Category Archives: Scones

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Myrtle House Café

Do you sometimes find yourself wondering if the past year has just been a dream … a not very nice dream. And that you will suddenly wake up and it will all be over? After a while the whole COVID thing gets to you like that. One of the Australian aboriginal Dreaming stories tells of Baiame, a creational ancestral hero.

Mount Yengo
2,192 ft high Mount Yengo, the Uluru of the east

He came down from the sky to find the earth bare and dark. He decided to make it light and created plants, animals and rivers to make it beautiful. When he finished he jumped back up to the sky and, in doing so, he flattened the top of Mount Yengo. It’s a sacred site and you are requested not to climb it but we think the world could do with another visit from Baiame … there is much in need of attention.  We tell you all this because at the foot of Mt Yengo is the Myrtle House Cafe where you can get scones. Another sacred place, perhaps? 

Freedom

And how do we know all this … our Bathurst correspondents, of course. Once again we are indebted. If it wasn’t for them we wouldn’t have a clue what was happening sconologically down under. Their latest report started by telling us that cricketing legend Don Bradman actually started his career trying to play his first love, tennis. They soon get down to the scones, however, and end up here in Myrtle House. Bear in mind that our correspondents, although restricted by COVID, have much greater freedom to travel than we do. In their own words:

“On the road again, this time going north to our niece’s farm at a little village called Laguna on the Broke Road in the Hunter Valley. Erica and husband Brett and three small children have just moved up here from Sydney to escape the city rat race. Great for Covid protection as well.

the Fresh Denman cafe

On the way we lunched on bacon and egg rolls at a café called Fresh Denman, preceded of course by a scone entrée. The scone looked great but faded a bit on the tasting, maybe a 5 out of 10. Certainly not a top scone, perhaps a middling one if that term that can be used in scone hierarchy.

Lemonade

A couple of days later we had breakfast at a café called Myrtle House in Wollombi, just north of Laguna, starting of course with the obligatory B&E roll. “Do you also serve scones” I asked our waitress. “Of course we do mate” came the reply. “In fact, they are made to the famous Country Women’s Association (CWA) recipe, lemonade and all”. After that we had to order a serving. Better than the Denman ones, but a slight taste of sourdough, must have been the lemonade. 7 out of 10.

A crape myrtle tree
Crape myrtle trees surround the cafe
The CWA

The Country Women’s Association has become a recurring theme. First mentioned when our Toowoomba correspondents wrote about it in a post from the Angel Cafe. Then we provided their scone recipe in the The Old Workshop Cafe – Again post and latterly we actually bought a virtual Devonshire tea from them (it was for a good cause) in the Machrie Bay Tearoom – Again post. 

Ancestors

The Aboriginals believed that the entire world was made by their Ancestors way back in the very beginning of time … the Dreamtime. The Ancestors made everything and therefore everything is sacred and must be treated with respect. What would the Ancestors make of the current wrangling between the EU and the UK over imports and exports to N. Ireland. In fact, what would the Ancestors make of anything these days? Perhaps the world would be a nicer place if we took a leaf out of the Aboriginal’s book. 

NSW 2325               tel: (02) 4998 3220                 Myrtle House

///supernatural.reddest.seasonal

Scones, Uncategorized

Pat’s scones

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Before we treat you to a sample of Pat’s scones let us first take a look at the current lockdown situation. It isn’t getting less severe, the opposite if anything! And the end seems to get ever further away! As mouldy oldies we are getting our jabs in a couple of weeks but even that doesn’t appear to make that much difference. We can still become spreaders and it’s not until we get the second jab that the vaccine really becomes effective and goodness knows when that will be. Argh, the joys of COVID!Pat's scones

The Ununited Kingdom

Speaking of spreaders, Boris Johnston decided, a couple of days back, to grace Scotland with a whistle-stop tour. Goodness knows why? He must know that he is pretty much universally loathed north of the border. And of course the trip broke all the rules that apply to everyone else who has to live with the disastrous consequences of Westminster’s pathetic handling of the crisis. Increasingly  people realise that  many key government functions are only weakly anchored centrally. It’s London-centric credibility has been weakened and the UK now looks more and more like a fractured state. Then there’s Brexit!

Approval ratings

At the moment neither the Tories nor Labour have a snowball’s chance in hell of being elected in Scotland and as long as Boris maintains his current attitude he will remain the SNP’s most effective recruiting sergeant. Recently, in a poll, Nicola Sturgeon gained the highest approval rating of any UK politician  … and that’s in England where she holds no sway! Remarkable!

Withdrawal

So, Pat’s scones, what about them? In the last few posts we’ve done skillingsboller and we’ve done pumpernickel, neither of which have anything much to do with scones. To be fair, we have done a scone but it was from Australia.  That’s all very well but scone withdrawal symptoms eventually became fairly severe. It’s come to this, we have resorted to making our own. Not for the first time, of course, but we don’t normally resort to such drastic measures. To get the full scone experience you really need to go out and capture them in their natural habitat.  We were also having to do without the assistance of the two small Vikings we have deployed on some recent occasions. They were doing  schooling from home.

Pat made quite a large batch and then gave me two different presentations. Pat's scone with cream and jamPat's scone with cream and jamOne with a bowl of cream and a pot of homemade blackcurrant and gooseberry jam. Every thing was deliciousPat's scone with cream and crab apple jellyThe other came with  cream and crab-apple jelly. What’s not to like? Thankfully she did not ask me to judge which was best but suffice to say they were both fab! Can’t award a topscone because then that would infer that you could come and visit and sample them for yourselves … but you can’t! Nobody can! The joys of COVID!

A scone in the shape of a heartThis was my favourite. Very small and presented just on its own I think it was supposed to convey some sort of message. Aww!

Just heard that toilet brushes have become the official symbol of the Russian protests in support of Alexei Navalny. It’s a crazy mixed up world!

Keep safe everyone!

Scones, Uncategorized

Ramblings from Oz

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With the UK officially the worst country in the world for it’s handling of COVID, here’s a question! What do you do when you can no longer go out on scone adventures? What do you do when sconology grinds to a shuddering halt? And WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN ALL HOPE IS LOST? Okay, that’s three questions but you get the drift and no, the answer is not “phone the Samaritans”. The answer, of course, is to turn to our Bathurst correspondents in New South Wales. Unlike us, they have a government that does have a scoobie and, therefore, are not as restricted. They’ve sent us a wide ranging report covering isoglosses, cricketing legends and telephone boxes … and scones.. It’s modestly entitled Ramblings from Oz. You will see , however, that antipodean COVID life is not entirely straight forward either.

In their own words:

Sconeless in Sofala

Some time ago two friends of ours opened a café called the Painted Horse in Sofala, a quaint old gold mining town about 50 km from our home in Bathurst.

Julie Young in Rustic Cafe, Sofala
One of our Bathurst correspondents reflecting on normal life before her husband started taking an interest in scones. Taken at the scoreless Rustic Cafe in Sofala

They made scones to die for ! The downside is, I somehow deleted the photo I took on my phone, so there is no proof.  And there is more downside. The café closed down when Covid hit, and has been closed for the past 10 months or so. It has reopened with new owners, but no sign of our friends Nick and Kate.  We called in there a couple of weeks ago but not a scone to be seen, just some tired looking sausage rolls.

Covid 19

We are surviving pretty well Covidwise, just a handful of new cases every day in each state.  As soon as there is a bit of a flare-up in one state or another, the state Premiers start closing borders willy-nilly. We were supposed to meet our son and family at Victor Harbour, south of Adelaide this week, then bang, the NSW/SA border slammed shut and we had to cancel our house booking.  Then two days later the border was reopened.  All is not lost though as we have re-booked for the end of February. Here’s hoping we can get through then.

Isogloss

Not a word I had ever come across.  But your bit about how “scone” is pronounced in Ireland a few blogs ago was intriguing. You may recall that I referred to the town of Scone in one of my poems.  Well, Scone is pronounced to rhyme with “phone”. Here we have to take issue with our correspondents because normal pronunciation for the former home of the Stone of Destiny is actually “skoon”. Such are the  linguistic problems with English

Scones

Today we drove down to a place called Berrara where friends have a holiday house right on the coast.  scones in BowralWe are here for a few days, as travel within NSW is not restricted by Covid.  On the way we had morning tea with Julie’s sister and husband who live in a town called Bowral, which incidentally is where Donald Bradman started his cricket career. What did we get for morning tea, you guessed it, scones, of the savory kind, with cheese and fennel.  No faux pas on my part this time, wanting cream and jam, as was the case with the pumpkin scones of yesteryear.

Phone Boxes

Telephone box in Kangaroo ValleyAnd on the way, what should we see, not one, but two red phone boxes, sort of Siamese twins, in a town called Kangaroo Valley. Complete with black box and buttons A and B.  Not sure if they were actually working phones, or just a tourist prop, as Kangaroo Valley is a bit of a tourist trap. Never seen anything like that before. It certainly was not made in Falkirk.

As ever, we are indebted to A&J, our Bathurst correspondents. Your contributions are always extremely welcome. We also envy your ability to leave your house … forgotten what that’s like! It’s ironic  that Trump has gone and we still can’t go out safely!

Remember Gordon Brown, former Labour PM who was wheeled out by the Conservatives to spread gloom and doom during the 2014 Scottish Independence referendum. The Conservatives were too scared to come north of the border. In the style of Trumpery he told lie after lie and promised all would be well if we just stuck by the Union. Well, like the Creature From The Black Lagoon, he has emerged again to tell us that the UK is a failed state. Tell us something we don’t know Gordon. Scotland was telling you that in 2014 and has regretted heeding anything that came out of your mouth ever since.

“Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face, Great chieftain o the puddin’-race!” Tonight is Burns night which brings about the annual cull of hagisses. It’s the only way to keep the numbers down. We’ve only got a small one and it’s even smaller once the legs are off. Slàinte mhaith, enjoy yours!

Scones, Uncategorized

Scottish empire biscuits

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Having brought you Norwegian boller and German pumpernickel we thought something Scottish was somewhat overdue. So here we bring you Scottish empire biscuits! In some places they are called German biscuits but their origin actually lies with the Austrian Empire.

preparing empire biscuits
empire biscuits before assembly

These are a family favourite and always near the top of the list when visiting local cafés.  They are made of two shortbread biscuits glued together with jam, (like a jammy dodger)  covered with white water icing on and topped off with a glace cherry. Remember “topped off with a place cherry” for later. You can get a recipe here. 

Sensible human beings
preparing empire biscuits
one sensible human being icing empire biscuits

We made them with the assistance of the same two small Vikings we utilised in the skillingsboller post. Of course Scottish empire biscuits should ideally be made by a Scottish person. Both these small Vikings are a wee bit silly but thankfully they are half Scottish so if you add both these halves together you end up with one sensible Scottish human being … yeah!

Thrift

We started by making the individual biscuits then sticking them together with some jam before the fun part … icing. My mother was champion baker in Falkirk over many years and her name was on the trophy so many times it became embarrassing.  She used to make great empire biscuits and when entering a competition she always used at least half a cherry on top. And she would win first prize! When baking for the family, however, she gained notoriety by ever putting one sixteenth of a cherry on top. Such duplicitous behaviour typified my upbringing … it’s amazing I ended up as the well rounded character you know today. Her extreme thriftiness meant that, sometimes, I was even forced to help her cut them up! 

Scottish empire biscuits
empire biscuits

Anyway, enough of my rather silly mother, our one sensible Scottish human being had particular ideas about decoration. No glace cherries of any size (we didn’t have any) but all sorts of unicorns, rainbows and jelly tots instead … just  little bit silly. Must be the Viking side creeping in! We could be super critical about the shape and finish of the end results but we don’t wish to hurt anyone’s feelings. They were absolutely delicious. At least as good as any we have had anywhere! A mini triumph for a sensible Scottish human being!

These biscuits became known to more global audience when they featured during a hearty meal in Pixar’s Scottish fantasy film Brave. And once Scotland, as one of the last colonial remnants of the British Empire gains its independence, they may become known simply as “Scottish biscuits” … yeah!

Celebrations

With only hours to go before Trump leaves the White House, it is cause for celebration. Not only that but it’s followed a few days later by an even bigger one … Burns night.

wild haggis
wild haggis in the Highlands

Since millions of haggises will be eaten by Burns’ officianados toasting the life and times of our national bard we feel, particularly for our overseas readers, that some reassurance is required. Although there are some people who actually do go out and hunt haggis it is essentially an unnecessary pastime. You can find tips on how to catch a haggis here. The truth of it is that haggises have the same sacrificial instincts as cliff jumping lemmings. However, haggises stampede down off the hills and jump directly onto plates all over Scotland. No cruelty is involved … honest!

Scones, Uncategorized

Devil’s Fart

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No, we are not talking about Boris or Donald Trump! Devil’s fart is probably more widely known as pumpernickel, a dense German rye bread that’s name actually means “devil’s fart”. Apparently it has flatulence inducing properties. Never having experienced flatulence we thought it might be interesting to try it! pack of pumpernickelAnd if the packaging is anything to go by it may have other properties as well!! Okay, okay, if this all smacks of desperation then so be it. London is in danger of being overwhelmed by COVID so restrictions are becoming ever stricter everywhere. Who knows, the way things are going, we may not be allowed to look out the window, never mind go on sconing adventures.

Internationalism

The implications for our readers continuing education is worrying, however. Hence, following our previous post on Norwegian skillingsboller, we now bring you the German devil’s fart. It comes courtesy of our Münster correspondents who gave us some as a present. Many thanks to them for introducing us to pumpernickel and helping expand the cultural horizons of our readers.

Bad smells

It used to be found only in north west Germany but now you can get it pretty much anywhere. That said, European and American pumpernickel are different. The American pumpernickel has added ingredients and a higher baking temperature to provide shorter production times. Why oh why does the US need everything ‘fast’? Just chillax and do it properly! Perhaps, with Trump and his compadres only remaining as a bad smell, they may be able to do just that. Or is that wishful thinking?

pumpernickel unwrapped
Pumpernickel loaf unwrapped

So how do you eat pumpernickel?  As novices we started by slicing it the wrong way, before realising it was already sliced. It’s pretty solid and a little bit sticky so tends to appear like one solid dark block when it’s unwrapped. A bit like a pack of cheese slices. Not an auspicious start but how would it taste? That’s all that matters after all! In order to give it a fighting chance we decided to try it with a variety of toppings – cheese and ham, cheese  tomato and chutney, salami and mustard … and lastly just with some homemade plum jam.

Honest, officer!

selection of pumpernickel bitesThe bread itself has a grainy texture and a slightly sweet flavour that’s unusual but quite pleasant. Pat gave top marks to the cheese and ham. My preference was for the salami and mustard though all of them were actually very good. Will we be rushing out in search of devil’s fart? Well, if we cannot go out for scones then we can hardly go out for that. What would we tell the police if stopped? We’ll let you know about the flatulence … or maybe not!

ps: Our pumpernickel was a present and this week we received another. A parcel of framed photos from fellow photographer Dave Hunt. He operates from his Wildgrass Studio in beautiful Glen Lyon and specialises in vintage and fine art photography. Some time back we helped him experiment with his wet plate collodion technique. None of this instant digital nonsense for Dave, no, no, no!  He has to coat a plate of glass with light sensitive material, expose it in the camera while still wet and develop it all within about fifteen minutes. If it’s not quite right you just start again … simple!wet plate photo of Pat and I

He misplaced the plates during a house move but found them again recently and sent them on. How can we describe the results? “Brilliantly vintage”, perhaps … just like the sitters! The wonderful thing is that the 5″x4″ plate is completely unique … not another like it. Many thanks Dave, we love them all. Dave also says that these images should last for 200 – 300 years … and to let him know if they don’t. If you find life a bit too fast you can find out about this technique at one of Dave’s workshops. Can’t guarantee he will have such fantastic subjects though.

Scones, Uncategorized

Skillingsboller

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2020 wasn’t exactly a year to remember what with plague ravaging the country and mad politicians reaching new levels of lunacy. These things are mere trifles, however, when we tell you that the government has now told us to cease all sconological research forthwith! Sacre bleu! Okay, they didn’t actually get in touch with us specifically and tell us to desist  but they may as well.  Current COVID restrictions mean that we are not supposed to leave home except to care for others. We thought sconology fitted that brief perfectly but apparently, it doesn’t!  So, in order to further your knowledge and broaden your cultural horizons we bring you skillingsboller … a sort of Norwegian scone equivalent.

Happy New Year

But first we would like to wish a happy new year to all our readers and correspondents, we hope that 2021 is much better than the past year. 2020 was memorable for having absolutely nothing whatsoever to commend it. A complete disaster. It did, however, serve to demonstrate the difference between the EU and the UK.

The ‘U’ stands for ‘Unity’ in both their names but the five years of negotiations combined with coronavirus have had opposite effects in both states. On one hand the 27 countries of the EU showing admirable unity with a show of democracy in action. On the other hand the totally undemocratic UK falling apart at the seams with it’s ‘Unity’ under unprecedented strain.  All seventeen of the most recent opinion polls showing a clear majority in favour of Scottish independence and N.Ireland, is now left  closer to Dublin than London. Even England’s long-standing bedfellow, Wales, is getting fed up up with the Boris shambles and Westminster’s inane dictatorial style. And lo-and-behold, on top of all that we now have part of the Tory party launching a campaign to rejoin the EU. Aaargh! As messes go, this is pretty messy.

Coffee and boller

Enough of all that! Thanks to a Viking son-in-law we used to spend a lot of time in Norway. Being there was fantastic but of course there were no scones. They did however have boller (pronounced ‘bolly’) which are to Norwegians what croissants are to the French or scones are to the Brits. They are made with cardamon spice and can often have raisins or even chocolate chips in them. Absolutely delicious. We became addicted and ‘coffee and boller’ quickly became part of the daily routine.

On this occasion, being at home without access to boller or scones of any kind, we decided to make skillingsboller. It’s a derivative of boller,  a kind of cinnamon bun. Obviously you need a recipe but you also need the help of one big Viking and two small ones. This may be a problem for most folks but not for us … because we are blessed with all three!

rolling out the boller mixture

Don’t make skillingsoller if you are in a hurry. It’s not something you can rush. It takes 2-3 hours at least. But then, why would you be in a rush when you can’t even leave home? Get baking! Be warned though, if you decide to utilise the two small Vikings it can take even longer. Particularly at the icing stage!

Suffice to say that the resulting skillingsboller was absolutely delicious, a major triumph for all concerned.

What do you want?

Emboldened by success our Vikings then went on to make normal boller. holemade Norwegian bollerDon’t they look delish! If you can’t be bothered making them you can always visit United Bakeries in Oslo. There, you will find lots of boller of all kinds and a huge bowl of strawberry jam that you just help yourself to. Ah, memories! Boller is not a scone but if 2020 taught us anything it was that sometimes we can’t have everything we want. Hopefully in the not too distant future we will all have the ability to travel again and get what we want, what we really really want … sorry! Until then stay safe  wherever you are!

Ordinary, Scones

Klondyke Garden Centre

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Even though. we haven’t been able to travel much over the past year, it’s been eighteen months since we were last here at Klondyke Garden Centre … and it’s only five minutes away? A lot has happened in that time. Back then we were on a mission and the mission was … compost and lots of it! For reasons we can’t quite remember we likened the garden centre to a drug dealer dealing in compost … we must have been high on the stuff? This time we were also on a mission but now it was pot … a big black one to be precise! Back then the café was called the Topiary Coffee Shop but now it appeared to have changed its name to the Polmont Restaurant. We wondered if anything else had changed. Well, quite a lot actually. For a start, because of COVID regulations, the layout had been adapted with greater spacing and large perspex screens between the tables. What else?

External view of cafe at Klondyke Garden Centre

Wonders

Like everyone these days we are well used to scanning QR codes to give our contact details and get access to the menu. For us, however, this one was a bit different. Once you had done all that and got the menu up on screen you had to actually place your order and pay as well. Okey dokey! You’ve heard of the paperless office, well this was the waitressless café. Lunch and then a scone to share was what we wanted and, once we got the hang of it, the process was quite easy. We went through the menu and placed everything we wanted into our virtual basket, then we paid at the virtual checkout all rather familiar really. The wonders of QR (quick response) technology! And then we waited .. and waited … and waited.

No worries!

Twenty minutes later we realised other folks, who had come in after us, were getting food. Just then a lady appeared and asked if we had ordered. We said “yes” to which she asked “did you pay?” “Yes” to which she asked “did you use ApplePay?” “Yes” to which she replied “it didn’t work, can you check your bank account?” We did and there was no sign of the transaction. She then said “No worries, I can take your order, what did you want?” Argh! Having spent what seemed like half the day in the place we were no further forward. The wonders of QR technology!

Ordinary?

Never mind, everything would be fine when our food arrived and after a few more minutes it did. It was dumped on a table quite close to us in what was termed a “food drop zone”. Thankyou coronavirus, you have much to answer for. A scone at Klondyke Garden CentreLunch was mediocre at best and our scone came without the sharing plate we had asked for but by this time we were losing the will to live.

The scone had been hot when it reached the food drop zone but by the time we got to it, warmth was but a distant memory. Accompanied by the ubiquitous Tiptree jam (£0.50). Irish butter (£0.20) and a ‘healthy’ bowl of cream (£0.60), it wasn’t actually too bad in itself but probably more expensive than a Claridge’s scone. The overall experience had us scratching our heads trying to think of a categorisation below ‘ordinary’ but we gave up. We did get our big black pot though.

Deal or no deal

A big black hole might adequately describe the UK’s imminent departure from the EU. It was perfectly summed up the other day by a picture of Boris standing next to Ursula von der Leyen during BRexit talks. A bumbling shambolic mess standing next to a perfectly presented symbol of unity. We’ll leave you to work out which was which! Whatever happened to the “oven ready deal” Boris promised months ago or the “easiest deal in history” promised by Gove. Could it be that they are just pathological liars … perish the thought?

FK2 0XS          tel: 01324 717035          Klondyke

///jars.member.stamp

PS: Many thanks to our Middle East correspondent for sending us this link to the Irish Times about dialects in Eire. It uses the word ‘scone’ as an example.    “Picture a line across Ireland from Sligo through Leitrim and Cavan over to Louth. Below it, for most people, scone rhymes with ‘phone’; above it, with ‘gone’. Near the line, usage is more mixed. The line is an isogloss, like a weather-map isobar but showing where a linguistic feature stops or changes”. You see, sconology is not just about scones … now you’ve learned what an isogloss is. If you didn’t already know that is!

Our correspondent was mystified that his Granny always  insisted on  pronouncing her scones to rhyme with gone in spite of her being located in Dublin, well below that isogloss line. Heyho, well done Granny for impecable pronouncation! He also refers to her scones as “little miracles“, well done again Granny!

Scones, topweird

Finnegans

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The big important question is … are we happy?  At the moment there is the prospect of COVID vaccinations starting next week in Scotland. Fortunately, we are so old that we’re pretty near the front of the queue. Hurrah! There’s a flip side to the coin, however! Finnegans logoWe still cannot travel; we still can’t meet family and friends; we’re still leaving the EU at the end of the month and we still have a lunatic leading the free world. On top of all that we are being bombarded with Christmas adverts and music telling us life is perfect and that we should not only be happy but jolly happy. And it’s raining … argh! Okay, okay, in spite of all that we’ve made a decision. We are happy! And we hope that all our readers are too. A celebratory scone at Finnegans was called for.

internal view of Finnegans

Choices

This café is in the centre of Falkirk but the last time we were here was four years ago. Back then it was called Findlays. With the name change it presumably came under new management and normally, when this happens, we try and revisit to see if anything’s changed. Don’t know why it has taken us so long to revisit this one. Of course, we had to go through the, now commonplace and familiar palaver of wearing masks, giving our contact details and sanitising our hands.  But it has to be said that the staff, even with all these additional burdens,  couldn’t have been nicer or more helpful. We decided on some lunch followed by a scone to share. The choice was between plain and wheaten so, in the spirit of adventure, we went for wheaten … oooooh! 

A scone at FinnegansLunch was excellent and afterwards when our scone arrived it did look a little different. No crunchiness here, rather an overall firmness which was more bread-like than anything else. Nevertheless it was very enjoyable. And because it simply added to our already happy state we decided to award a topweird scone. Why not? 

Artwork at Finnegans
Interesting wall art at Finnegans
Surreal year

The only other Finnegan we know is the book Finnegans Wake by James Joyce. Not that we’ve read it or anything, it is devilishly difficult and far beyond our meagre intellects! Perhaps we should give it a go, however, because it supposedly attempts to recreate the experience of sleep and dreams … kind of like the somewhat surreal experience of 2020. As the year draws to a close it is tempting to reflect on all that has happened in the past twelve months. Then again, perhaps not! Just make up your mind to be happy … works for us!

FK1 1LL         tel: 01324 614050           Finnegans FB

///silks.tasty.soon

Scones, Top

Arnotdale House & Café

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If you were to hear someone talking about the “Grand Old Man Of The Pacific”, the town of Falkirk, here in Scotland, might not immediately spring to mind. However, Robert Dollar, was the said “Grand Old Man”, and he was Falkirk born and bred. A high school drop out, he starting off as an errand boy and ended up with a shipping empire that commanded trade all across the Pacific. His home in California was called “Falkirk” and his home in Falkirk was called Arnotdale. He didn’t actually live at Arnotdale, he just bought it in 1920 and bequeathed it to the people of the town. As you do if you are one of the richest men in the world. Now it’s called Arnotdale House & Café and it’s run by the Cyrenians, a charity that helps take care of homeless people.

No, we’re not homeless, that’s not why we’re here. Rather it was an invitation from friends to take afternoon tea with them.. What could be nicer? After all, the only thing nicer than afternoon tea is afternoon tea with good friends.

Secret of success

The extensive gardens now form Dollar Park, a wonderful leisure area appropriately named in memory of the town’s benefactor. Actually, I have a personal connection to Robert Dollar albeit a wee bit tenuous … okay, a big bit! In 1874, while deep in debt, Robert married a Miss Proudfoot to whom he attributed his entire success. Almost eighty years later, I was taught to play tennis in Dollar Park by none other than Miss Proudfoot … not the same one obviously though at the time, I do remember thinking she was quite old. Mind you, at that time I regarded anyone over fifteen years of age as quite old! Under Miss Proudfoot’s tutelage, I went on to became a very mediocre tennis player. So I can probably attribute my level of success to Miss Proudfoot as well. Told you it was tenuous!Internal view of Arnotdale House

Anyway enough of all that, what about the scones? We were fortunate to be seated in a large bay window with views over the beautiful gardens. Afternoon tea at Arnotdale HouseWithin minutes two three teir stands of goodies were placed on our table. There was quite a selection. Various quiches, sausage rolls and sandwiches on the bottom and cakes and chocolate dipped strawberries on the top. The scones, together with little pots of jam and cream, rightfully occupied a tier of their own in the middle. It was all rather splendid.

Readers will be aware that we don’t like large scones with our afternoon tea but, if anything, these ones might have been a tad on the small side. They were delicious though and considering everything else we had to eat the size of the scones turned out to be a blessing. We couldn’t finish everything. The lovely Cyrenian folks kindly boxed up everything we hadn’t eaten so that we could take it home. What’s not to like? Well done Arnotdale House & Café, topscone and many thanks to our friends for inviting us.

Lady leaders
The disaster that is the USofA just goes on and on. People dying left right and centre and seemingly no one in charge … unbelievable.
Statue of the Prodigal Son in Dollar Park
Statue in the park of the Prodigal Son
And the Donald sits fuming about the election with his finger on the nuclear button … scary! Mind you the UK is equally rudderless. We have a new Prime Minister but we just don’t know who it is yet. Now that Cummings and Cain have gone many think it’s Carrie Symonds, Boris’s live in lover. No bad thing perhaps. On recent performances there’s an argument to be made that all countries and political parties should have female leaders. Just not Margaret Thatcher … or Theresa May. And definitely not Priti Patel!
 
In spite of awarding coronavirus contracts worth £billions to their pals in government they are now spending another £40b in arms contracts. To developing technology to fight wars in space. This is in spite of most major security problems being pretty low tech. Mostly guys in flipflops blowing themselves up or running amok with a knife? There has to be a better way to spend that amount of money … puttin the Cyrenians out of business perhaps?
 
FK1 5SQ         tel: 01324 323331         Arnotdale House
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Scones, Top

Corner Café – Boxed

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Two years ago when we visited the Corner Café in our home town of Falkirk it was still a new enterprise … only two weeks old in fact. Fresh out of the box, so to speak! Now, the ever enterprising owner Andrew Harkins and his team, prompted by COVID restrictions, have taken it upon themselves  to supply afternoon tea in a box. Egh? So it’s perhaps appropriate that the title of this post is not Corner Café – Revisited, because we didn’t, but Corner Café – Boxed.

The logo at the Corner Café, Falkirk Afternoon tea in a box is a bit of an oxymoron, is it not? Surely, an item of such gentility and refinement cannot be placed in a box? A cardboard box to boot! However, given that we cannot travel anywhere, the next best thing to being out for afternoon tea in some splendiferous surroundings is to have it at home. But then you have to make it! Well, for the princely sum of £20 you can enjoy the simply pleasures of afternoon tea for two in your own home. And none of the bother of actually having to make it yourself. Brilliant! But what would it be like? We had to investigate!

Headlines

Bubbles at homeBack in 2018, when we first reported on this place, the main news was about a member of the Royal family closing her own car door. The media had got its knickers in a right Royal twist. Things have moved on since then with the offending Royal banished forever to America where such unseemly behaviour is deemed quite acceptable.

We also reported that the Ayrshire Ladies tug-of-war team had won the 500kg World Championship in Cape Town. The only news from Ayrshire this week was a bold headline in the Ayrshire Daily News “South Ayrshire Golf club owner loses 2020 presidential election“. In the past Trump has said that if he loses he will leave the US and move to Scotland. Noooo … Trump for President, Biden’s a cheat!!!” Seriously, we thought a glass of bubbles was appropriate to toast President Joe and add a touch of decadence to our afternoon tea in a box. Not absolutely necessary you understand but necessary enough … okay?

What’s in the box?

boxed afternoon teaAnyway, what about a box of afternoon tea? You do have to collect it from the Corner Café yourself but they provide it with a window so you get a hint of what’s inside!  First impressions? There’s plenty in there. We might struggle a bit. When we decanted the contents on to our admittedly small tiered afternoon tea plate there was not nearly enough room for everything. It would have to be a two stage affair.a boxed afternoon tea at home

The sandwiches, rolls and pies were all excellent. Now we were getting worried about having enough room for the four medium sized scones. We were right to worry. At the end of the day, conscience of having to leave some room for cakes, we only managed one and a half scones between us. We had given them a wee blast in the oven so they were nice and warm. Generous tubs of jam and clotted cream made them quite delicious. It did no harm that, like the Corner Café, our tea and coffee was supplied by Henry’s Coffee Company. Another topscone for the Corner Café.

Wandering minds

scones in a boxed afternoon teaIn the end we did little justice to the cakes and biscuits. They’ll keep ’til tomorrow! As we sat there in front of the fire, pleasantly bloated and  full of tea and bubbles our minds wandered to things we don’t understand. That’s a lot to contemplate! We thought getting older was supposed to bring greater understanding. Not so! Quite the opposite! Voting for Trump, voting for Boris, voting for Brexit, voting for Farage?? Thank goodness for afternoon tea. One of the few things left that we do understand.

Well done the Corner Café. The fact that you can get almost everything we understand into a relatively small box is truly amazing … or is it?

FK1 1LZ.     tel: 01324 410949        The Corner Café FB

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