Category Archives: self-service

self-service

Gallery of Modern Art

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Have not been to the Gallery of Modern Art (GoMA) for some time so it is nice to be back. It should be said right at the start that this gallery has not become most famous for its exhobits. Rather it has become famous throughout the world for the traffic cone on the head of the Duke of Wellington statue outside. Today his horse was taking a turn of wearing it. There are dedicated followers of the cone .. called ‘coneys‘. Like sconeys but not as sensible. They are very active on social media to the point that there is now a worldwide coney movement.

Drunken students

Originally placed there by a drunken student almost thirty years ago, the city fathers used to religiously remove it They thought it was befitting a city of Glasgow’s stature. Fa

Dome above the stairwell at the Gallery of Modern Art, Glasgow
Dome above the stairwell

ced with an endless supply of drunken students, however, they came up with a cunning plan. Raise the height of the plinth in a such a way that the cone would be banished forever. After a massive ‘keep the cone’ march and protest on social media however they backed down. Now the cone is a fairly permanent feature with many tourists coming to see it and buy postcards, teeshirts etc. Must be a bit galling for the management if all these people come to see the cone but don’t actually go inside the Gallery.

Internal view of the café at the Gallery of Modern Art, Glasgow
downstairs cafe and library

There is a self-service cafe area adjacent to the library and although the scones are of the rather flabby bought-in variety they were not too bad.

Holding your breath

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Another exhibit took us back to an earlier post about suffragettes. One suffragette in particular, Christabel Pankhurst  .. and here she was again. Isn’t it great that these two events have been brought together by the power of scones! Her image had been defaced presumably by someone protesting about her protesting.

Isolation

Feeling inspired by what we had seen. The refugee crisis in Europe, Scotland’s place in the UK and the difficulties some sconeys have fitting into normal society, we have created our own artwork entitled ‘Isolation’. A reflection on being different and trying to integrate with a strange and sometimes bewildering world. Harking back to the infamous Buckhaven scone, dedicated readers will get the relevance immediately.

ISOLATION
ISOLATION

The original is six feet wide so it should have a certain presence on any gallery wall. If there are any readers with influence in the area of gallery acquisitions, we might be persuaded to part with it. Lottery funding may be necessary! Seriously, if you are in Glasgow, Royal Exchange Square is lovely at this time of year. And GoMA is definitely worth a visit. You might be inspired as well!

G1 3AH     tel: 0141 287 3050       GoMA

self-service

Glamis Castle

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In this post we are visiting Glamis Castle for their Christmas Fayre. However we did not expect it to be anything like as busy as it was. It was mobbed. Great for fund raising and for all the locally based traders who had set up stalls in the castle grounds. Maybe not so good if you are waiting for a scone in a long queue.

Situated near the pretty village of Glamis there has been a castle here since 1376 though most of the present building dates from the 18th century. It has had a fairly chequered history with tales of witchcraft, ghosts, monsters and people being bricked up in rooms. Must be great to have enough rooms that, if you take a dislike to one of your guests, you just brick’em up!  The castle was the setting for Shakespeare’s MacBeth and was also the birthplace of Princess Margaret. However, it is probably most famous as the childhood home of Lady Elizabeth Bowes-Lyon who eventually became the wife of King George VI in 1937. After his death she went on to become Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother. Glamis 02

There is not much we can say about the obscene wealth and privilege of monarchy without the distinct risk of being cast into the Tower of London and left to rot for ever. Perhaps the least said the better. Having said that, the Queen Mum is a bit of a hero. She had a magnificent wine cellar which we are trying hard to replicate. Best of all, however, she managed to die owing umpteen millions. Something we would love to emulate but are still looking for the right backer. Despite their largesse with royalty, we suspect that Coutts  bank would not happily entertain rather lowly sconeys. Even with our equally hedonistic lifestyle!

a very busy castle café
a very busy castle café
Minions

Because of the Christmas Fayre the castle’s old kitchen, which serves as a restaurant/tearoom, was busy busy busy. The staff were all working their socks off but in spite of lengthy queues everyone seemed happily imbued with Christmas spirit. Content to wait their turn, chatting to each other. Don’t think there would have been any direct royal involvement in the making of our scones. Probably just a minion somewhere, but tGlamis 04hey were very good. Well endowed with fruit; lots of jam and cream; nice crunchy exterior, but just one problem … a tad overdone on the bottom. A relatively small problem for us. However, since the royals are obviously avid readers of ‘thescones’, that poor minion is probably being bricked up as we speak!

roast toasty wood burning stove in the old original range
roasty toasty wood burning stove in the old original range

Just to go off at a tangent for a minute … the NHS figures recently released by the government showing that NHS Scotland is the best performer in the UK. That’s good news. We mention it here simply because, despite extensive coverage, you will not find that particular nugget mentioned anywhere by the BBC, not even BBC Scotland, so you may have missed it.

Refuweegees

Another thing you may have missed is the arrival of a new dictionary word; refuweegee …  a person who upon arrival in Glasgow is embraced by the people of the city, a person considered to be a local. Isn’t that rather nice in this season of goodwill to all men. A sentiment very much in evidence amongst all the holly, mince-pies and of course, the scones, at Glamis. Unfortunately, if you are one of the few who did not make it to the Christmas Fayre you will just have to wait until next year. It is on for three days but by the time you read this it will be too late .. sorry!

DD8 1RJ     tel: 01307 840393      Glamis Castle

self-service

The Scottish Parliament

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Well, well, well, look where we are. Once you have endured the airport style security this is quite a pleasant building to be in. Not grand and imposing like it’s southern counterpart, but friendly and, even with the slightly austere design, welcoming. It’s very much a talking shop, rather than a coffee shop (is there a difference). Although we have been here several times before it has never been when the Parliament has been in session. The hope was that today was to be one of glorious enlightenment .. and maybe a scone.Parliament 02

But, for the moment, never mind the controversies raging in the debating chamber, the entire history of the Scottish Parliament is highly controversial. In spite of the very British illusion of democracy embedded in the ‘Mother of Parliaments’ and all that, almost thirty years ago the EU found the UK to be one of the most undemocratic states in the EU. As a result the European Commission forced devolution on John Major’s government to try and create more localised accountability. Major hated the whole idea but was perhaps fortunate in being deposed and able to hand on the poisoned chalice to Tony Blair. He hated it just as much, if not more.

In fact he hated it so much that on the eve of the inauguration of the Scottish Parliament he secretly redrew the border between Scotland and England. It meant that the ownership of seven North Sea oil fields were transferred to England with  consequentially dramatic effects on each country’s GDP figures. Presumably it was in case the Scots got a bit above themselves.

Controversy also followed the construction program with an eventual cost overrun of almost £400m .. ouch!!

the foyer area
the foyer area

Designed by a Catalan architect, Enric Miralles, it has been described it as “a Celtic-Spanish cocktail to blow both minds and budgets. It doesn’t play safe, energetically mining a new seam of National Romanticism refined and reinterpreted for the twenty-first century”. Whatever, we rather like it.
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Rapprochement

The debating chamber is built above the public areas to remind those in it that they are only there at the behest of those below them. Not sure that bit is working too well but the theory is good. Parliament 05We already know that the First Minister is a dab hand at making scones but if the 129 MSPs had anything to do with the scones in the tearoom, there must have been some sort of cross party rapprochement. They were not too bad .. nowhere near topscone but quite good all the same. Pre-packaged jam; butter a bit too hard; on the expensive side for self-service. Perhaps a scone designed by a committee?Parliament 01

We listened with interest to a session in the chamber but much of it was fairly opaque. A plethora of acronyms, can make it difficult to follow proceedings if you are not familiar with each and every one. Nevertheless we did find it an enlightening experience and it was good to see it all in full flow.

Searching for democracy

You would think that with the formation of the Scottish Parliament that the UK democracy issue would have dramatically improved. It hasn’t. If anything this place is akin to a sticking plaster. Recently, 97% of Scottish MPs voted against bombing Syria, but you all know what happened there. There are countless examples like this; nuclear weapons; the EU; trade union laws; the Scotland Bill; human rights; tax credits, where the Scottish voice matters not a jot. If you live in Scotland it is almost pointless voting. Parliament 09 Any system where one set of MPs is outnumbered 12 to 1 is self evidently flawed and certainly not geared to Scotland’s best interests.

If Scotland were not in a union with England and the top 100 UK secondhand car salesmen were given the task of selling the current union deal to the Scottish electorate they would not have a snowball’s. On top of all this the current government is intent on reducing our democracy even further. Chipping away at trade unions and eroding our human rights. They might as well be open about it and hand the whole thing over to the corporates and banksters who actually run everything at the moment. It’s enough to make you choke on your committee scone!

EH99 1SP       tel: 0131 348 5200       The Scottish Parliament

self-service

M&S Café

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M&S 010Ok, lower the lights, cue soft sexy music, “because this not just a scone … its an M&S scone“. A very successful TV ad that has fallen into everyday usage to describe everything other than what it was supposed to, M&S food. But this is food and it’s M&S food so will it live up to the hype? No problem, probably the best self service scone we have had so far. There were a couple of problems though; the coffee was decidedly average and the butter was too hard to spread on a light fluffy scone.

The scones, however, were very good .. Pat had a very good cheese one. Now here is an interesting thing. In our last post you will remember that we were having to rough it at Gleneagles where everything was brought to us at our seat in front of the big open fire by a team of waiting staff. Everything was absolutely first class. M&S 03By comparison, for the rather spartan surroundings of the self service M&S scones we had to buy jam and cream separately so that, unbelievably, they ended up more expensive than the Gleneagles ones. In total, for exactly the same order, Gleneagles was just slightly more expensive because of the coffee. But the coffee was perfect, a hundred times better than M&S. Just goes to show! One scone experience was light years ahead of the other but both cost much the same. Just so as you know.

Paris and Beirut

Understandably the news is still dominated by the Paris catastrophe. However in its attempt to provide 24hr coverage the BBC has been reduced to wittering rather than reporting. If there were to be a scone disaster in Azerbaijan, we are sure the BBC would immediately be able to go over to their own scone correspondent in Baku. The day before Paris there were around 50 people killed in an IS bomb attack in Beirut  that went completely unreported, not a single cheep. Never mind what that says about standards of reporting, what does it say about us? Did they just not want to bother us? What is the difference between the Paris and Beirut? M&S 02It is also sad to see the knee-jerk responses from politicians. Declarations of pitiless war and increased security measures everywhere.

Double standards

Do they not understand that that is why we are in this mess and that a war on terrorism is about as futile as a war on drugs. Amongst all the talk there seems to be no cognisance of what appears to us to be the only way forward. Go after Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Kuwait and the UAE who, directly or indirectly, provide funds and succour to IS and al-Qaida. Make them pariah states, freeze their assets, let them know that they are not welcome. Instead of feting them like royalty, send their diplomats home. Whatever it takes until they sort themselves out! But of course that way might harm the bankers and arms dealers and that would be unthinkable. For every bullet fired and every bomb dropped they whoop joyously.

Getting things in proportion

It would probably mean a drop in our standard of living but we think we could get by on just one scone every second day if it meant we could live without fear. Oh no, just remembered that the US standard of living is non-negotiable so that probably is not going to work. And, of course, our media all too often simply reflects the foreign policy objectives of our governments. If we may continue the TV ad analogy .. if Carlsberg made foreign policy disasters?  Just remember, as our government ramps up the terror alert to “severe” that as many people have been killed by bee stings in the last decade as in terror incidents. Maybe even as many people have choked to death on scones?M&S 07

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self-service

Caffé Nero

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Now you might be a bit surprised by this post because we are reviewing a multinational coffee house. Caffé Nero to be exact. One of these dastardly companies that pays no tax. Prepare yourself for a bit of a rant. Of course we never thought we would have to review such places because we didn’t think any of them did scones .. but we were mistaken, Caffé Nero does, maybe because it is British, so we felt duty bound to give them a try.

Tax

The whole tax thingy is a bit of a mess. Starbucks takes the brunt of the criticism because they are the biggest and the most famous. Nero 03Caffé Nero has not paid any UK tax since 2008 because it exploits the same loopholes that Starbucks and all the others use. Boots has avoided £1.2b by simply not being registered in the UK. There is nothing illegal about this practice so our sympathies lie with the companies which, like all companies, are duty bound to maximise profits for their share holders. Otherwise they are deemed to be negligent. The problem lies with the loopholes themselves and that’s a governmental issue.

Loopholes

The UK government gets a lot of stick for not closing them but, if you are expecting them to take decisive action any time soon, don’t hold your breath. Most of the government exploits the exact same loopholes for their own personal benefit. Luckily, the European Commission is not so queasy about tackling the problem. They recently decreed that Starbuck’s tax exemption in the Netherlands amounted to a state subsidy and was therefore illegal. As a consequence they were ordered them to repay £22m to the Dutch government. They did the same for Fiat which is registered in Luxembourg and presumably this principle will apply to all multinationals in due course. If it does we should all benefit .. hurrah!

Going offshore

As far as the UK is concerned there may also be light at the end of the tunnel. Not because of government action, heaven forbid, but because, Crickhowell, a small town in Powys, has elected to move ‘offshore’.  It has registered all it’s businesses in the Isle of Man … the same as Caffé Nero. Now they will no longer have to pay tax either .. brilliant! No skullduggery .. all done in discussion with HMRC.  If all towns were to follow suit, and we cannot see why they wouldn’t, perhaps then the UK government might eventually waken up to the concerns of ordinary people who have to pay every last penny in tax .. or go to jail. Enough of all that frippery we hear you cry .. the scones!

Black magic

Penegra is frequently a type of Simple generic levitra, that is detailed including sildenafil citrate, the best medication that really works effectively in treating feebleness challenges. Vitamin A, C and E especially are needed for curing this levitra sample problem. You can maintain higher levitra price http://appalachianmagazine.com/2017/06/20/berkeley-house-staunton-virginias-secret-gem/ levels of testosterone naturally by combining exercises along with intake of balanced diet. It can be taken when generic sildenafil from india you intent to make love. Reviewing this particular Caffé Nero is a little unusual because it means that the result applies across all of it’s 600 outlets. They are all the same. It is their main selling point. When you go into a Caffé Nero, or a Starbucks for that matter, you know exactly what environment and quality to expect .. fantastico! Not sure how they do it, presumably there is some sort of black magic involved, but the scone we have here in Falkirk will be exactly the same as the one we would have in Canterbury or Belfast or wherever. Is that just clever, or is it slightly spooky? Nero 02

Our scone came complete with butter and jam and, if we had wanted, a sealed tub of clotted cream. All in all it was quite good. Doesn’t fit the criterion, so it never had a hope of getting a topscone award. However, we can see how folk coming into Caffé Nero could ask for this and enjoy it, so hats off to them for being able to produce this level of standardised product across its empire.

Scotland Bill

The bad news today is that 10 Tory MPs sat through the debate on the Scotland Bill then 400 came in to vote down all the Scottish amendments. It will now fester for months in the unelected Lords. The good news is that a wee firm in Crieff is to start exporting oil to the Middle East. Okay it’s rapeseed oil … but still. Maybe they would like scones as well?

FK1 1NR             tel: 01324 623906             Nero

Scones, self-service

St Mungo Museum

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This place, St Mungoi Museum of Religious Life, is very familiar. We both used to work in the adjacent Glasgow Royal Infirmary which you can see in the background on the left.

cafe area at the Museum of Religious L:ife, Glasgow
cafe area

We would sometimes come here for lunch if we wanted a change of scene. Also to look at Salvador Dali’s, Christ of St John of the Cross, bought by Glasgow in the 50s and now estimated to be worth in excess of £60m. Apparently Dali wanted £12,000 but Glasgow made him an offer he couldn’t refuse – £8,200 .. we dread to think. Didn’t see it this time though as it has been moved to the city’s Kelvingrove Gallery. The museum itself is interesting. It was built in 1989  and designed to reflect the architecture of the Bishops’ Castle which stood on this site in the 17th century. It aims to bring together differing faith systems and promote greater understanding.

Zen

It has Britain’s first zen garden and a Clooty Tree, which we always thought was a solely Tibetan tradition. Apparently, though, it is also Scottish, dating back to pre-Christian times. We don’t know of anywhere else where you can see so many works of art and other artefacts brought together from the six big religions: Islam, Hinduism, Judaism, Christianity, Buddhism and Sikhism. All sitting side by side, displaying the huge diversity of belief systems. Also the extraordinary lengths believers go to in creating these amazing artefacts. Each and every one designed to appeal to hearts and minds.

Nicola Sturgeon, a well known sconey, was after hearts and minds yesterday as she delivered her keynote speech to the SNP conference. A speech that the leaders of other parties must have wished they could have delivered. One of strength and unity. A scone at the Museum of Religious Life in GlasgowSince this place is all about understanding we wonder at the lack of understanding from Westminster for Scotland’s desire to simply stand on it’s own two feet. It’s not such a big ask, surely? Okay, okay, what about the scones?

Well the café area is pleasant enough and in keeping with the architecture of the rest of the building. Their scones, however,(bought in) are best described as ‘ordinary’. Don’t let that put you off visiting the museum.

part of the zen garden
part of the zen garden

G4 0RH       tel: 0141 276 1625      Museum of Religious Life & Art

foreign, Ordinary, self-service

The Duke Restaurante

Now here’s a wee change; no it’s not Portobello, or Bournemouth,  it’s the view from the Duke restaurant in Palmanova, Majorca. Not that we have been there, mind you. Friends of ours were, however, and they Spain 02decided to keep us up to date with the Spanish scone situation. According to them it’s nothing to write home about but they thought they would anyway! The scone was okay, the cream was not up to much but just eating a scone in 35 degrees of heat was something of a heroic feat in itself. They did it for us Spain 01and the enlightenment of our readers .. such sacrifice! Spain 04

All peace and tranquility here, lying on the beach quaffing beer. In the far north of the country, however, the Catalan people have recently been trying to persuade the Madrid government that they should have some say in running their own affairs. Can you think of any similarities closer to home? They have been subjected to exactly the same extreme propaganda war that Scotland suffered during the 2014 referendum. However, no sooner had Catalan president Artur Mas guided his nationalist coalition to victory at Catalonia’s elections last Sunday night than a court in Madrid announced that Mas would face formal charges relating to civil disobedience and the ‘usurpation’ of Spanish constitutional powers.

Exotic

It’s not just the UK government that’s a bit slow on the uptake! Anyway many thanks to C&D for making this post more exotic than usual. Looking forward to the next holiday scone report!

07181 Palmanova       tel: 971108205      The Duke Restaurante TA

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

The Sands Café/Bistro

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It was an absolutely glorious day when we arrived at the Silver Sands beach at Aberdour. There were eight of us in total and having done the required paddling with the kids it was not long before hunger pangs were setting in. We headed en-mass towards the Sands Café/Bistro a little further along the beach. External view of the Sands Café in Aberdour

With the weather being so wonderful it was very busy but the service we received was second to none. Nothing was too much trouble. One of the staff kindly extended the awning to protect us and the kids from the sun. We sampled everything from burgers to ice cream but of course the rather large scones were very tempting too. A cherry scone at the Sands Café in AberdourWe chose the cherry ones though there were also plain and fruit available. All home baked and very good. No cream, so not quite topscone but pretty close and definitely head of our self service category.

Failures promoted to Lords

With the sun beating down, looking out over the beach towards Edinburgh, Arthur’s Seat and Berwick Law it seems like a different world. A sort of dream world. In the actual world however there are sinister goings on. Two senior politicians who lost their seats in the General Election are to be made knights of the realm!! They lost their seats because the people did not want them but now are to sit in the Upper House, against the wishes of the people. They will legislate on behalf of the people who unelected them in the first place?? Did I just make that up? I wish I had. In this day and age it seems unbelievable that such things can happen in the name of democracy! We desperately need a new system where unelected lackeys and party donors are not allowed to lord over us.

Meanwhile in Aberdour, no such troublesome thoughts are disturbing those intent on building sand castles, digging holes and swimming in the sea … nor should it!

View from the Sands Café in Aberdour looking towards Edinburgh
Looking towards Edinburgh,  Arthur’s Seat and Salisbury Crags


KY3 0RQ        tel:01383 861473           Silver Sands

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

EICA

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Climber at the Edinburgh International Climbing ArenaWow, what an amazing place this is! On our way back from Edinburgh airport we decided to visit the EICA, Edinburgh International Climbing Arena at Ratho. Having spent most of my youth hitchhiking to Glencoe every weekend in order to do silly things on rock faces it was both fascinating and slightly disturbing to see what was going on here.

Fascinating in the sense that there were loads of people doing all sorts of climbs in absolute safety, and disturbing because this, for me at least, seemed to detract from the essence of rock climbing where there was always an element of risk. Sometimes quite a big element. The complete absence of risk was all a bit strange. I wondered how transferable the skills learned here would be to a relatively unstable rock face. Perhaps they are not meant to transfer and remain steadfastly within environments such as this magnificent arena. I guess it is whatever turns you on. Orange scone at the Edinburgh International Climbing Arena

Anyway, in the interests of indulging my risk taking tendencies, a scone seemed like a good bet. They only had orange scones left .. now that is risky. Maybe not as risky as the youngest MP, Mhairi Black, only 20, to enter the Commons for over 100 years delivering a first class hard hitting maiden speech only to be largely ignored by the media .. what a shame. Turned out that the orange scone was not that risky after all because it was actually rather good and a new experience for both of us. The EICA has loads of facilities for toddlers to pensioners. A wonderful discovery .. we will be back.

EH28 8AA              tel:0131 333 6333           EICA

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

IKEA Edinburgh

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No it wasn’t flat packed and no we did not even need an allan key. The scones at IKEA Edinburgh come in much the same way as any other.A scone at IKEA Edinburgh We had arrived here with an IKEA virgin. Honestly we thought that everyone in the world had been here at some point in their lives .. if not every weekend. It was great to see it through fresh eyes so to speak. You have got to hand it to them, they think of just about everything.

After  the IKEA journey (follow the arrows) it is perhaps just as well that they have a watering hole at the end of the trail because. By that time, it is very welcome if not absolutely necessary. Internal view of IKEA EdinburghIn true IKEA style there are no frills. Self service, follow the arrows, pour your own coffee/tea (as much as you like). Because of all that .. very reasonable prices. Our scone had surprisingly light texture and, all things considered, was rather good.

Solitary Tory

A) the Queen’s speech managed, better than any other single event, to demonstrate how out of touch and incongruous the Westminster establishment has become. As someone said “a woman in a £1m hat delivers speech on austerity“. B) the draft Scotland Bill has seen the light of day and surprise surprise it outlines some totally inadequate powers for Scotland. They can only be used if the Scottish Government seeks permission from the single Tory MP in Scotland. C) the LibDems sought to defend the dishonesty of their single Scottish Rt Honourable member by saying that all MP’s lie. You could not make it up. Something has got to change!

EH20 9PW          tel: 020 3645 0000           IKEA Edinburgh