All posts by billpaterson1@me.com

Ordinary

Mannerstons Café

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Mannerstons Café had only been open about two months when we popped in on our way to Hopetoun House. Perhaps because of that it looked a bit new and uninspiring from the outside .. but inside it was buzzing. It has a shop with all the usual ‘country store’ stuff, eggs, jam, vegetables, wine and beer. They also do their own ice cream. Already it has a achieved a 4.5 overall score from TripAdvisor. Internal view of Mannerstons Farm Shop Café

Cream tea

The café area is large and it has an outside sitting area for when the weather is suitable. We ordered a cream tea for two but we could have had any amount of other things. If they have a selection of different teas we certainly were not offered any. However, as it happens the tea we got was good.

Scones at Mannerstons Farm Shop CaféThe scones were homebaked and very good. Sort of crunchy on the outside and soft and light in the middle and with lots of jam and cream to go with them. There may be one or two minor teething problems (no website to speak of) but if Mannerstons continues in this vain it will be very popular.

Family silver

Not so popular is this ideologically driven government that only 37% voted for imposing massive cuts on the poor and selling off the family silver (Royal Mail, RBS) to their buddies in the City .. because they can! Who actually voted for this?

EH49 7LY       tel: 01506 834949           Mannerstons

Ordinary, Scones

The Tyndrum Inn

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Tyndrum is probably most famous for gold mining and the Green Welly Stop. At a fork in the road, it is always busy with traffic either heading west to Oban or north to Fort William. The West Highland Way provides a steady stream of walkers all year round. The Tyndrum Inn sits along side the Green Welly and provides accommodation as well as all the usual things you would expect from a small hotel.

We found it a little odd from many points of view. It did not look like a self-service kind of place .. but it was. You ordered your scone at the bar and then took your seat wherever that happened to be. As things, like your scone, appeared on the bar you had to go and collect it. The same for your tea or coffee. The order did not appear in one go so several trips were involved just to get a scone and some coffee .. odd. We are sure it would have been just as quick to bring it to the table as dump it on the end of the bar. IMG_8254

That said our home-baked scone was actually quite good. However the Inn in general looked as if was in need of some serious investment. Until that happens we will not be rushing back.

Serious investment is also needed in the Scotland Bill which gets its second reading today at Westminster. The Smith Commission proposals are way too little. If they try to force it through they might as well give up on the Union. Scotland voted for something else completely. Would they be that stupid? Think they might be. Fluffy Mundell has just announced a £170m cut in the previously agreed Scottish budget. Tories in Scotland seem to be on some sort of suicide mission.

FK20 8RY       tel:01838 400219        Tyndrum Inn

island, Ordinary, Scones

Liosbeag Café

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We took the car ferry from Oban to Achnacroish in order to right a wrong. We had never before visited Lismore. We had looked at it many times from Mull and Appin and various other places but had never actually set foot on it. This was to be our first time .. exciting. External view of Liosbeag Café, Isle of LismoreWe were guests at Bachuil Country House but before we arrived there we came on the Liosbeag Café at the local Gaelic Heritage Centre. It was just about scone time. As it turns out there is one Kiki McColl who is manager and responsible for all the baking here. She doesn’t scrimp! A scone at Liosbeag Café, Isle of LismoreThe cakes and scones all came in what might be termed ‘man-sized’ portions. Kiki’s raspberry scones looked huge to begin with but when they appeared complete with jam and cream they were indeed, something to behold. A scone at Liosbeag Café, Isle of Lismore

All we can say is if you are ever on Lismore you must have one of these Kiki masterpieces. You won’t need much else for the rest of the day. If you fancied something else however there is a whole range of other food on offer, a shop, and a history centre. Well worth a visit. Considering it is the only café on the island it is just as well that it’s good one. Well done to Kiki and the girls for the friendly welcome and excellent food. We would love to come back!

PA34 5UL          tel: 01631 760020        Liosbeag Café

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

IKEA Edinburgh

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No it wasn’t flat packed and no we did not even need an allan key. The scones at IKEA Edinburgh come in much the same way as any other.A scone at IKEA Edinburgh We had arrived here with an IKEA virgin. Honestly we thought that everyone in the world had been here at some point in their lives .. if not every weekend. It was great to see it through fresh eyes so to speak. You have got to hand it to them, they think of just about everything.

After  the IKEA journey (follow the arrows) it is perhaps just as well that they have a watering hole at the end of the trail because. By that time, it is very welcome if not absolutely necessary. Internal view of IKEA EdinburghIn true IKEA style there are no frills. Self service, follow the arrows, pour your own coffee/tea (as much as you like). Because of all that .. very reasonable prices. Our scone had surprisingly light texture and, all things considered, was rather good.

Solitary Tory

A) the Queen’s speech managed, better than any other single event, to demonstrate how out of touch and incongruous the Westminster establishment has become. As someone said “a woman in a £1m hat delivers speech on austerity“. B) the draft Scotland Bill has seen the light of day and surprise surprise it outlines some totally inadequate powers for Scotland. They can only be used if the Scottish Government seeks permission from the single Tory MP in Scotland. C) the LibDems sought to defend the dishonesty of their single Scottish Rt Honourable member by saying that all MP’s lie. You could not make it up. Something has got to change!

EH20 9PW          tel: 020 3645 0000           IKEA Edinburgh

Ordinary, Scones

Patisserie Valerie

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Patisserie Valerie is a well known chain of over 300 outlets around the UK but it all originated back in Soho in 1926. That’s  when Madame Valerie came to London from Belgium to educate the English in continental patisserie. Now she is tackling the Scots. This particular one was in Rose Street, Edinburgh but we could have easily gone to any of the other three in the city centre. They would probably all be much of a muchness. Internal view at Patisserie Valerie, EdinburghChains tend to have a recipe that they stick to (for very good reasons) wherever they set up shop. The speciality is cakes and their window display can be fairly difficult to walk past without feeling a certain ‘pull’.

Mango Tango

Since they serve afternoon tea throughout the day and you don’t have to book in advance we thought we would just walk in and give it a whirl. And it really was as easy as that even though it was early evening. Wicktoria (spelt correctly) provided excellent service though she confessed to never having tried the Mango Tango tea that I ordered. Pat had the traditional breakfast tea but when she tasted mine she was almost tempted to change, it was very refreshing.

Everything was pretty much as you would expect, a selection of sandwiches and quiche on the lower layer, scones in the middle and cakes on top. Afternoon tea at Patisserie Valerie, EdinburghUnfortunately the only problem was the scones. Two fruit and two plain, they looked good and they were warm. That was nice, however we suspect they had been heated in a microwave and that seldom provides any enhancement to a scone. All in all they were pretty solid and unappetising. Pity really because everything else was okay and not too expensive.

Single eggs

Everything is relative however. Whilst £25 for two people is not too expensive for some, for others it would be totally out of reach. Sad to read that shops in Paisley are selling single eggs for people who cannot afford more. A scandalous indictment for one of the richest nations on earth.

EH2 3JD         tel: 0131 220 1336          Patisserie Valerie

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

Edinburgh Filmhouse

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Now we know that if you are looking for a scone you would not immediately rush off to the cinema. Popcorn yes, ice cream yes, but not scones. However if you were at the pictures and there was a scone right in front of you, just begging to be eaten, then you might be tempted. Interior view at the Edinburgh Filmhouse

Force Majeure

That’s how it was for us when we went to the Edinburgh Filmhouse and ended up in their well appointed café area. You can get anything from a full blown meal to a pint of beer and a sandwich. There seemed to be only a single scone left. It seemed only right that we put it out of its misery. It would provide us with some sustenance for the film ahead. A scone at the Edinburgh Filmhouse

Presentation was what you might typically expect from a self-service place. Scone expectations were not exactly soaring. We were pleasantly surprised however when it turned out to be not at all bad. Quite good in fact, nice texture and quite light. The film , Force Majeure, was a Swedish production with subtitles and we did not have high expectations for that either but it seemed like the best of what was on offer. It was excellent. Based round a family skiing trip it laid bare the stresses and strains involved in close family relationships in an intriguing and very honest way.

Feeling fairly uplifted when we came out we were rudely brought back down again by the discovery that the former Secretary of State for Scotland had fessed up to being personally responsible for the ‘Frenchgate‘ scandal. A scandal that could have altered the whole course of the General Election in Scotland … unbelievable! If he had come clean before the election he would not have won his seat. There would be no LibDem representation in Scotland at all. Now the question is how can he hold on to it when it was obviously gained through rank dishonesty? It has also cost the taxpayer £1.4m to get to the truth.

Wheesht

More refreshingly perhaps, earlier in the week, the Presiding Officer (Speaker) in the Scottish Parliament had to resort to ‘wheesht’ instead of the usual ‘order, order’ to maintain a modicum of decorum in the debating chamber. And it worked! Anyway we can recommend Force Majeure and the Edinburgh Filmhouse scone if you find yourself so inclined.

EH3 9BZ           tel: 0131 228 2688       Edinburgh Filmhouse

Ordinary

Café Circa Doune

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Wondering what to do when the rain is thrashing it down outside but you just want to ‘get out’? You could do a lot worse than a visit to  the Scottish Antique and Arts Centre on the outskirts of Doune. If you like a good rummage it will take quite a few hours to do the whole place justice. There are lots of different stands offering literally everything from a needle to an anchor. Thirsty work of course so it is just as well that there is a nice cafe area called Café Circa. A scone at Cafe Circa Doune at Scottish Antique and Arts Centre

We ordered the obligatory scone and when it arrived our appetites were whetted by the presentation. Nice cups, cream in a fine china teacup, jam and butter in little pots, everything sprinkled with icing sugar. What’s not to like? Well, the scones actually. They were home baked but for some reason they just tasted like something was missing. Maybe it was salt because they seemed more like bread than scones. The baking had also been a bit overdone with the base especially being very hard and crunchy. The cream was scooshie, which is never a great option. Whatever the missing ingredient is, we hope they find it soon because otherwise this is a good place to visit.

There seems to be something missing in the North of England as well with over 12,000 (73%) people surveyed in the Liverpool Echo wanting to join Scotland in the event of it ever becoming independent. Can it be that what they are missing is a voice? The times just get stranger and stranger!

FK16 6HG           tel: 01786 841683              Cafe Circa

self-service

Falkirk Wheel Café

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Nowadays, although it is not that long ago, it is quite difficult to think back to the millennium and all that was going on at that time. Remember the millennium bug that was going to throw every computer and hence the world into chaos at the stroke of midnight? In central Scotland the big project was the rejuvenation and rejoining of the Union canal and the Forth & Clyde canal. Both had lain derelict and unloved for many many years. At one time the canals had been joined by a series of locks but they had long since disappeared so the answer was to build the Falkirk Wheel to raise boats from the lower Forth &Clyde canal into the Union and vice versa.External view at the Falkirk Wheel Café

The result was a spectacular feat of engineering which has successfully put Falkirk, for the first time ever, on the tourist map. It seems to be continually busy with people from all over the world just coming to look at how it works. Or taking boat trips to actually experience it for themselves. Catering for this influx of visitors is the ubiquitous visitor centre with the usual gift shop and cafe area. The gift shop has all the stuff which you would find in any shop aimed directly at tourists. We always find this disappointing and slightly irritating because tourists to Scotland must find almost exactly the same choice of goods whether they are. At Falkirk Wheel or Culloden battlefield or Edinburgh Castle. Kind of the same way as the Queen must find that the world smells of fresh paint.

Internal view at the Falkirk Wheel CaféThe café here is confusing and disappointing. Difficult to figure out the system and, when you do, it just screams of inefficiency. That said they do have a reasonable range of stuff on offer. However, it is set up pretty much like a school canteen, a bit cold and clinical. The service is a bit like that as well, nobody seems to be enjoying working there. It probably suffers in the same way as all places that don’t actually have to attract customers in their own right. The customers arrive to see the Wheel and there’s nowhere else to go for something to eat or drink. A kind of monopoly situation.

We bought some lunch but because they had banana and chocolate chip scones we thought that, being dedicated sconeys, we had to try them as well. A scone at the Falkirk Wheel CaféThey were okay, quite good texture and definitely tasted .. you’ve guessed it, of banana and chocolate. Fine as a novelty scone but definitely not going to displace the traditional ones. Just call us old fashioned.

Democracy?

Apart from the Wheel itself, this was a disappointing experience. We brought some friends from England along who had never been to Falkirk before and had hoped for better. Also hoping for better as the election dust settles and Westminster gets back to work. It does make you wonder about the state of democracy in the UK. 85% of Scotland, 73% of Wales and 58% of England didn’t vote for the Tories but got them anyway. An outright Tory government threatening to do away with our human rights. Scotland even gets a Secretary of State to speak on its behalf, chosen from a shortlist of one. The one Scottish Conservative MP? There must be a better system!

Ordinary, Scones

JamJar Café

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Bridge of Allan is the kind of Belgravia of central Scotland. A favourite hangout for the well off to live and play so there are lots of hotels, cafés, bars etc. Today we decided to stop off at the JamJar Café.  A nice day though not quite warm enough to sit outside on their pavement patio area. Inside though it is toasty no matter what the weather. A couple of big log burning stoves blazing away all day. It has the atmosphere of a well run but relaxed bistro and you can get pretty much anything you want from Sunday lunch to a snack. Internal view at the Jamjar Café, Bridge of Allan

Needless to say we were after the scones so I got my usual fruit one and Pat got a savoury cheese one. Since our last post, of course, the election has come and gone .. and what an election. The media are having a field day trying to figure out what happened with the loss of three party leaders within as many hours. Scotland, typically some might say, has gone off on its own in a direction almost diametrically opposed to England. It managed to get PoshDave returned with an overall majority thus proving that polls are not worth the paper they are written on.

Again typically, Scotland seems to be getting blamed for all the ensuing problems. Bringing down Labour , bringing down LibDems and, for all I know, bringing down UKIP. Though I’m not sure that could actually be classified as a problem. NastyNige bleating on about his 4 million votes being worth only one seat whereas the SNP’s 1.5 million  votes gets them 56 seats. Of course, conveniently forgetting that the SNP only stood in 59 seats compared to over 600 for UKIP.

Statistics

However, the most interesting statistic to emerge was the one that determined that if every single voter in Scotland had voted Labour (or any other party) it would not have made the slightest difference to the result. That for me encapsulates ‘the Scottish problem’. When it comes to voting, Scotland may as well not bother. Except maybe this time with virtually the whole country turning yellow, it might be different. Emphasis on ‘might’.

Anyway PoshDave and his classmates can pretty well do as they want now but I suspect that most of England will not be happy with the results. That, along with the EU, the Union, and him being unpopular within his own party, may turn out to be the least of his problems. “He’s gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside his sole” as Christina Perri would say. A scone at the Jamjar Café, Bridge of AllanIt will be fascinating to see how it all pans out.

Meanwhile the scones in the JamJar Café were consumed with varying degrees of indifference. Pat didn’t finish her cheese one and although I finished both of mine (I got two because they said that they were a little bit small but they probably just wanted rid of them) it was only because I was peckish. They did not seem fresh and certainly not produced on the day.

Daughters of Bridge of Allan

Everything else looks good in the JamJar, and it’s busy so they are obviously not depending on their scones. On the plus side log burning stoves are great. The service was efficient if not overly friendly. The daughters of Bridge of Allan are probably forced to work here so they can experience ‘the real world’. No passwords for the wifi, it is just there, brill! So why is the website so useless?

FK9 4HR      tel: 01786 831616      www.jamjarcafe.co.uk

Scones, Top

Roman Camp Country Hotel

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It is perhaps fitting that with just one day left before polling starts in the General Election that we find ourselves on the edge of the Roman Empire. Here in Callander the Roman Camp Country Hotel reminds us of the fact that this was about as far as the Romans got before they gave up with troublesome Scots. From here they retreated south where things were easier to manage. Like the Romans many UK unionist politicians are currently wondering if they should do the same. The conservatives may do better than predicted and if they manage to retain power I will have to concur with Aneurin Bevan when he asked. “How can wealth persuade poverty to use its political freedom to keep wealth in power?”

Sycophants and flatterers

Anyway this close to polling it would seem unlikely that a scone blog will change the outcome substantially.  However, another recent and troubling phenomena has been the arrival of a Royal baby. Internal view at the Roman Camp Hotel in Callander Very nice and all that, but the near hysteria it has created is worrying. 120 years ago, when King Edward VIII was born, Keir Hardie said “From childhood onwards this boy will be surrounded by sycophants and flatterers and will be taught to believe himself as of a superior creation”. I fear the same fate awaits baby Charlotte .. and her big brother.

Sitting, cocooned by a roaring fire in one of the Roman Camp’s sumptuous sitting rooms you could easily forget about all such matters and just sit back and watch the rain thrashing down outside. This is a lovely place and they boast quite openly, and as it happens quite justifiably, about their afternoon teas. Afternoon tea at the Roman Camp Hotel in CallanderThey serve it slightly differently … in courses. Most places serve everything at once so this was a welcome variation.

Our first course was a Haggis Bon Bon. Sounds unlikely but it was delicious. Second course was all the savouries. A range of sandwiches, sausage rolls, quiche, gougére .. delicious. The sweet stuff followed in the third course. Cupcakes, panna cotta, drizzle cake, tiffin, meringues .. delicious. All done at a very leisurely and relaxed pace over a couple of hours with as much tea or coffee as you wanted.

How to start the day

The scones were perfect, light and fluffy, and definitely get ‘topscone’ status, no problem. There was both fruit and a plain each accompanied by plenty jam and cream. A scone at the Roman Camp Hotel in CallanderThe fruit one was packed full of goodies and was particularly yummy. All in all this was a wonderful experience and, given half a chance, we would definitely go back for more of the same .. first class. We will leave you with this little piece of advice (don’t know who to attribute it to but hope they don’t mind) prior to the election results being announced.

  • How To Start The Day
  • Open a new file on your computer
  • Name it ‘David Cameron’.
  • Send it to the recycle bin
  • Empty the recycle bin.
  • Your PC will ask “Do you want to get rid of David Cameron?”
  • Firmly click ‘Yes’.
  • Feel better

FK17 8BG         tel: 01877 330003          Roman Camp