Category Archives: Ordinary

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Ordinary, Scones

Rousay’s Cafe

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Today we are at Torwood Garden Centre just a couple of miles from home. Doggy afternoon tea at Rousay's CafeThey have a huge Blossoms Restaurant which we have visited several times. We hadn’t realised though that Blossoms had a separate dog coffee shop called Rousay’s Cafe. Rousay was the owner’s border terrier. You can get ‘pupcakes’. and even an afternoon tea. All made with dog friendly ingredients.

Now we would normally steer well clear of anywhere there are lots of dogs but on this occasion we could only see one. And it looked quite friendly. They also had scones so in the interests of diversity, inclusion and all that sort of stuff, we thought you might like us to review a dog cafe. Woof, our dedication knows no bounds!External view of Rousay's Cafe

Confusion

There was no afternoon tea on offer for mere humans so a sandwich for lunch followed by a scone was the order. The two lovely ladies behind the counter were desperately trying to operate in a space designed for one. There was much confusion … especially at the till. Eventually we got our sandwiches and they said they would bring our tea and coffee to the table. They did, but not until we were finished our lunch. No idea what was going on but neither, of course, did they. We wondered if we had sat up and begged with our tongues out would it have come quicker? It did arrive in time for our scone, however, so all was not lost. We were the only customers left by then, goodness knows what happens when they get busy.Internal view of Rousay's Cafe

Happy pooches

Our scone was surprising good. Not the crunchy exterior we normally like. It was sort of soft all over but rather pleasant nevertheless. It came with little pots of jam and cream. No topscone here. However, we know how daft people can get about their dogs so we’re sure they’ll really appreciate this place and will happily overlook deficiencies as long as their pooch is happy. Not for us though.

Internal view of Rousay's Cafe
Is this sort of place supposed to fill you with joy?
Disinvited

What is it with Boris? Just as we were pledging to stop carping on about him (it had become too easy) he goes and does it again! Defending the indefensible in his own party, loosing the place in a speech to the CBI and jabbering on about Peppa Pig World. Then getting the British delegation disinvited from the EU emergency talks on stopping immigrants crossing the Channel. Mind you, last year more people left the UK than came in so shortly we might be advertising for immigrants! Now he is belatedly introducing face masks again in England because of the the new Omicron variant … but not in hospitality? C’mon Boris, give us a break! There are plenty others we would like to criticise but you keep hogging all the really ludicrous stuff for yourself!

FK5 4EG         tel: 01324 553152         Rousay’s

///unstated.solving.roofs

Ordinary, Scones

Fat Jacks

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Here we are again visiting my elderly aunt in Callander. We’ve got a nerve, she’s not that much older than us. The last time we were in this cafe, however, was three years ago and back then it was called Applejacks. Now its undergone a minor name change to Fat Jacks. Don’t know what that’s all about because it still looks pretty much the same.

Looking north up Loch Lubnaig
Loch Lubnaig from the Cabin. My cousin used to say there was the wreck of a plane on the hill on the left but I never knew whether to believe him or not
Square sausage

Our reason for being out and about was actually to visit the Cabin at Loch Lubnaig. When we used to travel this road every weekend going to Glencoe this was just a little lay-by with a litter bin as the only facility.

The Cabin at Loch Lubnaig
the Cabin

A few years back this café was built but because we were always on our way to somewhere else we have never stopped to investigate. We also realised that we would never stop there unless we made it our destination. So that’s why we ended up here. Just our luck, best laid plans and all that, it turned out to be just a serving hatch. No sitting in but lots of seats outside … and no scones …. argh! Heyho, it was a lovely day. We got a coffee and shared a roll and square sausage. We’ve been together many years now so Pat has got used to extravagant fine dining! 

Looking north up Loch Lubnaig
we counted five hardy souls swimming in the loch and lots of paddle boarders

For a scone we had to backtrack to Callander, hence we ended up at Fat Jacks. Dedication or what? There were only cherry scones left so that simplified the decision making. A scone at Fat JacksThey had obviously been baked as a large round then cut up in a triangular shape, a bit like a pizza. No cream or jam though. The lady behind the counter explained that the owners were trying to sell the place so there wasn’t a large selection of anything. And it had that kind of feel about it. The scone had plenty cherries and was nice enough but without the usual accoutrements it was never going to be a topscone.

Hells angels

Not to worry, it was lovely sitting in the sunshine watching the good folks of Callander going about their business. The general peace and quiet, however, was somewhat rudely interrupted by a gang of Hells Angels roaring into town on their Harley Davidsons. They parked right beside us in Ancaster Square and we watched with interest to see what would happen next.  They took off their helmets and there wasn’t one of them below retirement age. Should have known … how else can you afford a Harley? They wandered off along the street … probably anxious to find a scone!

Progress ?

In our previous post from Applejacks you will doubtless remember us mentioning Scottish satirist James Thomson Callendar.

wind in Callander
This shop window might be better placed at Westminster

A couple of hundred years ago he published a book  rather nattily entitled  “The Political Progress of Britain or an Impartial History of Abuses in the Government of the British Empire in Europe, Asia and America since the Revolution in 1688 to the present time, the whole tending to prove the ruinous consequences of the popular system of Taxation, War and Conquest.” You’ve probably all read it by now but we wonder what he would have made of our progress since these days? Not much we suspect. Back then, however,  he was obliged to flee the country for daring to criticise the government. No sense of humour or just unable to face the truth … you decide.

FK17 8ED     tel: 01877 330370      Fat Jacks FB

///discussed.tungsten.marathon

Ordinary, Scones

Dunelm Coffee House

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This is a distressing tale of misconception misfortune. More than a little harrowing so readers of a delicate disposition should consider carefully whether to read further. It starts scarily by me going into a shop … something I haven’t done in a long time. I’ve found Jeff Bezos is perfectly capable of looking after all my worldly needs … except scones, of course. We were actually heading to Frankie and Benny’s for some lunch when we came on this sign as we passed the Dunelm homewares store which houses the Dunelm Coffee House.Sign at Dunelm

We don’t want you to think that we are cheapskates but a scone for £1 just cannot be ignored. As soon as you go in you are confronted by masses of stuff … everything from a needle to an anchor. Admittedly we didn’t ask for either but if we had, they would probably have directed us to the appropriate section. “Anchors are over there sir between the kettles and the made-to-measure curtains!”Internal view of Dunelm

Thawing out?

The cafe is on the first floor so up we went. We took our seats and Pat went to the self service counter to order some lunch and a scone to share. Sacre bleu, they had a big basket of scones but we were told they were all frozen and hadn’t thawed out … what? There was no choice but to simply settle for a ham and cheese toastie.Internal view of Dunelm

As we were finishing however I noticed a lady going past and what did she have … a scone! I called over to the girl behind the counter “how come we didn’t get a scone” to which she answered “because they weren’t ready but they are now“. It had to be done so Pat went up and waited in the queue again to get one. Turned out it was only the scone for £1, if you wanted jam and cream it was £2.70. Mon Dieu, is there no end?

A scone at DunelmWell no there wasn’t! They may have been ‘ready’ in somebody’s eyes but definitely not in ours. Okay it wasn’t frozen but it had just bearly got above zero degrees. Refreshing you might think on a hot day like this but no, it was just hard and cold. To top it all it came with cream from Cornwall and jam from Tiptree in Essex and you all know what we think of that. Told you it was harrowing. We did get a nice bath mat though! 

Pride

So the Council of Europe has found Britain to be the most unequal country in Europe with the highest poverty rates.lowest pensions and the least democracy. Wow, that’s not something to be proud of! All is not lost, however, Emma Raduncanu has just won the US tennis championship without dropping a single set in the entire tournament. Remarkable for anyone but for an 18 year old it’s quite astounding. She came through with nothing expected of her. Even she had her return flights to London booked two weeks before the final. We just hope she can withstand the media pressure she will find herself under in future championships. Adding the pressure of being virtually the only thing the UK can be proud of won’t help either. Good luck Emma.

FK1 1LW       tel: 01324 460020     Dunelm

Falkirk made K6s in Broadway, EssexThe Pedant has sent pictures of a couple of Falkirk made K6s in Broadway in Essex. Also some black K6s near Piccadilly Circus in London. Frozen scones and black telephone boxes  … the world has gone to pot!Black K6s near Piccadilly Circus

Ordinary, Scones

Tudor Coffee House

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In our previous post from Nithbank House we mentioned the extraordinary love between Lord and Lady Nithsdale. That was back in the 18th century but the place we are in today is dedicated to love. It’s their secret ingredient! We are at the Tudor Coffee House in Strathaven (pronounced Stray-ven).

External view of Tudor House Coffee Shop
Three metre long side on the side of the building
Love is all you need

They even give advice on how to achieve it. In 1362, Archibald the Grim became the first Baron of Strathaven. He did it through marriage to Joanna de Moravia. This is a small miracle in itself because, by all accounts, Archie was of unrefined stature and pot ugly. We can only think that he must have visited the Tudor Coffee House and took some lessons in the art of love. Pedantic readers need not write to point out problems with this timeline.Love poster

The cafe’s not very big so we decided to sit outside in the sunshine so that we could watch Strathaven in action. Internal view of Tudor House Coffee ShopWe’ve passed through the town before but never noticed how pretty it is. The large square in the centre is a car park now but it used to be common pasture and is still called ‘The Green’. The surrounding buildings are harled in a variety of colours that give it an overall pleasing effect in the sunshine. It used to have a thriving weaving industry but the number of passing tractors seemed to indicate something more agricultural these days. 

A scone at Tudor House Coffee ShopWe wanted a fruit scone but they only had plain left. The lovely girl who was looking after us offered to toast it and seemed, judging by the knowing wink, to think that was a good idea. Who were we to argue? Turned out to be sound advice because we thoroughly enjoyed it. Eventually though we thought it was just slightly short of a topscone … shame.

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Crash landing

Strathaven was also home during WWII to music hall and vaudeville hero, Sir Harry Lauder. He was responsible for such classics as Roamin’ in the Gloamin’ and Keep Right On To The End of The Road. Lots of love. At the same time Hitlers deputy Rudolf Hess was supposed to land his plane at the Duke of Hamilton’s residence, Dungavel House on the outskirts of Strathaven. At the time the Duke was thought to be a Nazi sympathiser. In foul weather he missed Dungavel and crash-landed in a farm a bit further north. That was the end of his freedom . He died, 46 years later, as the sole inmate of Spandau prison in Berlin.

Dungavel house is still there but now it’s an Immigration Removal Centre for folks awaiting deportation. Some of the poor sods floating across the English Channel in rubber dinghies will probably end up there. Not a lot of love. Maybe they should close Dungavel and use the Tudor Coffee House?

ML10 6AH.   tel: 01357 529487       Tudor Coffee

///fights.premiums.walks

Ordinary, Scones

Glenturret Lalique distillery

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It’s touching when people write and ask if we are still alive just because they haven’t received a scone post for a while. Apologies, we are okay but we have been a little distracted by other things recently. To kick things off again we thought that we should visit a special place, Glenturret Lalique distillery just outside Crieff. The crest at Glenturret Lalique distilleryWhen I was young my big brother and I used to get sent here every year for our holidays. Not to the distillery itself but to Distillery Cottage which was just a few yards along the road and the home off aunt Muriel. No idea why we were sent to stay with Muriel but maybe our parents just wanted rid of us for a few weeks … that’s a distinct possibility!

The swing

The little glen in which the distillery sits is idyllic and we had the freedom to explore far and wide … we regarded it, horizon to horizon, as our own. The sun always shone and our aunt used to make banana flip for pudding … bliss!  At that time the distillery was closed and was falling into disrepair. We used to play in it’s many abandoned buildings. There was a swing in one  and when James Fairlie bought the place in 1957, with a view to reopening it as a distillery, he asked us if he could take it down. Just think … if we had said “no”, none of this would have happened!Logo of Glenturret Lalique distillery

Anyway, the distillery has had many incarnations since then. The last one was the Famous Grouse Experience but now it has been taken over by Lalique the upmarket French glass manufacturers. Today I was here once again with my big brother who had invited myself and Pat for lunch.

Bar at Glenturret Lalique distillery
The bar

Things have changed! Our old swing has been replaced by a huge Lalique chandelier for one. Tempting though it was we did not try it out as a swing … we’re grown up now! Everything about the place screams ‘quality’ … they had even imported French waiting staff. Pat and I were very happy not to be paying the bill. such at GlenturretLunch consisted of haggis Scotch eggs, sea trout, Wagyu steaks, scallops and elaborate chocolate desserts … absolutely wonderful! 

Lounge at Glenturret Lalique distillery
the salon
Duty calls.

Remembering our scone duties, however, we asked if we could have tea and scones in the salon. I had heard they did a Glenturret sherry-soaked fruit scone … but it wasn’t to be, only ordinary fruit ones. A return visit for afternoon tea is now essential!

As might be expected the scones came beautifully presented with delightful little dishes of cream and homemade jam. My tea came in a lovely cup produced in Germany to Lalique’s design. It had a matt white finish but no handle. Oddly, it did not feel hot to pick up – dashed cunning those continental types.

A scone at Glenturret Lalique distillery

Design over substance

Now you would expect the scones to be top notch in a place like this, wouldn’t you? But they weren’t. Good, yes but not topscone material, plenty of fruit but just a wee bit on the solid side for our liking. Not to worry when we come back for our Glenturret sherry soaked scone we might get a better result … especially if we have a few of them!

World records

Towser the cat at Glenturret Lalique distilleryGlenturret Lalique distillery is not only famous for once housing our swing it was also home to Towser the Mouser. Towser holds the Guinness World record for killing mice, 28,899 to be precise. How did they work that out and are they absolutely sure it wasn’t 28,900? She lived all of her 24 years in the distillery and has a thoroughly well deserved bronze statue testifying to her considerable achievements. We could have played with Towser if she had been around in our time but she would have probably been too busy!

This visit was a special treat from my big brother and it was very special. Hope the wallet didn’t protest too much. Pat even bought me a bottle of Glenturret sherry cask whisky. She could have got it in a Lalique bottle but she’s too Scottish for that sort of nonsense. Should I try soaking a scone in it?

Borders

At last the US and UK are leaving Afghanistan … should never have been there in the first place. Inexcusable for Britain which has a centuries old disastrous history in the region. On the way home from Crieff we noticed swallows lined up on the telephone wires getting ready to fly back to South Africa after the summer. They will be replaced by thousands of geese coming here from Siberia and Greenland. With the current woeful situation in Afghanistan it occurred to us that borders have a lot to answer for.

PH7 4HA        tel: 01764 656565        Glenturret Lalique

///epic.impose.extremely

 

Ordinary, Scones

The Fish Man

Logo on the fish man's vanIt’s come to this … we’re getting our scones delivered. Of course, there’s more to it than that! We didn’t deliberately seek out scone deliveries, it just kind of happened. For many years now Scott McSharry, the Fish Man,  has been parking his van outside our house on a Wednesday evening and hooting his horn. The horn has  a magical effect on the neighbourhood. Suddenly, from no-one being around,  there are loads of people emerging from their homes and all heading in the same direction. Scott’s a bit like the pied piper except this is Falkirk not Hamelin!Logo on the fish man's van

It wasn’t always like this. Scott used to have a wee van and he sold fish from Pittenweem … maybe some eggs if you were lucky. Recently, however, he acquired a much bigger van and now you can get  bread, cakes, tomatoes, strawberries, eggs …. and, would you believe it … scones. All his produce is wonderful so we thought his scones would be worth a try as well.

 

Scones to your door

A scone from the fish manWe ate ours in the garden in the sunshine  with a bowl of whipped cream and some of Pat’s crab apple jelly. What wasn’t to like? Nothing as it turned out. The scones were a tad on the large side for our liking. They tasted good and that’s what matters at the end of the day. Most of our readers are unlikely to be able to use the Fish Man’s services and, of course, they were not exactly ‘presented’ so no topscone. Nevertheless, useful to know that you can always get a scone even though you can’t be bothered baking or going out.

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Pingdemic

With most of the COVID restrictions being lifted we can go anywhere though, in Scotland, the wearing of masks is still required. In England, so called Freedom Day (July 19) has come and gone. No restrictions, just recommendations. This joyous occasion, however, has been anything but. Just when everyone should be able to go about their business ‘normally’ we have had a rise in cases resulting in a pingdemic. Hundreds of thousand have been pinged by the ‘track & trace’ app and forced into ten days of isolation.  Schools may as well close. Supermarket shelves are bare because there’s no-one to deliver the stuff or put it on the shelves. Complete chaos!Logo on the fish man's van

We have also learned from the PM’s old boss Dominic Cummings that Boris doesn’t actually believe in pandemics.  When he was pinged he refused to isolate. Now he is being forced to isolate in Chequers, wee soul. Everyone knows that Boris is a muppet. However, you would think that even with muppets there would be some sort of learning process. Logo on the fish man's vanNot with Boris! While people like Scott do their utmost to keep  their customers happy by diversifying from fish into scones, Boris seems to just get dafter and dafter.A good slap with a wet fish might bring him to his senses! Large wet fish please Scott!

No fixed abode          tel: 07743 861391              Scott’s Fresh Fish FB

Ordinary, Scones

The Old Mill Café

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Pat was making her first batch of strawberry jam when we got pinged by our Bathurst correspondents. They have been continuing their scone adventures in New South Wales.  

In their own words:

We went for a drive last Sunday to Millthorpe, a small town about 40 km west of us in Bathurst. Normally, on a Sunday it would be choker-block with weekend trippers from Sydney, but with the Greater Sydney lockdown, it was nearly deserted.  We managed to get a seat in The Old Mill. 

A scone at the Old Mill Café, MillthorpeSo, of course, we ordered a scone.  They looked pretty good in the glass cabinet, and also on the plate when our serving arrived. Quite large, nicely golden brown on top, our mouths watered.

But…….the scones tended to disintegrate as we tried to cut them up, lots of crumbs, nothing you could spread the jam and cream on.  On the plus side however, the strawberry jam was delicious, homemade with whole strawberries. On the minus side, it looked like the cream came out of one of those squirty bottle thingies.

Ah well, it does you good to get out occasionally!

Unspreadable scones are unforgivable but it does serve to show the travails of being a dedicated sconey, no matter what country you are in. Logo of the Old Mill Café, Millthorpe

Millthorpe was originally called Spring Grove when it was first set up by a convict overseer in 1834. It wasn’t until 1884 with the building of a flour mill that the community, by a very narrow margin, voted to change the name. Aw well, we liked Spring Grove. We should have been there, maybe we could have swung the vote. 

Democracy

Anyway that’s democracy! The House of Commons Library Research Group has just found that Scotland gets a very poor deal as a result of being part of the UK. They found that Scotland would be much better off as part of the EU group of small nations. Heyho,  tell us something we didn’t already know. We wish we have democracy in the UK it would make such a difference. But, of course, it doesn’t make an iota of difference what Scotland votes for .. on anything!. We have also discovered that the BBC is now only spending a measly 51% of the fees raised in Scotland in Scotland. Oh gosh, we thought that the diabolical poor service provided by the BBC meant that they were spending loads of money here. Don’t tell us it’s all getting spent in England!?

Only hours to go before the Euro Finals where England are playing Italy. If you didn’t realise that you must have been living on the moon for the past month. Again, we are constantly told that the entire country (meaning UK) is behind the England team. What country is that then? The media don’t seem to realise that the UK is not a  country, or a nation for that matter. It’s a collection of countries but unfortunately it is run by a a group who, in former times, would have undoubtedly been exported to Australia. We wish England well but are dreading them winning and having to face another twenty years of nonsensical idiotic jingoism and punditry. The Queen wishes them well though she probably thinks it’s the England croquet team.External view of the Old Mill Café, Millthorpe

Pat’s strawberry jam was a resounding success. Now she is pickling them as well. Pickled strawberries, who would have thought? Nice on our nasturtium salads.

Many thanks, once again, to our ever faithful correspondents, what would we do without you?

NSW 2798       tel: +61 2 6366 3188         Old Mill

///pocketbook.wiping.nastily

Ordinary, Scones

The Village Café in Ceres

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In 1068, Scotland’s only Royal Saint, Queen Margaret was fleeing to Europe to escape England’s William the Conquerer. She didn’t reckon, however, on her ship being blown off course and landing in Scotland. She probably didn’t reckon on marrying the King of Scotland, Malcolm Canmore, as a result. Having eight children by him, three of which became Kings probably didn’t enter her head either. Not many women give birth to a King, never mind three! But she did! Funny how life can be dictated by totally random events.

Pilgrimage

Margaret, was a good soul, however and, when she wasn’t propagating Kings, was concerned about the difficulties pilgrims encountered trying to get from Edinburgh to St Andrew’s Abbey. to be close to Andrew’s saintly bones.

Message card in Ceres
Notice in Ceres on the pilgrims way

She decided that there should be ferry service established across the river Forth to short circuit an otherwise long and tortuous journey of four to five days. It wouldn’t have entered her head that ten centuries later there would be a railway bridge and two road bridges in exactly the same spot as her ferry. The only thing missing nowadays is the pilgrims but back then they would have been extremely grateful to reach Ceres. The last stopover before the final seven miles to St Andrews itself where they could see the holy relics. There seems to bits of St Andrew scattered all over the world so he must have been a big guy and had twice as many bones as anyone else.  We are here as well but at the Village Cafe in Ceres for the scones … a kind of pilgrimage!

Community in action

Actually, we just stopped off in the village because it’s rather beautiful and olde-worldy. Ceres (pronounced ‘series’) has a lovely village green and also hosts the oldest Highland games in Scotland. They’ve been held every year since 1314. When we came on the Village Cafe, of course, we had to visit. What a place! Internal view of the Village Cafe in CeresTiny and nothing fancy but run entirely by the community. There were some very cheery ladies inside who welcomed us like long lost friends. A lovely day so we sat outside and watched the tractors going to and fro. Some of them are gigantic compared to the tractors we used to know as children.

A scone at the Village Cafe in CeresAnyway we were soon sorted with a scone and some tea. All the while we could listen to the happy banter between the ladies and the locals going on inside. When we asked if one of them had baked the scones they said they hadn’t but offered to take us down the street and show us the house of the lady who had? It was that kind of place. We declined and concentrated on our scone. It would have been great if had been a topscone but sadly it just fell short. Never mind we thoroughly enjoyed our visit.

Money down the chute 

Later, we were strolling round the village when we came on a wall with plants for sale at the Parish Church. There was a sign saying “Please place money in chute opposite“. Sure enough on the other side of the road there was a chute (a 4” drainage pipe) which dropped about 15 feet into a flower pot in the garden below. We bought a nepeta plant for 50p. Not because we wanted one, we just wanted to put some money going down the chute.Plants for sale in Ceres

What’s in the news? Nothing … except vastly overpaid football pundits spouting complete nonsense about the England vs Germany game later today. All other news has been cancelled … it could make you weep!

Helpful hint

Did you know that if you place a cross in the shape of the St Andrews cross (that’s an X) on your fire surround it stops witches coming down your chimney? It’s okay, don’t mention it 

KY15 5NA.       tel: 01334 828560        Village Cafe FB

///graph.giggled.rally

ps The Pedant has been in Kineton in Warwickshire and sent this picture of a K6 telephone box. Unfortunately he couldn’t access the manufacturer’s plate on the back because of nettles. Goodness, you just can’t get correspondents prepared to go that extra mile these days! K6 telephone ox in Kineton Warwickshire

 

Ordinary, Scones

Fernie Castle

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Fernie Castle has been around since the middle of the 14th century and has had a pretty chequered history through the years. In 1715 it was even forfeited for its support of Bonnie Prince Charlie in the Jacobite Rebellion. Since 1960, however, it has been a hotel and we’re here for afternoon tea.External view of Fernie Castle

First impressions are impressive. A beautiful building surrounded by acres of beautiful grounds. What’s not to like? Well, the owner for a start. In his tartan trews and coiffured accent he bore all the hallmarks of someone who could barely stand the fact that he had to admit riff riff like us into his stately abode. We had just come from another stay at Rufflets (the subject of a previous post) so we knew what a good hotel looks like. Fernie didn’t look like one! There were all sorts of things wrong … understaffed and just a bit grubby for starters. What would our afternoon tea be like?

Broken teeth

We didn’t have long to wait. It was plonked in front of us along with our tea and bubbles. Afternoon tea at Fernie CastleThe sandwiches were actually quite good but the scones tasted like they been freshly baked for the Bonnie Prince back in 1745. More akin to a museum exhibit rather than something we were supposed to eat. Between us we ate half of one scone and none of the rather sweaty looking cakes. In our time, as you know, we have eaten some pretty dodgy scones but these ones took the biscuit. We could have broken our teeth on them! This was as far away from a topscone as it’s possible to get.

Not a clue

Presumably all the original artworks had been sold off over time and they had been replaced with rather shoddy looking replacements. Everything just looked  tired. As if it was being run by someone who had neither the money or the ability to run a successful hotel. Pity, because it’s a great place with loads of potential. Dining room at Fernie Castle

The Green Lady

No castle worth its salt would be without its own ghost and Fernie Castle is no exception.  A young girl whose father disapproved of her lover saught refuge in the west tower. She fell from a top floor window to her death. Her ghost, known as the ‘Green Lady’ has been seen wandering through the bedrooms. We think, however, that she had just partaken of an afternoon tea and had simply lost the will to live.

an atmospheric bar at Fernie
The Keep Bar
The curse

In the nearby village of Letham there have been several sightings of a “big black cat”. Not your ordinary overfed domestic moggie but a full sized panther type creature. They are supposed to be lucky but in some parts of the world a black cat walking across in front of you is deemed unlucky. Never mind, you can reverse the curse.  First walk in a circle, then walk backwards across the place it happened, count to 13 and chant a charm or line from the Bible. That should do the trick! See, you thought this blog was just about trivia and scones, you never realised it had useful stuff as well.

Curses curses!

Oh dear, our beloved Secretary of State for Health and Social Care (who would have his job), Matt Hancock, has fallen foul of that age old curse, the office romance. He’s a bit of an Adonis after all? And he seems to have fallen for millionaire mum, Gina Coladangelo thus displaying to same judgement he has exercised during COVID. His job might be on a shaky peg but Boris, given his record, would have a bit a nerve sacking someone for such a dalliance. 

KY15 7RU.      tel: 01337 810 381               Fernie

Ordinary, Scones

Fisher & Donaldson

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Have you heard of Jeddart Justice? Originating in the border town of Jedburgh it’s where someone is hanged first, and tried afterwards.

Pastries at Fisher & Donaldson
F&D pastries

 Well apparently the good folk of Cupar in Fife once accidentally drowned a man who refused to leave his cell. Rather than cheat him out of a trial they put his body on the stand anyway. Don’t know if he was found guilty or not. We think Boris would love to dish out Jeddart Justice to a host of people but it would probably be frowned upon these days. Anyway, we are in Cupar today, not looking for justice of any kind … just a scone. Fisher & Donaldson seemed like a likely spot.

It’s that time of year! When driving up to Cupar the fields were as green as green could be … almost impossibly green. Green and gold fieldsApart, of course, from the rape fields which were solid swathes of that impossible chrome yellow. Everything looked wonderfully fresh and vibrant.

In case of confusion

The town of Cupar in Fife should not be confused with that well known song “The Wee Cooper of Fife”.  Everyone knows the words.  

There was a wee cooper who lived in Fife
Nickety, nockety, noo, noo, noo

At first this doesn’t seem to make any sense however everything becomes clear with the next few lines:

And he ha’ gotten a gentle wife
Hey Willie Wallacky, hey John Dougall
Alane quo rushety, roo, roo, roo.

A poster at Fisher & Donaldson

No messing

Fisher & Donaldson are not exactly new kids on the block. Their bakery has been supplying the local area for over 100 years. It has a very traditional atmosphere and layout though the compartmentalised layout is mainly due to COVID restrictions. Internal view of Fisher & DonaldsonWhen we asked for scones the lady serving us, who had the demeanour of someone who had been closely related to the chap in the flooded cell, wasn’t sure if there were any left. After checking she said there were two, one cheese and one cherry. Fine that was all we wanted. When we asked for cream it prompted a very straight faced reply “No … we don’t do that sort of thing!” Okay, we were only asking!

A scone at Fisher & DonaldsonWhen they arrived they actually looked rather promising. Pat’s cheese one was good and my cherry one was also very acceptable. All in all everything was fine but no topscones here today … not with that po faced attitude to an innocent cream request. We actually spoke to the lady when we were paying our bill and she turned out to be quite good fun. We must have just caught her in a moment when she was thinking of her drowning relative.

Hickory shafts

We used to go on holiday with the children to Hill of Tarvit in Cupar and had great fun. However, at that time I hadn’t realised that the local Kingarrock nine-hole golf course (founded in 1855) still used hickory shafted clubs. All my clubs have hickory shafts … that’s all there was available when I bought them? My golfing career was very short lived and although everyone laughed at my clubs I certainly could not blame them for my performances.

KY15 5JT        tel: 01334 652551         Fisher and Donaldson

///fortnight.focal.neon

You will remember in our last post from Rufflets we visited our Bathurst correspondents family who lived nearby. Well simultaneously we received a note from our correspondents  saying they had revisited the Cafe Zestt  in Crookwell and were less than impressed … scone arrived 10 minutes after their coffee was finished … unforgivable! More interestingly perhaps they also visited the Scottish Arms Hotel in Bowral and as well as all the usual Scottish paraphanlia there was a K6 telephone box …. made in Falkirk. It had a sort of old-fashioned handset inside, possibly a direct line to Boris, or more likely Nicola. Don’t think Boris would have answered, he is totally preoccupied with sausage wars!

Bowral K6 telephone box

Birthday girl

Remember I had a birthday girl on my hands at Rufflets. Well that was a few days before her actual birthday. On the big day itself friends invited us round to their place for afternoon tea. What a fabulous afternoon that turned out to be.
We sat down in their garden at 2.30 and were still there at 8.30 … that’s how good it was. Home baked scones were the highlight though I was told in no uncertain terms that they were not to be critiqued under any circumstances. But they were definitely topscones  so it’s impossible not to.

One of our granddaughters joined us for a time and just as she did so a tooth that had been threatening to come out for days, fell out. More business for the tooth fairy!She knows how to keep her granny happy though. Many thanks L&R for a fabulous afternoon … and evening!