mg price the function of an enzyme in the body known as PDE-5. And so we have come to the end of our trip. It has been great. A bit windy perhaps but we didn’t get rained on once. We have been able to provide our readers with a much more accurate scone locating system and discovered the home of black pudding, best reason, if ever there was one, for cancelling Brexit all together. As Theresa May contemplates dragging her battered and bruised ‘Deal’ back to the Commons for an unbelievable 4th time, someone really needs to take her aside and speak to her about black pudding.

View of Stornoway harbour
sad farewell to Stornoway and the Outer Hebrides

HS1 2DH             tel: 01851 706538        Artizan

W3W – calculating sweetened blossom

Red pepper, spring onion and rosemary sconesps: the Pedant has also sent this picture of red pepper, spring onion and rosemary scones. He came across them on a baking website. He felt that this was a step too far. What do you think? Strawberry or blackcurrant jam? Cream?

pps: If you have downloaded the W3W app and look at ‘rake.tacky.fronds’ that’s where we are on a ferry in the middle of the Minch … see, no post codes out here! When we reach ‘reap.scored.twitchy’ we’ll be home!

english, Scones, Top, weird

Café Royal

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The name ‘Café Royal‘ is synonymous with opulence and conjures up images of over-the-top Victorian decadence. Just the sort of place for us you might think. The epicentre of London fashion and the world’s finest wine cellar. Again, just the sort of place for us. It was the place to be seen by the likes of Noël Coward, Brigitte Bardot and Oscar Wilde. Once again, just the sort of place for us. Except this Café Royal is not in London, it’s in Newcastle-upon-Tyne.

Normally Newcastle is but a momentary pause as we make our way south on the London train. On this occasion, however, it was our destination, or rather a transit stop on our way to Amsterdam. This post and the previous post on the Winkel are not in correct chronological order. Why? Just because!

Posh tea

We had an hour or so to kill and decided, since it was almost scone o’clock, that we should explore the city a little in the hope of finding one. We wandered up towards, what looks like Nelson’s column, but is in fact the Grey’s monument. It commemorates the passing of the Great Reform Act of 1832 by Prime Minister of the time, Earl Grey. Of course. we all know that the real reason for the monument is because the very same Earl Grey invented posh tea. Run of the mill Reform Acts can’t hold a candle to posh tea after all.

To our surprise we found this part of the city very nice indeed. It was bustling with people going about their business, it sported lots of fine architecture and had a nice cosmopolitan feel to it.  “It’s a canny toon” as the local Geordies would say! Perhaps we shouldn’t have been surprised but we were … pleasantly!

Internal view of the Café Royal in Newcastle upon TyneThis Café Royal is close by the monument so we thought we would give it a try. However, any grandiose ideas of lush opulence were dashed on the jagged rocks of expectation as soon as we entered. This place is modern but not unpleasantly so. Nice, but not in the way we had anticipated. It’s owned by the Sir John Fitzgerald group, a family run business established in the 1850s and still going strong. It owns lots of pubs and restaurants in the area.

The system

Scones at the Café Royal in Newcastle upon Tyne

One should make sure that they should get over stress very soon as it might make more helpful tabs vardenafil 20mg tab you suffer so many problems. With the introduction of many erectile dysfunction remedy medicine within the final decade, the vast majority of folks affected by this problem have almost obtained a new lease of commander levitra Read Full Article life. Though medical science has not come about until result of this drug does not get hardness enough for becoming erect. online cialis sale best buy cialis appalachianmagazine.com It is probably fairly obvious but everything you do requires energy. They have a system. You have to find a table, note its number then go to the counter and place your order. Once you have paid you return to your table and in due course your order is brought to you. Is that self service? We’re not sure but it worked! They had cheese and chive or raspberry scones so we went for raspberry. Scones at the Café Royal in Newcastle upon TyneHadn’t had one of those since we reviewed the infamous Bob & Bert’s raspberry ripple scone a few months back. It didn’t fare too well so how would this one do? Very well as it turned out. It came with plenty jam and clotted cream and was very light and fluffy. We enjoyed the scone and the place so decided to award it a top weird scone. Well done Café Royal!Internal view of the Café Royal in Newcastle upon Tyne

What’s in a vote?

Earl Grey’s Great Reform Act of 1832 was in  response to widespread criticism of the electoral system. MPs, in some areas, could be elected on just a handful of votes. It laid the foundations for male suffrage even though that would take many more years to become a reality.

Scuplture near the Café Royal in Newcastle upon Tyne
Man with Potential Selves by Sean Henry

Nowadays all men and women have the vote, however, in GB, some votes are worth much more than others. Great Britain is formed of two countries yet voting in Scotland is pointless. If no one voted at all it would make no difference whatsoever. For example, if every Scottish MP was of one voice on a subject of interest to Scotland, it would be overturned at Westminster even if 483 English MPs didn’t even bother to get out of bed. Scotland, from that point of view, is disenfranchised. We have a government we didn’t vote for and now we are being taken out of the EU against Scotland’s wishes and interests.

In 1644 Newcastle was occupied by a Scottish army where they held Charles I prisoner. Perhaps it is time for something similar?

NE1 5AW      tel: 0191 231 3000         Café Royal

Scones, Top

Scotts at South Queensferry

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Just when it seems that our government is hell bent on making everyone unhappy we find a place that specialising in doing exactly the opposite. Perhaps we should explain.

Port Edgar gets the Edgar bit from Edgar Aetheling, the brother of Queen Margaret from whom Queensferry get its name. In my mind, however, it is always associated with my powerboat license. It’s where I got it.

View of Forth Bridges from Scotts at Port Edgar
Road and rail bridges from the terrace at Scotts

Lots of ‘man overboard’  and James Bond type manoeuvres conducted under the two Forth Bridges. At that time the Queensferry Crossing wasn’t even a gleam in the eye of the Scottish Government. That gives you an idea of how long ago it was.

View of Queensferry Crossing from Scotts at Port Edgar
Queensferry Crossing from the terrace at Scotts
First impressions

The last time we were here it was at the Canadian/Scottish themed Down The Hatch, all maple leaves and Saltires. This place, Scotts at South Queensferry, was yet to open. They add ‘South Queensferry’ because no one, except yachties and powerboaters, has ever heard of Port Edgar. Eight years ago Buzzworks Holdings started out in Largs marina with their first restaurant. This is now their eleventh and most recent.

Internal view of Scotts at Port Edgar
Part of the ‘bookable’ restaurant area
Mission statements

Approaching from the car park it doesn’t look too promising. Once inside, however, the somewhat austere industrial exterior gives way to a wonderful warm and beautifully decorated interior. All centered round a large horshoe bar. It’s really busy. Outside there was not a soul to be seen. In here there are tons of folk all eating drinking and generally enjoying themselves. The sound of multiple conversations, the clink of glasses and the buzz of staff quietly going about their business.

Their stated mission is “to make people happy”. Well we would see about that, wouldn’t we! We’re also on a mission and, at the end of the day, it would all depend on the scones whether this duo were happy or not.Internal view of Scotts at Port Edgar

Kiwis

The person looking after us was Kasey, a kiwi, spending some time working in Scotland. She had already spent five months working in Elliots in Prestwick but while it was undergoing a £1m refurbishment the company had arranged for her to work here. Hotel and travelling expenses all taken care of. They obviously know how to retain their good staff because Kasey was a delight. When we asked how long she was planning to stay in Scotland she said “until my visa runs out at the end on 2020”. Welcome Kasey, great to have you here.Internal view of Scotts at Port Edgar
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Unbookable

We had noticed the scones on the way in, They looked quite big. As we ordered lunch we asked for a scone to share with our tea. Kasey told us. “All scones come with butter, jam and cream but would you like the scone just as it is, gently warmed or toasted?” A scone at Scotts at Port EdgarNever been asked that before! Fab, toasted it was. As we waited for our scone to arrive we could see that all the staff, even though they were very busy, took time to chat and have a laugh with the customers. This is how customer care should be! Scotts even has an area for people who book and another which is unbookable. It’s for people like us who just turn up out of the blue. Genius!

Fish at Scotts at Port Edgar
Scotts’ aquarium

After our lunch our toasted scone duly arrived. Nicely presented, wonderfully warm and with plenty of everything to go with it. Delicious, we were delighted to award a topscone. You might think it was expensive however we had a delicious lunch, tea, coffee and a topscone for under £25, not too bad at all.

Internal view of Scotts at Port Edgar
part of the bar area

If indeed their mission is to make people happy then it certainly worked for us. We were happy, happy, happy. Not something we could say about the current political outlook. As Theresa May goes off to Brussels to flog the horse that died months ago you do feel for the horse. It must be thinking “I’m dead for goodness sake, stop the flogging!” There’s a wonderful irony in Northern Ireland being the obstacle to progress on Brexit what with Northern Ireland being a purely Westminster construct.

Happy again?

At least Corbyn, who has led from the back throughout Brexit, has decided to talk again. Presumably because no one was talking to him … hurragh! Maybe they can just forget the whole Brexit thing and, like Scotts, make people happy again. Even the most ardent Brexiteers might be happy to see some return to normality. Perhaps Buzzworks Holdings should be put in charge of the whole thing.

Internal view of Scotts at Port Edgar
part of he non-bookable area
Nothing changes

Today is the 100th anniversary of the Battle of George Square in Glasgow. In 1919 about 25,000 striking workers, who had petitioned for a 40 hour working week, gathered in the Square awaiting the result. Westminster sent troops and tanks to quell what they perceived as the beginning of a Bolshevik style revolution. No Scottish troops were involved for fear they might side with the strikers. There was huge fear that access to Scotland’s resources might be lost. Gosh, one hundred years on and nothing’s changed!Internal view of Scotts at Port EdgarMany thanks to Scotts and our new kiwi friend for a very enjoyable visit. Consider your mission accomplished.

EH30 9SQ                  tel: 0131 370 8166               Scotts

Scones, Top

Peacock Alley

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Hello, hello, the UK here! Is there anybody out there? Has the US gone to war with N. Korea, or Iran, or Mexico? Is there any wall building going on? What about the gilet jaune? We ask because recently we have had no news whatsoever. Wall to wall coverage of journalists asking experts Brexit questions to which they don’t know the answers. The journalists know the experts don’t know the answers but they ask anyway … over and over and over. When they get bored of experts they go and ask the man in the street for answers … aaarggghhh! Such is the state of UK media and politics.

The logo for Peacock Alley at Waldorf Astoria, EdinburghAfter the most disastrous week ever in the history of British politics, she with no shame, has promised to listen to others. Woopeedoo! Now, rather than take this wondrous opportunity, Corbyn has gone in the huff, refusing to talk. Over the past year he has been half savaged to death by principles jumping up and biting him but he hasn’t recognised any of them. Now he has suddenly discovered one … ‘no talks without a guarantee of No Hard Brexit’! Absolutely brilliant Jeremy. Considering most of your backers voted for exactly the opposite, absolutely brilliant! No wonder the EU is scratching its twenty seven heads.

Interior view of Peacock Alley at Waldorf Astoria, EdinburghHow to spend money

Let us take you away from all that for just a moment. Today we are on a mission to spend some money.  Eh? More difficult than you might imagine. We decided to take a trip into Edinburgh and go see ‘Colette’ at the cinema. The concessionary rail ticket didn’t cost much. The Cameo Picturehouse didn’t cost anything … we’re members. Afterwards we took a bus into the town centre and it didn’t cost anything either. How do you spend money in Scotland? Okay, you’ve guessed … scones. So far we have not discovered anywhere that does free scones, or even concessionary scones but rest assured, when we do, you will be the first to know.

By the way Colette, starring Keira Knightley was enjoyable enough. Beautifully photographed and well acted but, for us, it just never quite got going.

Interior view of Peacock Alley at Waldorf Astoria, Edinburgh

Strutting

Anyway the bus dropped us off right outside the Waldorf Astoria. It was the bus that did it … honest! On previous visits we have gone to the Pompadour restaurant but at this time of day it had to be Peacock Alley. It is situated in what used to be the forecourt of the old Princes Street Station.  Peacock Alley gets its name from the original Waldorf Astoria which opened in 1897 where the Empire State Building stands today. It had a corridor where the rich and powerful could strut their stuff. When we arrived there were already several other rich and powerful people there. Things got decidedly awkward for a while as we all flaunted our rival plumage. Eventually things simmered down and we were able to take our seats and order some lunch … and a cream tea.

The station clock at Peacock Alley at Waldorf Astoria, Edinburgh
The old station clock which was always 5 minutes fast and still is.

Paul, who was looking after us and had obviously been impressed by our performance, asked us to go easy on him since he had only been in the job a few days. He was still learning. No problem, all our angst was directed towards the vast tea menu. Eventually Pat opted for Blue Lady. A blend of mallow and marigold flowers and flavoured with grapefruit. I’m not allowed grapefruit so it was the Peacock Alley blend for me. Apparently it’s inspired by the history of the railway station. Lapsang souchong, roasted oolong combined with specially selected Scottish whisky. Normally we just laugh at these descriptions but the Peacock Alley blend did taste a bit smokey with just a hint of train driver’s overalls.

The scones come two by two

We had some lunch and were ready for our cream teas. Unexpectedly, the scones in a cream tea come as a warm brace. Help, would we manage both? Initially we thought “no way” however they were so gooA scone at Peacock Alley at Waldorf Astoria, Edinburghd we eventually polished off the lot. The warm scones together with pineapple and passion fruit jam and clotted cream were absolutely delicious. Topscone. They weren’t exactly cheap but you don’t get surroundings like this and the services of Paul for nothing. At the end of the day we were able to spend some money … mission accomplished!

Interior view of Peacock Alley at Waldorf Astoria, EdinburghBack to the reality and the chaos of Brexit! Perhaps the UK should take a leaf out of Trump’s book? Did we actually just say that? Lock up all our MPs without pay until they come to a consensus. In the circumstances we think that, since the experts are completely clueless perhaps the decision should be put back to the man in the street. Not every man in the street, just the one who wants to stay in the EU.

Just think! If Scotland had got its independence in 2014 we could have avoided all this nonsense. We could just have looked on and laughed like the rest of the world. As The Donald would say … sad! The sooner Scotland ditches Westminster the better … FREEDOM!!

EH1 2AB             tel: 0131 222 8945                 Peacock

english, Scones, Top

Orange Pekoe – Revisited

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A Christmas decoration at Orange Pekoe tea house in Barnes, LondonThe last time we reviewed a scone at Orange Pekoe the mighty David Cameron was in power. He had just bored a small child half to death with one of his storytelling photo opportunities. It was only a month to go before the EU referendum he had called to resolve all his political problems. Oh, if he had just waited for the result, what a story he could have told then! Except he mysteriously vanished and hasn’t been seen since?

Plonkers

We have come to the conclusion that the subsidies that schools like Eton, Harrow and Westminster enjoy should be withdrawn. They are supposed to produce fine upstanding leaders to rule over us and set an example to us ordinary folk who cannot afford such an elite education. Their primary purpose, of course, is to maintain the system whereby the country’s wealth is retained by them. In recent years, or perhaps always, they have failed completely in this relatively simply task. Instead they have produced a long line of plonkers. Plonkers or not, credit where credit’s due, they have managed to retain their wealth. Stop the privileges for the privileged we say! Interior view of Orange Pekoe tea house in Barnes, LondonRadical or what?

Anyway, enough of that. London is awash with eating places. Sometimes, however, in such cosmopolitan surroundings, a simple scone can be surprisingly difficult to find. As you know we have reviewed upmarket Claridge’s and top of the range Connaught but our favourite remains this tiny tea house in Barnes. It’s friendly and informal atmosphere is very reassuring. It’s always nice to be greeted with “just the usual” when you walk in after not having been near the place for months.  Naturally it serves wonderful food and, of course, a wide range of teas. A scone at Orange Pekoe tea house in Barnes, LondonWe come here a lot for breakfast but, since the last review was three years ago, we thought we should check the scones again on your behalf.

There was no need to worry our fruit scone came just as it had the last time, deliciously warm and with lots of everything to go with it. Ten out of ten for consistency and absolutely no problem awarding a topscone.

Panto

Orange Pekoe revisited means we are just a short hop up the Thames from the Palace of Westminster and coming up to Christmas it’s panto time again. Never mind Aladdin and Cinderella though the best pantomime this year is definitely here at Westminster … “will she, won’t she?”, “they’re behind you”! Our politics is all happening in typically chaotic pantomime fashion, only with none of the humour! No matter what the result is of tonight’s vote of no confidence in Theresa May, the Brexit pantomime looks set to continue indefinitely. Thank you Orange Pekoe for providing a strong and stable oasis of calm.

SW13 0PX      tel: 020 88766070       www.orangepekoeteas.com

Scones, Top

Darcy’s – Princes Square

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Sometimes you just get the urge. You just fancy something! Maybe you fancy a classic mojito, perhaps a strawberry fizz mocktail; maybe a spot of face painting; or even a full blown lunch with private dining; maybe some live music. Or maybe you just want to stay in the EU or maybe you just never want to hear of Brexit ever again! Well, you can have all of these (except the last two) at Darcy’s in Glasgow’s Princes Square. All Ted Baker and Vivienne Westwood, Princes Square is a rather upmarket glitzy shopping centre. Darcy’s is just one of a dozen restaurants.

Christmas lights in Royal Exchange Square, Glasgow
Christmas comes to Glasgow’s Royal Exchange Square
Epic messes

It was over two years ago that we were here having afternoon tea at Cranachan and berating them for serving fully loaded scones. As you all know by now, a cardinal sin in our eyes. We were also feeling a bit sorry for Jeremy Corbyn. He had just done unexpectedly well in the general election but was being given a hard time for not singing while everyone else was trying to enlist God’s help in saving HRH. Things haven’t got any better for him in the intervening years but it’s all of his own making. Any sympathy we may have had has long since evaporated. Unbelievably, he actually might even have a chance of winning a general election should one be called. Not because of anything he has done but simply because of the epic mess the Tories are currently making of just about everything.. Internal view of Darcy's Café, Prices Square, Glasgow

Okay, okay what about Darcy’s scones? It’s busy busy and there was only a single table left when we arrived. The whole place had a nice buzz about it. That buzz however may have given rise to a slight hiccup at the beginning when, having waited for about five minutes, we had to go and find someone to serve us. However, after that we were looked after very well. A scone at Darcy's Café, Prices Square, GlasgowOur scones came on very large plates which we were sure were the same as we had when reviewing our Liberty of London scone. That was also over two years ago so how sad is it that we remember things like the plates? My coffee was great and came complete with a little amaretti biscuit … nice!.

Anyway the plates certainly didn’t cramp our lovely warm fruit scones … nicely presented with a pat of butter, a pot of the ubiquitous Tiptree jam and a ramekin of cream with a strawberry on top. What’s not to like? In the end we decide to forgive the hiatus in service and award a topscone. Well done Darcy’s.

Face painting

 Just in case we have fired up anyone’s interest in face painting, it takes place every Sunday between 1 and 3pm and everyone goes home with a balloon! Remember to have a scone as well!

French newspaper covering at Darcy's Café, Prices Square, Glasgow
Pillars covered in old French newspapers??
Landing on Mars

We weaved our way back to the railway station through dozens of beggers sitting in the wet and cold. We also learned that we have successfully landed a spaceship on Mars … hurragh! With all these beggers, food banks and 1 in 4 children living in poverty, lets hope, if they find anything at all on Mars, it’s a moral compass?

G1 3JN        tel: 0845 166 6012        Darcy’s

ps: Attention all telephone box enthusiasts. Obviously this not a K6  but a somewhat different concrete police telephone box. The only similarity to a K6 is that its door is also made of teak. Originally all police telephone boxes were coloured red and only changed to blue because of the popularity of Dr Who. None of the BBC’s props have actually been true to the original design. The explanation is that its chameleon circuits sometimes drift a little if left in the same position for too long. This particular TARDIS in Buchanan Street did not really contain a huge Bier Halle  full of drunken Germans. Although we didn’t actually look inside??Tardis in Buchanan Street, Glasgow

Scones, Top

Mason Belles Kitchen

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At the end of an alleyway in Linlithgow there is this little plaque, about 15cms in diameter. Linlithgow wall plaque bearing inscription to St MichaelIt’s a depiction of Linlithgow’s town motto – ‘St Michael is Kind to Strangers’. A bit odd, you might think, as a town motto. However, St Michael, in his main role as chief opponent of Satan, seems to have been a general all round good guy. Probably still best known as the patron saint of Marks & Spencers, he was also written about in both the Old and New Testaments, the Hebrew bible and the Quran.  And, apparently he still looks after the inhabitants of this town and its strangers to this very day. So that’ll be us then!

Love affair

Would he be kind enough to help us find a decent scone? The alleyway was leading us in a definite direction so perhaps his hand was upon us? Actually, after our recent afternoon tea at One Devonshire, we could have had another here at Mason Belles were it not for the fact that we just walked in off the street without any advanced notice. Not that we could have given them much notice anyway. It’s only a few days since they opened their doors to the public. Formerly called Livingstone’s, one of our favourite restaurants, until it closed a year or so ago. We could just hop on the train for the ten minute ride from Falkirk and voila, we were here!  Livingstone’s was also responsible for introducing us to Angus the Bull cabernet sauvignon. An ongoing love affair … but that’s all history.

Now it has been reincarnated by Linsey Scott, a delightful lady with many years experience in some of Scotland’s best restaurants. Mason Belles Kitchen is her first venture on her own. Exterior view of Mason Belles Kitchen, LinlithgowIt is set well off the street in a garden area which is usually alive with squirrels, rabbits and birds but today it was quiet. Probably because the animals had more sense than us, coming out in the rain. Interior view of Mason Belles Kitchen, LinlithgowInside though, not only was it dry but warm and welcoming as well.

Rather randomly, the first people we met were old work colleagues we hadn’t seen in ages … brill! The girl looking after us had fairly obviously only been in the job for a few days, or maybe even a few hours. She had to go off and seek answers to all our questions but she did it beautifully. Turned out they only had plain scones so that simplified decision making immensely. A scone at Mason Belles Kitchen, LinlithgowOur friends ended up with strawberry scones … scones preloaded with cream and slices of fresh strawberry. It wasn’t what they had asked for but, since they looked so nice, they just accepted and enjoyed them nevertheless.

Divine help

We tend to like quite small scones and these fitted the bill perfectly. Small but delicious and accompanied by fabulous blackcurrant jam and a lovely copper pot of cream. The coffee was excellent as well. Another special blend from our favourite coffee company, Henry’s. What more could we ask for? St Michael had indeed been extremely kind, not only finding our long lost friends, but a topscone as well! With divine help like this, Linsey and her team can’t help but flourish.

Interior view of Mason Belles Kitchen, Linlithgow
Part of the dining room

 

Obviously the main church in town is St Michael’s, where Mary Queen of Scots was christened. It had been around since 1138 as a Catholic church but shortly after the christening it was ransacked by Protestants. They eventually repaired the church and  have used it as their own ever since. The Protestant church took their role as guardians of the town’s morality very seriously.

Repeatedly Eurupean

The church had a repentance stool on which transgressors guilty of drunkeness, adultery or whistling would have to sit in full view of the entire congregation. Repeat offenders were chained by the neck at the church door. Oh, those were the days! We are pretty sure that Theresa May would have Michel Barnier sat on the repentance stool for daring to defy the mighty United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Meanwhile Jean Claude Juncker’s neck would be in irons at the door …  just for being repeatedly European! Theresa’s now gaining a pitying respect from the public who always like an underdog. As a kind of ‘billy no mates’ …  watching her perform is kind of embarrassing. Like sitting by a guillotine of old, where you can’t bear to look but can’t help it either. She needs to get St Michael onside!The logo of Mason Belles Kitchen, LinlithgowEH49 7AE        01506 843867             Mason Belles FB

ps: JOGLE friends (John o’Groats to Land’s End) walkers and are nearing the end of their incredible  journey. You can follow their adventures at: heatherstevesduncansbyheadtolandsend.wordpress.com